“I’m not leaving you.”
She walked a few more steps. At the sound of her approach, he turned around. He was clad in a suit and tie, wearing expensive Italian shoes that were now ruined.
One of her high heels caught on a branch, and she pitched forward, breaking her fall by clinging to the trunk of a tree.
Gabriel was at her side in an instant. “Go back to the house before you get hurt.”
“No.”
Her hair was long and curling over her shoulders, arms now crossed in front of her chest because of the cold. A light dusting of white covered her head and her plum dress.
She looked like a snow angel—a figure one might find in a fairy tale or a snow globe, the dancing flakes hovering around her like friends. He was reminded of the time he surprised her in his library carrel and a ream of paper had been tossed into the air, falling all around her.
“Beautiful.” He was momentarily distracted by the sight of her. The warmth of his mouth caused his words to form clouds in the air between them.
She held out her pink and naked hand. “Come back with me.”
“She’s never going to let me go.”
“Who?”
“Paulina.”
“She needs to start a new life. She needs your help.”
“Help?” He glared at her. “You want me to help her? After she got on her knees and tried to take my pants down?”
“What?”
He clenched his teeth, cursing his own stupidity. “Nothing.”
“Don’t lie to me!”
“It was a desperate attempt by a desperate woman.”
“Did you say no?”
“Of course! What do you take me for?” His eyes flamed a dangerous blue.
“Were you surprised?”
A muscle jumped in his jaw. “No.”
Julia closed her hands so tightly her nails dug into her palms. “Why?”
Gabriel glanced at the trees behind her, unwilling to answer her question.
“Why weren’t you surprised?” she repeated, her voice growing louder.
“Because this is what she does.”
“Does or did?”
“What’s the difference?” he snapped.
Julia’s eyes narrowed. “If I have to explain it to you, then we are more damaged than I thought.”
He didn’t want to answer her. His recalcitrance was telegraphed by his eyes, his face, even his body.
She gave him a piercing stare.
Gabriel’s eyes flickered over her shoulder, into the distance, almost as if he were looking for an escape. Then he looked at her again.
“She’d show up on occasion and we’d…” His voice trailed off.
Julia felt ill. She screwed her eyes shut. “When I asked if Paulina was your mistress, you said no.”
“She was never my mistress.”
Julia’s eyes flew open. “Don’t play word games with me! Especially about your fuck buddies.”
He ground his teeth together. “That’s beneath you, Julianne.”
She laughed without amusement. “Oh, yes. It’s beneath me to tell the truth. But you can lie through your teeth!”
“I never lied to you about Paulina.”
“Yes, you did. No wonder you were so angry when I called her your fuck buddy in the Dante seminar. I was right.” Julia gave him a shattered look. “Were you with her in your bed? In the bed we slept in together?”
Gabriel lowered his eyes.
She began to back away from him. “I am so angry with you right now, I don’t know what to say.”
“I’m sorry.”
“That isn’t good enough,” she called, walking away from him. “When was the last time you slept with her?”
He followed her quickly, reaching out to grasp her arm.
“Don’t touch me!” She pulled back, stumbling over a tree root.
Gabriel caught her before she fell. “Just wait a minute, okay? Give me a chance to explain.” Satisfied that she was on surer footing, he released her.
“When I met you in September, things with Paulina had ended. I hadn’t been with her since last December, when I told her that we needed to stop once and for all.”
“You led me to believe that you ended things with her at Harvard. Do you have any idea how much this hurts? Do you have any idea how stupid this makes me feel? She traipses into your parents’ house as if she belongs there—as if I’m the fuck buddy. And no wonder! You’ve been sleeping with her for years.”
Gabriel shifted his shoes in the snow. “I was trying to protect you.”
“Tread very carefully, Gabriel. Tread very, very carefully.”
He froze. He’d never heard her use that tone before. All at once, he felt himself losing her. The mere idea was crippling.
He began speaking very quickly. “We only saw each other once or twice a year. As I said, I haven’t been with her since last December.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “Did you expect me to catalogue each and every sexual encounter I’ve ever had? I told you I had a past.”
Gabriel’s eyes met hers. He held her gaze, taking a tenuous step forward.
“Do you remember the night I told you about Maia?”