CHAPTER 18
I was awakened before my alarm by being thrown out of the bunk and onto the floor. The boat was sloshing from side to side, and I felt like we were suddenly out in the open ocean instead of an inland lake. The radio hissed a Coast Guard warning.
"...expected 70 mile per hour winds, tornado warnings... high wind advisories in effect..." the pre-recorded voice droned as interference crackled through the speakers. This was not a good time to be out on the water.
I picked up the radio, ready to call in our position, but we were too far out. The lake surrounded us like an ocean, and with the storm, we couldn't call out. We were on our own.
I stumbled to my feet, feeling the boat roll beneath me as I worked my way up the hatch and out onto the deck. Robbie stood tall at the helm, the wind whipping his hair as he kept our course straight. He smiled as he saw me. The sky was dark, but lightning was beginning to flash along the horizon, silhouetting him against the black sky.
Where the sailing had been smooth with only a little bit of chop, the lake became alive, releasing angry monsters shaped like waves. Lightning flashed in the sky, the clouds finally overtaking us and the waves no longer played gently with our boat. The water was black, tipped with harsh white. Spray crashed over the bow, sending cold droplets scattering across the deck. The sails hummed with tension.
"Robbie! We need to head to shore!" I shouted. "The Coast Guard is putting out weather advisories!"
Lightning flashed in the oncoming clouds, the horizon growing hazy with rain. The last thing I wanted was to be out in a storm. As a sailor, I had come to terms with sailing in hard weather, but that didn't mean I enjoyed it. With the dire warnings of the pre-race meeting, I wasn't looking forward to braving the storm. Bad things happened in storms. Lightning could strike the mast, sails could rip, the boat could capsize, and a sailor could fall overboard into the murky waters. This storm could easily kill us. With the angry skies surrounding our little boat, I thought heading to port was the safest choice.
"No, Sam, we can stay out," Robbie replied calmly. He glanced around at the oncoming storm, confidence filling his face. "We're winning."
I looked out across the water to see at least two boats turning toward shore. Grant was one of them. We were flying past him. I could see the look of dismay on his face as we flew past. We had the wind and were making excellent time. The others were falling back. I bit my lip, worry curling up in the pit of my stomach like a snake. The rumble of thunder echoed off the water.
"Sam, it's just a gale. Think of all the possibilities for your career if we win this?" Robbie adjusted the helm slightly. His brow darkened and he looked dead at me. "I want to win this, Sam. We didn't win last time, but we are going to blow this one out of the water. We are going to humiliate Grant. I can feel it in my bones that this is our race. We just have to take it."
I thought about it for a moment. The stronger winds from the storm could give us the edge, the speed, to leave everyone in our wake. Winning the Invitational would put my sailing career back on the map. I would get sponsors and quit that horrible waitressing job forever. With this race on my resume, I would be able to have my pick of partners and boats. I could make sailing my job, and Avery would have my income and Grace's. I needed this win.
"Okay, Captain. Reef the mainsail?" I asked. Reefing the mainsail would allow us to control the wind better, but it would slow us down.
"No," he said, a devilish smile on his face. "The Hope can handle it. Sheet in the jib, and we'll let this wind carry us into the finish line. We'll beat everyone there by a full day."
I nodded, the excitement of winning giving me courage. I hooked into my harness, making sure I was securely tethered to the boat. I didn't want an errant wave plucking me away and casting me into the choppy waters. I was a good swimmer, but there was no way I would survive the storm out there.
I grabbed one of the sheets controlling the angle of the jib, positioning the smaller triangle sail to catch the wind better. Avery's Hope lunged forward, skipping across the waves with almost childlike abandon. I laughed, feeling the boat dance as we left our competitors behind.
Rain came up from behind us, hitting the water like tiny stones. I didn't dare let go of the rope as I worked the sail. The wind was gusting and I had to control it. "Robbie!" I called out, feeling the boat begin to tip. I wasn't strong enough to do this on my own. This was why I sailed double-handed.
Robbie engaged the autopilot and rushed toward me, pulling the jib sheet from my hands. He released the rope and pulled. The wind died down for a moment as he worked the sail. For that one minute in time, I thought we were going to beat the storm. The two of us together would come out victorious and we could use the storm to shoot us across the water like a canon.
Lightning flashed, and the wind suddenly puffed in a different direction, filling the sail and pulling Robbie like a marionette on a string. In the bright light of the flash, I watched his arm stretch violently straight and then continue to bend in the wrong direction. Even over the thunder I heard a popping noise. Robbie's eyes went wide, and he dropped the rope, falling to his knees. His scream echoed in my ears.
The sheet that was once in his hands was flapping in the wind like a whip, the sail out of control. I jumped across the deck, water dripping off my cap. My hands knew what to do before my brain did.
I needed to lose the jib. The sail was overpowering the boat, and I couldn't control it without Robbie. Even with Robbie, I would have taken it down. The storm was going to rip the boat apart if I didn't. I let out the sheets, and the jib flapped in the wind like a pennant. The air filled with its clatter, noisy even over the increasing growl of thunder.
I grabbed the sheet that was once Robbie's, and wrapped it around a winch. With more strength than I knew I possessed, I grunted and ground the winch until the jib was neatly rolled up and locked away. It no longer was catching the wind, but we were still moving at a breakneck pace. Now I regretted not having reefed the mainsail as it sped us dangerously along. There was no way to fix it, though.
Robbie struggled to his feet, his face a mask of pain as he cradled his crooked arm against his body. He was going into shock. He could do nothing to help me now. I tied the ropes in place, watching Robbie carefully pick his way down into the cabin. Fear lurched in my stomach, dread numbing the stinging rain on my skin. He disappeared below deck, and I forced myself to move. If I didn't move, we were going to die out here in the storm.
A wave washed over the deck, the water cold and dark. I had to make sure Robbie was secure and then I had to get us out of trouble. I didn't stop to let myself think. If I thought about what was happening, I would freeze. I would fail. For all intents and purposes, I was sailing single-handed now. In a storm. It was my nightmare come to life.
I left the autopilot engaged, praying that there was nothing to hit in the immediate future, detached my line, and ducked into the cabin. Robbie was curled up on his bunk, his face white as a sheet.
"Hey," I said, taking a lee cloth and gently starting to tie him in. The boat was rocking violently, and I didn't want him to fall out of his bunk and injure himself further.
"I put my arm back, but it doesn't look right," he whispered through clenched teeth. I could see his elbow already beginning to swell. I touched the hand on his injured arm, checking for a pulse. Luckily, his heartbeat throbbed madly into my fingertips.
I turned and opened up the cooler, grabbing a bag of ice and ransacking the kitchen for some painkillers. I fed him four brown pills and tucked the ice up under his elbow. The boat lurched, and I nearly lost my footing. As much as I wanted to stay with him, to make sure he was all right, I had to get back up and keep the boat upright and sailing.
"I'll be back in a little bit to check on you. Just rest. If you need me, holler." I kissed his forehead, unsure if the cold wet was just from the rain. I put on my foul-weather gear, the raincoat and pants making me feel warmer. I hadn't even realized I was cold. Robbie whimpered in his bunk. I knew the pain must be excruciating; I did the only thing I could do, tucking the blanket around him a little bit tighter, and went back up on deck.
The wind nearly bowled me over as I stepped up on deck. I hooked my tether to the ring in the cockpit and closed up the boat. Robbie was going to have a rough trip, but I needed to keep him dry. The thought of him going into shock terrified me, but I had no choice. I had to get us to safety.
I disengaged the autopilot, locking my hands onto the wheel. Spray flew across the deck, splattering cold wet drops across my face. Every wave washed over the boat until it seemed we were more underwater than sailing across it. I focused only on the wheel, guiding us through the storm by the tiny light of the navigation in the cockpit.
I had never seen so much lightning in my life. It was like I was surrounded by strobe lights, each one going off at complete random. Blue light danced between the clouds and purple light seared as it touched the black water. It was like sailing through a flickering haunted house.
The wind screamed through the rigging, drowning out even my own thoughts. I wished it would stop, but I knew I had to keep pushing forward. I screamed back at the sky, venting my fear and frustration in a wordless howl. Fear racked my body, and I clung to the steering wheel in a desperate attempt to keep Robbie and I from drowning.
There was no way we were going to make it. I couldn't sail this boat by myself through this storm. The winds were too powerful and I was too small. I had been forced into sailing alone and now, because of my inabilities, people I cared about were going to suffer. Because I couldn't handle being alone, Avery was going to lose an aunt. Grace was going to lose her sister. I was going to lose Robbie.
It was hopeless. There was no way I could do this.
The last time I had been in a storm like this, the coast guard had saved me. I had been in a tiny dinghy, and the storm had shook me like a rag doll. My mast had snapped in two from the wind, and I was going to drown. I remembered wondering what my parents were going to say at my funeral. Just when all hope seemed lost, and that the waves were going to overtake me, The Valiant had appeared. The boom of the coast guard ship, tall and strong, had been like an angel cutting down the walls of hell to save me. I wished for a moment that the beautiful ship could save me once again, and for a moment, I thought I saw it...
Lightning danced across the sky, blue and green and full of venom, but I could have sworn I saw the dark outline of the Valiant. I shook my head, trying to clear the water from my eyes. That wasn't possible. There was no way that ship would be here. I had to be hallucinating.
I closed my eyes, and when I opened them, the silhouette was gone. I almost felt more alone than I had before. Panic began to claw its way up my throat, and I wanted to scream and make Robbie come back out. But I knew he couldn't. I had to do this on my own. I looked out at the horizon where I thought I had seen the ship, desperate for it to come back.
The ship never reappeared, but I suddenly remembered something my dad used to say.
Fear is all in your head. Choose to be brave, and you'll have all the courage you need.
It popped into my head, as if he had whispered it in my ear. A strange sort of calm settled across my shoulders, sending a sensation of warmth and confidence surging through me. I could do this. It would be difficult, but I could do this. I had to do this. I had to get Robbie to a doctor. The image of his pale face and clammy skin made me tighten my grip on the wheel. I had to be brave for Robbie.
I smiled at the storm. "I'm not scared of you," I said. I let the wind whip my words up into the sky, and I gave my best devil-may-care grin. If I was going out, they would find me smiling on the bottom of the lake still steering the boat. But I wasn't going out. I was going to win.
The sky was light enough that I could see the rigging against the clouds. The sky was still an angry black, but I could tell the sun had come up. The wheel squirmed like an impatient child and I didn't dare let go of it to check the time. I just had to get there fast enough to help Robbie. It didn't matter what time a clock said it was.
The radio chirped and chattered, the VHF bursting into life. The others were out of the storm or heading for home. Someone had a broken mast. I wished I could pick up the radio and relay my status. I screamed at the radio that my skipper was injured, but without a free hand to press the button, nothing went through. I didn't dare let go of the wheel, even to put it on autopilot. I was using every muscle I in my entire body to keep our heading. Every second was a battle to maintain control of the boat.
The shoreline in the distance emerged from the gloom of the rain, thin and almost translucent. I felt like crying for joy. I didn't dare to cry, though. I needed to see clearly; I knew this was the dangerous part, the part where it was easy to forget what I was doing, easy to think I was safe. I was in just as much danger here as I was out on the open water; the land was too far away to help me if I got sloppy.
The wind blew perpendicular into the sails, thankfully coming from just one side. I was reaching along, just making sure the wind didn't switch. I didn't even glance at my speed on the dial. It didn't matter. As long as my sails were pulling me along course, I didn't care. All that mattered was getting to shore as quickly as possible and getting Robbie to a doctor.
The waves had changed their sound. The watery fingers that had threatened my boat, tossing Robbie and me around like driftwood, were calmer here. The rain still fell, but I could see through it now. I wasn't sure if it just wasn't falling as hard, or if I had just grown numb to the stinging power of the droplets. Lightning still flashed, but the thunder no longer shook the sails. The wind was still screaming in the rigging, though, and I was sure I would never be able to hear again after hours of listening to the deafening noise.
I sailed through the breakwater of the marina, turning my sails into the wind as I approached the dock. Since the mainsail was no longer directly catching the wind, it flopped and danced like a fish out of water. I stared at it, barely registering that the racket it was making was dangerous. Men in yellow raincoats pointed toward my sail as I glided into a slip, yelling words I didn't understand. I knew it was English, but my brain was too tired to make out the words.
The boat slid slowly to a stop, and I let go of the wheel. My fingers ached, and I had to struggle to release it. The sail was still flapping and clattering in the wind. I had to tie it down. I could feel myself screaming as I ran to the lines, sheeting the sail so that the men could come aboard.
"MY SKIPPER!" I shouted as I pulled down the sail, desperate for the men on the dock to save Robbie. I prayed he was still okay. I hadn't been able to check on him, and I was terrified that he might have gone into shock. I needed him to be all right. I needed him to be there when I woke up tomorrow.
Three men tied my boat to the dock, ignoring the rain and the wind as if it didn't exist. I didn't care about the boat. I just wanted them to save Robbie.
I secured the sail, knowing they wouldn't come aboard until it was safe, and as soon as the knot was tied, I was at the hatch. I bounded down the steps, my tears mixing with the rain as I ran to him. Please, please, please... I chanted silently. The cabin seemed to stretch out into infinity as I crossed the space to him.
He was still tied in place, his skin cold and clammy. He gave me a weak smile as I pulled violently at the lee cloths holding him in place. The icepack had melted long ago, and I threw the bag of water on the floor. I touched his cheek. His green eyes were glassy and full of pain.
"We've got him now," a kind voice said behind me, pushing me gently out of the way. A burly sailor with a bushy beard and swarthy features picked Robbie up as though he were a child. An ambulance was waiting by the dock, the red and blue lights swirling in the windy rain. I followed the big man carrying Robbie until we reached the ambulance. I needed to go with him, but the doors closed before I could step in.
I dropped to my knees on the asphalt, the rain running in rivers down the street. I didn't care. Robbie was safe. I had succeeded. I knew they would take care of him. Kind hands lifted me from the ground, and I was half carried to a truck. The motor was running, and it was warm inside. I didn't even remember hearing the door shut before I fell asleep.