Dear Diary,
I saw a dirty movie yesterday. Not on purpose. I was just flipping channels and this French film came on and this lady was doing stuff with this man. And then he was watching her do something to herself. It was so awkward to watch. And then, of course, TJ walks in and catches me. He stared at the TV and then at me and then at the TV again and just laughed. I turned the TV off right away, but he just grinned and turned the movie back on. “There’s no shame in pleasuring yourself, Mila,” he said softly and I thought I was going to die of embarrassment. He walked away then and I dismissed it from my mind, but last night I had a dirty dream and all I could think about was TJ guiding me and teaching me how to pleasure myself. I’m not sure what that means—if it’s wishful dreaming or if I’m some sort of pervert now. I’m not going to tell anyone about the dream, not even Sally. How am I supposed to tell her that TJ is in my dreams doing things to me that make my body feel so strange and good? I just hope that one day, those feelings happen in real life as well. I think TJ has a magic touch.
Mila
XOXO
“Sally, are you awake?” I whispered to her for what must have been the tenth time that morning. I wasn't sure why she was in such a deep sleep. Maybe she’d had too much to drink, but she had already been gone from the fire when TJ and I had gotten back from our skinny-dip. Cody, Troy and Barbie had all been laughing and drinking when we’d gotten back and they hadn’t even seem concerned that we’d been gone for so long. Barbie had kinda looked at me with narrowed eyes when we’d gotten back, but not for long, and Cody had essentially ignored me, which had been surprising for how crazily he'd been acting before we’d left. “Sally,” I said louder this time as I noticed her rolling onto her back.
“Ugh,” she said as she lazily opened one eye and looked at me.
“Are you awake?” I grinned over at her.
“No.” She moaned and closed her eye again and rolled over.
“Sally, wake up.” I groaned. “We need to talk.”
“I’m sleeping,” she said and pulled the blanket over her head.
I leaned over, pulled the blanket down and said loudly, “TJ and I fucked last night.”
“What?” she said, her eyes popping open as she rolled over to look at me in shock. “You did not,” she said, her jaw open as she stared at me, her eyes searching mine. “How was it? Was he good?”
“It was amazing.” I laughed. “And no, we didn’t actually fuck. Well, at least not really.”
“What do you mean not really?” she asked with a frown as she yawned. “You either did or you didn’t. There is no such thing as kinda fucking.” Then she sat up straight and her brown eyes widened in excitement. “Unless you let him do anal.” She raised an eyebrow at me. “Is that what you did? Oh, my God, Mila, I can’t believe you let—”
“Sally.” I rolled my eyes at her and laughed. “He finger-fucked me. No anal.”
“Oh snap,” she said, though she still looked shocked. “I knew something crazy would go down. Wow.”
“Wow, indeed.” I fell back against my pillows. “And then he went down on me.”
“What?” she said loudly. “He did both?”
“Yup.” I nodded and grinned at her. “I came both times.” I writhed in memory. “I wanted him to fuck me.” I sighed. “So badly. I thought he was going to. He was right there.” I bit my lower lip and stared at Sally. “It felt so good.”
“So why didn’t he?” Sally looked confused.
“He said something about Troy.” I groaned. “I guess he felt bad because he thinks Troy is my man.”
“Hmm.” Sally frowned again. “You think so?”
“Yeah.” I nodded. “He said, ‘Let Troy make love to you. I only fuck.’ ”
“Hmm,” Sally said again. “He didn’t care about Troy when he was fingering you or eating you out, though?”
“Yeah, who knows.” I sighed. “Also, why didn’t you tell me your plan?”
“What plan?” Sally looked confused.
“Your plan to hire Troy,” I said softly. “I mean, it was a good idea, but it would have been nice if you would have told me before. Also, he seems to be paying more attention to Barbie.”