RUSH
Nan was a sobbing mess. As mean as she was my heart broke for her. She was still my little sister and she had been done wrong. By both her parents. I had tried all my life to be the one person she could count on but I hadn’t been enough. She needed to feel loved and accepted by one of her lousy excuses for parents.
“She hates me,” Nan sniffed and hiccupped. “Right there in front of Kiro she made me look like a fool. She didn’t even care that I’m trying to find a way to get him to want me.”
I was sure that Nan had pushed Blaire to say the things that she did but I didn’t point that out. I was jut now, after an hour, getting Nan to calm down enough to talk to me. She needed someone right now and I was pretty sure I was the only person on the planet who cared about her problems.
“I know you love her but she’s mean. She’s cold and mean. You remember when she pointed that gun at me,” Nan sniffled and wiped at her tear soaked face.
“That was a little different. Mom and Abe had just ripped her world out from under her. She was upset and you were taunting her.”
Nan let out a hard laugh. “You will always take up for her. Even if she made fun of me and my need to have a parent who wants me right there in front of everyone. In front of Harlow. Dean. Kiro. She doesn’t care about my feelings.”
Blaire was pregnant and her emotions were harder for her to control. However, I needed to talk to her about just being quiet around Nan. The sooner I got her and Kiro on good terms the sooner we could leave. I didn’t like having to juggle Blaire and my sister. It was too much.
“She shouldn’t have said what she did. Although you shouldn’t have said anything to her either.”
“I was just reminding her that you loved me too. She was glaring at me so hatefully.”
Blaire had many reasons to hate Nan. I knew that. I just wished she’d learn to let that all go. When she had insisted we come here I’d thought it was her way of forgiving Nan. Looked like I was wrong.
“I’ll deal with Blaire. This won’t happen again. But you need to start finding ways to let go of this bitterness Nan. I can’t help you if you keep acting like this in front of Kiro. He is used to dealing with Harlow. Not you. Harlow is quiet and keeps to herself. That’s all Kiro will put up with and I am sure as a child she figured that out fast. You need to realize Kiro won’t accept you for you. He is spoiled and selfish. He’s a legend. People adore him and he thrives on it.”
“I hate my life. I... I think sometimes that it would be easier on everyone if I just ended it.”
I felt a sharp ache in my chest and I reached over and pulled her into my arms. “You can’t do that because I love you. I want you around. You need a chance to find happiness, Nan. Don’t do this to yourself. And don’t ever, and I mean EVER, say something like that again.”
She nodded against my chest and began to cry softly. I wondered if my wounded sister would ever be healed.
It was several hours later before I got back to the house. Nan was at her hotel. She refused to stay in the house with Kiro and Harlow. I had texted Blaire twice and I’d heard nothing from her. I was worried. I kept telling myself that she was asleep.
I hurried up to our room and opened the door to find her curled up on the bed asleep. She was still wearing her dress and she looked cold. I walked over to her and started to undress her gently. I didn’t want to wake her but I also didn’t want her uncomfortable while she slept.
Once I had her undressed I pulled back the covers and tucked her in. I couldn’t believe she’d said something hurtful to Nan. But then Nan had been adamant that Blaire had lashed out at her. It was probably the pregnancy hormones. I bent down and kissed Blaire’s head before standing up and heading to go get a shower. We’d not even been here one day and I was already stressed and ready to leave.
The banging on the door started just after my head hit the pillow. Or at least it felt like it. Blaire stirred in my arms and I noticed the sun pouring in through the windows. Maybe I had gotten some sleep.
“Who’s that?” Blaire asked in a sleepy whisper.
I wasn’t sure but I hadn’t wanted Blaire woken up like this. I knew she’d sat up late waiting on me. “Not sure. Stay here,” I replied and kissed her head before getting out of the bed and pulling on my discarded jeans.
I jerked open the bedroom door to find my dad looking hung over and pissed. “You got shit to deal with. Whatever the f*ck you said to Nan last night didn’t help. Her ass is moving in,” Dean snarled.
That was a step in the right direction. She needed a chance to get used to Kiro. This would be good for them. “Then my talk did help. It’s time Kiro accepts her and makes up for lost time.”
Dean let out a hard laugh. “That won’t happen, Rush. You’re blowing smoke up her ass if that’s what you’re telling her. Kiro is Kiro. He ain’t a f*cking daddy figure and that is what she wants.”
Maybe. But I had to at least help her try.
“Just get downstairs and help before all hell breaks loose,” Dean said before turning and stalking off.
I closed the door before turning back to Blaire. She was sitting up in bed with her hair messy from sleep and the sheet pulled up to her bare chest. What I really wanted was to crawl back in bed with her and forget this bullshit with Nan.
“I’m sorry,” I told her as I walked back over to the bed.
She frowned. “When did you get back last night?”
“Late. Nan was difficult.”
Blaire nodded stiffly then dropped her gaze from mine. I went over to her side of the bed and sat down beside her then slipped a finger under her chin and tilted her head up to look at me. “Hey, what’s wrong?”
She let out a weary sigh. “You could have called. I waited for you to call. I fell asleep worried about you.”
“I did call,” I assured her. “You didn’t answer.”
Blaire reached for her phone and looked down at it. “You called me after eleven. I had fallen asleep by that time. I meant you could have called sooner than that.”
She was right. I should have. Damn Nan and Kiro. I was not going to put Blaire second to anyone else again. I had sworn she came first and I meant it. Yet last night I’d let her down.
BLAIRE
I was trying very hard not to sound like a baby but I was upset.
“I should have called you sooner. I’m sorry. Nan started threatening to off herself and I panicked. I was in big brother mode.”
He was always in big brother mode with Nan. Coming here I knew I was in for a lot of Nan but it was harder than I’d imagined. Especially after the way she’d treated me last night. I didn’t believe for a minute that she’d kill herself.
“She’s manipulating you. I hate to see her do that.”
Rush stood up and ran his hand through his hair and walked over to the window. He didn’t agree with me. I could tell by the stiff way he was holding his shoulders. He looked defensive. “She’s upset and hurt. I know she’s been a bitch to you in the past but right now I need you. For me, could you not say hurtful things to her? I’m really worried about her mental stability at the moment.”
Hurtful things? I hadn’t said anything to Nan. Did he think I was going to? “I was the one who said we should come. I understand she needs your help. Why would you think that I would say hurtful things to her?” I asked, standing up.
Rush let his head fall back and he closed his eyes tightly like he really didn’t want to be having this conversation. Something was wrong.
“I know what you said to her last night at the table. She told me. And yeah, you have every right to say those things to her but right now I just need you not to. The sooner I can fix this the sooner we head back to Rosemary and leave this nightmare.”
“What did I say to her last night at the table? I’m not following you,” I replied feeling a sick knot in my stomach. Was Nan lying about me? She was the one who had said hurtful things at the table. Not me.
“She feels like you made fun of her. Just ... it’s probably best if you just don’t talk to her.”
I sat back down on the bed and let last night’s conversations run through my head. How did she feel like I’d made fun of her? She’d attacked me.
A soft knock on the door interrupted what I was about to say and Rush let out a frustrated growl before stalking over to open it.
“Sorry. I don’t want to disturb y’all but Nan is demanding to know what room is Daddy’s. She doesn’t need to wake him up. That would be bad,” Harlow’s soft-spoken voice sounded anxious.
“Shit,” Rush muttered. He glanced back at me. “I’m sorry. I’ll be back in a few minutes. Just go back to bed and get some rest. I won’t let anyone else disturb you.”
Once the door was closed I let the tears fall. When I’d told him to come deal with Nan I’d thought this would be easier. I had hoped after her accident and her comment about being a part of the baby’s life that she’d be more manageable. I was wrong. Coming here had been a bad idea.
My stomach cramped and I froze. I sat still and waited on the baby to kick and reassure me everything was okay. Nothing happened. I put both my hands on my stomach and the cramp came again. Wincing I tried to calm my heart as it started to race. Something was wrong. A wave of nausea hit me and I laid back and closed my eyes. Maybe I’d gotten up too quick this morning. I needed to start being more careful. All the high-strung tension in this house was getting to me.
I closed my eyes and took slow deep breaths. No more cramps came and I felt a soft kick against my hand. With that little bit of reassurance I drifted off to sleep.
When I opened my eyes the sun had moved and was shinning brightly through the windows. It had to be after lunch. I reached for my phone and checked the time. It was one. I must have been more tired than I thought.
I rolled over to get up and a tray of food was sitting on a small table beside the bed. I wrapped the sheet around me and went over to it. I smiled as I picked up the small note with Rush’s familiar scrawl on it.
I’m sorry about this morning. You were exhausted and I unloaded on you. None of this is your fault. I just want to get it all over with and get you back home. Eat something. I’m going to go see if I can talk to Kiro.
I love you more than life,
Rush.
I picked up the silver cover that had been protecting my plate to find fresh strawberries and cream, salmon, and a slice of toast. My stomach still wasn’t feeling that great so I decided to stay away from the salmon but I took a strawberry and dipped it into the cream before taking a bite. The sweet taste hit my tongue and I felt better. Sitting on the edge of the bed, I finished all the strawberries and toast before getting up and going to get a shower.
RUSH
It was abnormally warm for the end of November. I had put on shorts and a tee shirt and come outside to enjoy the heat of the California sunshine.
Blaire still hadn’t come out of the room. If she wasn’t up soon I was going to get her a new plate of food and go feed her myself. I was glad she was getting sleep but she needed to eat too. Harlow had said she didn’t think Blaire ate much at dinner last night. I should have stayed with her and gone after Nan once I had Blaire tucked away in bed.
If my overly dramatic sister wasn’t so damn volatile I wouldn’t be trying to help her. I just wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I ignored her and something happened to her. As much of a pain in the ass as she was, she was still my sister. I still saw the little girl with pigtails smiling up at me with a toothless grin. She’d been mine when we were growing up. No one else took care of her. It was hard for me to forget that.
“Where’s that girl of yours?” Kiro asked as he sauntered out to the back patio where I’d decided to hide from Nan.
“She’s sleeping,” I replied, glad to see Kiro was outside smoking instead of inside.
“She’s a sweet thing. Reminds me of my Harlow,” he said before sticking the cigarette he was holding back between his lips.
“Yeah. She’s pretty damn perfect,” I agreed.
“You need to protect her a little more from Nan. She was spilling venom all over her last night. Your girl handled it well. I was damn impressed. But you need to take better care of her,” he drawled then flicked ashes from his cigarette before turning and walking back to the house.
I started to ask him what he was talking about when Nan came barreling out of the door wearing a bikini and a pair of stilettos.
“What’re you doing, girl?” Kiro asked her in an annoyed tone.
“Going to get some sun. Why? You want to join me? Maybe talk to me?” Nan spat out hatefully. I wanted to shake her and ask her why she had to be so damn difficult.
“No. I wanna know when you’re gonna move your ass outta my house. You keep stirring up drama. Harlow won’t even come out of her damn room. It’s time you go harass your momma for awhile and leave me in peace.” I winced at the sight of the pain in Nan’s eyes. Damn, Kiro was heartless.
“Why am I even trying? You don’t want to know me. You don’t care to know me. You have Harlow and that’s all you want. I’m nothing to you,” Nan screamed.
“Harlow isn’t a mean bitch, Nan. Try being a normal human and I just might want to get to know you. I didn’t stay with your momma for a reason girl. Guess what the reason was,” he snarled and pushed past her and into the house.
Nan’s eyes looked empty as she stood there staring at the door. Dammit. I stood up and went over to her. She noticed me and shook her head. “No. I don’t want you either. You hate me too. You picked her. Everyone picks someone else. No one wants me,” Nan cried and spun around and took off running back into the house.
I stopped at the door and listened as her heels clicked loudly on the floor until they faded away. I would have to go get her and talk to her but I was going to give her time to calm down. She needed some alone time.
“That didn’t sound good,” Blaire said, breaking into my thoughts. I turned to see her walking down the stairs. Her long blond hair was pulled up and she was wearing a light blue swimsuit with a white see through cover up that hung off her shoulder and hit at mid thigh. Her eyes looked rested but what she’d just heard had caused a worried frown.
“Yeah, it was brutal,” I replied, closing the distance between us and pulling her to me before I kissed those pink full lips. I didn’t like seeing her frown so much. She slipped her arms around my waist and opened her mouth to me. I tasted the minty flavor of her toothpaste and enjoyed the silky warmth of her mouth.
She moved her lips over mine and a soft moan escaped her mouth. Taking her back upstairs to the bedroom was sounding good. She started to pull back and I gazed down into her heavy lidded eyes. She was smiling contentedly. “Harlow said it was warm today. I thought I’d come get some sunshine. I’ve been inside too much,” she said.
She needed fresh air. “I think that’s a good idea. Why don’t you go lay down in one of the lounge chairs and I’ll rub your feet.”
Her eyes twinkled with excitement and I almost laughed. She loved having her feet rubbed lately. I knew it was because she was carrying more weight with the baby and she wasn’t used to it. “That sounds wonderful,” she agreed and hurried over to settle in the closest lounge chair.
My phone rang in my pocket and I started to ignore it. Blaire looked up at me as I stood over her. “Aren’t you gonna answer it?” she asked.
I slipped my hand into my pocket and saw Nan’s number flashing on the screen. I should ignore it. This couldn’t be good. I wanted time with Blaire. I wanted to rub her feet and watch the sexy little faces she made while I did it.
“Just answer it, Rush. If you don’t you’ll worry,” she said.
Muttering a curse, I clicked answer and held it to my ear. Before I could say hello Nan’s loud sobs greeted me.
“Don’t come after me. I told you last night I wanted to end it and I do. This is it. Everyone hates me and I’m done. Goodbye, Rush,” she cried into the phone before ending the call.
“F*ck,” I growled, stuffing my phone back into my pocket. I had to go after her. I wanted to believe Blaire was right and Nan wouldn’t hurt herself but I couldn’t just assume this.
“She’s threatening to kill herself again,” I said, looking down at Blaire and the disappointed look on her face. I was letting her down. I hated this. I wish we’d never come but then I also would never be able to forgive myself if something happened to Nan.
“Go on. It’s okay. She needs you so she’s acting out to get your attention,” Blaire replied. Her words made sense. She was probably right.
“We don’t know that she’s not really going to try something. I can’t just believe this is an empty threat.”
“I know that.”
“I’m all she has, Blaire,” I snapped, not meaning to. I wasn’t mad at Blaire. I was mad that she was so damn understanding and she didn’t have to be. I was mad that she kept being put on hold for my family. I hated that she just let me go every time without making me feel guilty. I hated all of this.
“I know,” she replied again. This time I could hear the hurt in her voice and I hated myself for putting it there.
“I’m sorry, I just—”
“You just need to go check on your sister. I understand,” Blaire finished for me. The hard tone in her voice worried me but we didn’t have time to deal with this right now. The longer I stood here the worse this was going to get. I’d make this up to her later today. I was also going to threaten to check Nan into a mental hospital until she stopped threatening to off herself. Then we were going back to Rosemary. I wanted my life back.
BLAIRE
Over the next few days things went from tense to bad to worse. Rush hardly stayed at the mansion. When he did it was short lived. Nan and Kiro always fought and she went off running. Rush was right behind her.
I knew this was the reason we had come here but I hadn’t expected this. Nan was really more of an immature child than I realized. Kiro was an ass. Harlow saw it and she dealt with it. She wasn’t storming around the house yelling about being unloved. She mostly stayed tucked away in her room and read. Every once in a while she would come outside with me when it was warm enough.
I missed Rush. I missed seeing him smile. He wasn’t doing much of that anymore. I had mentioned last night that maybe he needed to give Nan some room to pitch a fit and let her see that he wasn’t going to come running. See how she handled it. He’d gotten frustrated with me. “She’s threatening to kill herself, Blaire. I can’t ignore that. I don’t believe she’d do it either but I still can’t ignore it. Someone has to give a shit. That someone is me. No one else does.”
I hadn’t said anything more after that. He didn’t want to listen to me and I didn’t want him to snap at me. It was wearing on me. The whole situation was.
I was beginning to understand why Harlow hid away. Twice now I’d walked in on Kiro screwing some girl who looked my age. Not a mental picture I wanted. He just did it wherever he pleased. I’d learned to stay the heck away from the game room. That pool table was not used for pool.
A knock on my door broke into my thoughts and for once I was glad. I didn’t want to think about the distance between me and Rush right now. It made me tense. Harlow stuck her head in the room. “Want to go out to the pool with me? Dad isn’t home so no sexcapades are going on out there,” she said with a shy smile.
We had also walked out on Kiro naked in the pool with not one but two girls. That had been awkward. He’d laughed so loudly I was sure his neighbors could hear him. Instead of being embarrassed or ashamed of his behavior he thought it was hilarious.
“Sounds good. I’ll get on my swimsuit and meet you out there,” I told her. Harlow was the only good thing about this place. I was ready to go back to Rosemary and I was ready to have my Rush back instead of this angry uptight one that had taken his place. But I was going to miss Harlow.
I quickly changed into my swimsuit and pulled on my cover-up on before heading down to the pool. It was an elaborate piece of work. The waterfalls and water fountain in the middle were just the icing. The detail and thought that had been put into this pool made it truly look like something out of an exotic rainforest somewhere. It was soothing just to look at.
Harlow was sitting on a lounger reading from her ereader when I got down there. I took the seat beside her and stretched out my legs. Today was the warmest day we had had so far. It was eighty degrees. Crazy considering it was two days until December.
I started to ask Harlow about how they celebrated the holidays when something stopped me.
The cramping was back. I pulled my knees up and cradled my stomach trying real hard not to cry. I had wanted to tell Rush about this after the last time but before I’d had a chance he’d left with Nan again.
“Blaire? Are you okay?” Harlow asked from beside me.
“I’m not sure,” I replied honestly. A tear slipped through and I hated that she was about to see me like this. I wanted to go home.
Harlow moved over to sit on the edge of my lounger and studied me. “Are you hurting?” she asked.
I just nodded. Harlow frowned and glanced around. “Where is Rush?”
“Gone to check on Nan,” I replied as my stomach cramped up again and I winced.
Harlow stood up. “I don’t think pregnant women are supposed to wince and cry from pain. We need to go have you checked on. I can drive you to my doctor. He’s a real big fan of Daddy’s so he’ll see you without an appointment. I’ll call his office on our way.”
I didn’t want to be the one overreacting. So having Harlow do it for me made the decision easier. I nodded and let her take my hand and help me up. “I need to go change clothes first,” I said looking down at the swimsuit and cover up I had just put on.
“You go change and I will too. Then I’ll go pull my car around to the front entrance. I can call my doctor on our way.”
“Thank you,” I replied before heading inside and up to Rush’s room. I thought about calling Rush but changed my mind. He already had one female needing him. This might be nothing more than gas for all I knew. I would call him if the doctor thought I should. No reason to put more stress on him.
The little voice in my head whispered what I didn’t want to admit to myself. “You’re afraid you and the baby won’t come first. You don’t want him to have to choose.”
I pushed the thought away. Changing my bikini bottoms for a pair of panties, I then pulled a sundress on before quickly heading back downstairs. I would feel better after a doctor told me I was okay. Just as I reached the bottom step another pain hit me and I had to grab the railing to hold myself up. The cramping made me whimper.
“You okay?” the concerned tone of Dean’s voice surprised me.
I forced a smile and nodded. “Yeah, I’m okay. I’m just going to get checked out at Harlow’s OB/GYN. I’ll be back soon. Tell Rush I’ll call him if I need to.”
“Where’s Rush at?” Dean called out after me as I made my way to the door.
“With Nan,” I replied, then opened the door and went to get in Harlow’s Audi convertible.
Harlow hadn’t been wrong when she said that her doctor would see me right away. We had arrived and the nurse had ushered me back without asking me to fill out paperwork or even sign in.
“I’ll wait out here,” Harlow told me.
I was glad she wasn’t going to come back with me. I liked Harlow but we weren’t close enough for her to accompany me to an examination room just yet.
“Go ahead and take off your bottoms. You can leave your top on. And cover up with the blanket on the table. The doctor will be in in just a moment,” the lady informed me. I nodded and thanked her. Once the door was closed behind her I went into the changing room and slipped my bottoms off.
The red streak in my panties made me pause and take a deep breath. The terror slowly starting to invade my thoughts made breathing difficult. I stood there staring down at my panties wondering if this was normal. If this could be okay. I should have called Rush. I took a moment to pray. I didn’t do it often but right now I needed someone to protect my baby.
After my silent plea, I stepped out of the dressing room, went over to the table and covered up my bare bottom half. A swift knock on the door then a pause before it opened made me feel marginally better. I was going to have help. This doctor would know what to do. I hoped. A much younger than I expected man walked in followed by the nurse who had brought me to the room.
“Miss Wynn, I’m Doctor Sheridan. Harlow told me that you’re experiencing cramps and you’re a long way from your doctor in Florida.”
I nodded. “Yes, sir. I’m also bleeding a little.” The words came out in a choked sob I hadn’t been expecting.
“There now, this could be something as simple as dehydration. Don’t worry it won’t help things,” he said as he took his seat and had me slip my feet up into the stirrups. “What are you doing so far away from home?” he asked as he started to examine me.
“My fiancé and I are here visiting his father,” I explained and left it at that. No reason to tell the man the real reason we were here.
“How do you know Harlow?” he asked.
“My fiancé’s father is Dean Finlay,” I said figuring if the man was a fan of Kiro he’d be able to figure that out easy enough.
He paused. “Really? So this baby we’re checking on in here is Dean Finlay’s grandchild?”
I nodded and wished he’d stop asking so many questions and get on with the exam. I needed to know my baby was okay. He seemed to get more serious about his examination.
“I don’t want to alarm you Miss Wynn but we need to do an ultrasound to check the baby. After that, I want to monitor you and the baby for a couple of hours here in the office. This happens often. I am just taking precautions and making sure all is well. I also want you to drink some fluids for me. Melanie will bring you something to drink once we get finished with the ultrasound. We have a room in the back just for this. It has a comfortable bed. Melanie will dim the lights and play relaxing music while you rest.
He wasn’t admitting me to the hospital. This was a good thing... right? I managed to nod again.
“I’ll have Melanie go tell Harlow what we’re doing in case she wants to go do something else until you call her. Is that alright with you?” he asked.
I had forgotten about Harlow. “Yes, of course. Tell her I said to leave. I’ll let her know when to come back. I don’t want her sitting here all that time.”
The doctor nodded and headed out the door. The nurse who I was assuming was Melanie, helped me up. “Go get your bottoms back on and then I’ll take you to get the ultrasound.”