“Yeah, and when I got here, no one was home. I used the hide-a-key and stayed on the couch. Ry just showed up. My phone died, so he let me call you from his.”
I guess it’s good that she didn’t try to drive home after she realized we weren’t there. “Everything okay?”
“Yeah . . . I was upset last night. After you guys left, I got sad and I was thinking about . . .” Her voice cracks. “Her birthday is coming up, and I just miss her so much.”
“Hang tight. I’m on my way.” If she could just hold it together until I get home so Ryder doesn’t have to coddle his own mother . . .
“Where were you last night, Cam? I needed you.” More crying.
“We’ll talk when I get home.” I pull up to Eve’s duplex.
“But—”
I press End, exhale hard, and turn to say something to Eve that’ll smooth over our conversation at breakfast, but the look on her face freezes the words in my throat.
Her eyes are wide, face pale, lips parted and staring right at me.
“Eve?”
She blinks rapidly, her lips close, and she grabs her purse. “I gotta go.”
Before I can say goodbye, she’s out of the truck and halfway to her front door. At a slow crawl, realization filters in. My phone call from D’lilah. I try to think about what Eve might’ve heard that upset her. Talking to another woman after we spent the night together was probably enough.
I move to chase after her and explain, but maybe this is for the best. It’s not smart for us to continue seeing each other. There are a thousand reasons why I need to stay away, but only one reason why I don’t want to. I can’t get enough of her. I suppose it’s better that she hate me. Because if she doesn’t lock me out, there’s no way I’ll be strong enough to leave her alone.
Eleven
Eve
“Is yellow the only unisex color out there? Because I’m not gonna lie.” I point to the pukey fabric swatch. “That looks like barf.”
Raven and I have been sitting at her dining room table, going through catalogs and flipping through fabric and paint samples for the last two hours. I’m trying to be helpful, but not seeing or hearing from Cameron in almost a month is starting to affect my mood.
He did say there’d be a next time. I guess I’d hoped it would be sooner than later. A tiny voice in my head laughs that I’d give him another chance after he took a call from another woman after spending the night with me. I was pissed for a day, but when he didn’t come knocking the next week or the following two, I pretty much forgave him. That’s me, Doormat Dawson.
Raven holds the fabric up to the light, and her teeth tug her lower lip. “Well, crap.” Her hands drop back to the table, and her head quickly follows. “Ugh . . . this is hell.”
“Oh don’t be so dramatic.” I flip through a few pages of a catalog when I feel her eyes on me. I turn to find her scowling. “What?”
“Dramatic? I was about to decorate my baby’s room in the color of puke. What’s wrong with me? The baby isn’t even born yet”—she throws her arms out to her sides—“and already I’m a terrible mother.” Her face twists in disgust, and her eyes get glossy.
Okaaay. What the hell? “That’s it. Who are you and what’ve you done with my best friend?”
Her lips tick with what might be a smile, and she takes a long breath. “Sorry, it’s just . . .” She shakes her head. “Forget it.”
“Oh, no, ya don’t.” I twist my stool to face her. “You already opened the door. There’s no going back now. Spill.”
Resting her elbows on the bar, she shoves both hands into her hair. “I don’t know what I’m doing. All I ever wanted was a family, and now that I’m finally getting one, I’m terrified I’ll end up screwing it up. I don’t know how to be a mom.”
“Who does? I mean I think the most important part is you love your kid.” I shrug and flip a few pages of the Pottery Barn Kids catalog. “You already have that, so the rest is just details.”
“You’re probably right. Gosh, I feel like I’m going crazy. Jonah’s being so stubborn, and my emotions are all over the place.”
“Stubborn about what?”
She pushes back and puts both hands on her belly. “Don’t get me wrong. I love Jonah, and he’s so protective, which is awesome, ya know?”
“But . . .?”
Another deep breath. “He took away the Nova.”
“What?” He took away her car? What? Like she’s a kid who’s been grounded? “Why?”
She shakes her head. “He’s worried about the baby and me. I totally understand. I mean he lost his dad in a car accident, and the Nova doesn’t have airbags and only has lap belts.”
“So what? You’re stuck at home and work with no car? That’s bullshit, Rave!”
Her eyes widen and she shakes her head. “Oh no, I’m driving his truck, and he takes the Impala or the Camaro.”