My mind scrambles for the right thing to say, but a frantic need to keep her here moves my body first.
She heads for the door and I grab her arm. “No, wait. Don’t go.”
She’s silent, her back to me, head drooping between her shoulders.
“I didn’t mean to make you feel bad or ashamed. I’m just surprised that someone as innocent and open as you could have been raised—”
“By a hooker.” She tugs against my hold, but I don’t let go. Her head drops even lower. “Just say it, Jonah.”
Pain twists in my chest at the demoralized sound in her voice. She sat and listened to me talk about my family and share my pain, but the second she opens up, I treat her like a leper.
“Look, Raven, I’m not good at this . . . relating to people and sharing. Fuck.” I breathe deep and search for the right words to keep her from pushing me away. “I think you’re amazing.” Her muscles tense beneath my hand. “It doesn’t matter how you were raised or who you were raised by. All that matters is who you are now.”
She turns toward me, her eyebrows pinched and her mouth in a flat line.
I release her arm and shove my hands in my pockets to keep from grabbing her and kissing that look off her face. “The woman I see right now, she’s something special.”
Her pinched eyebrows dissolve into wide eyes, and a dazzling smile threatens to send me to my knees.
“Thank you.” Her words are said in that breathy way that I want to feel against my lips.
We stand only a foot apart, lost in the intensity of what we’ve just shared, giving each other a little piece of ourselves. I’m balancing on the edge of something huge. I try to push back, clawing my way to solid ground, when everything in me screams to swan dive off the precipice.
My emotions swirl in a cocktail of confusion, desire warring with self-preservation. But through this, one thing is clear. There is no working this girl out of my system. From the moment she walked out of Guy’s Garage, she burrowed in deep. This whole time I’ve been kicking and fighting against her pull. What if I just let go?
I’ve been avoiding this since the day I left home, not wanting to be responsible for another person’s happiness and wellbeing. But locked into the aquamarine eyes of the woman in front of me, I realize I’d give up everything for the chance to take care of her.
I have a choice to make, and screwing her out of my system isn’t one of them: face my fears and take a shot at a relationship or let her go. She’ll go on living her life until someone worthy of her love comes along.
Oh, hell no!
My teeth clench and possessive fury twists my gut. The thought of her loving some piece of shit with her gorgeous body, some other guy’s hands tangled in her hair as he devours her mouth, brings a growl from my chest.
“Do you have a boyfriend, Raven?”
“What? No!” Her response comes out fast and defensive.
Well, thank fuck for that.
My lips curl so hard my cheeks ache. Decision made.
“What are you doing tomorrow?”
She chews on her lip and looks to the floor. “Um . . . tomorrow is Saturday. I’m off.”
I step closer—so close that I can feel the heat coming off her body. Her breath catches and I detect the unmistakable lust in her eyes. “Jonah?”
The way she says my name saturates my blood with arousal, and I fight to keep my eyes from rolling back in my head.
“Come over tomorrow. I’m having a barbeque. I want you there.” My voice sounds deep and gravelly in my own ears. I’m not taking no for an answer. I can’t. I want her, and now that I’ve stopped fighting it, I can’t get her soon enough.
“Okay.”
I grin at her simple answer to what wasn’t a question. I cup her face then slide my hand back to fork my fingers into her hair at her nape. Her eyes flutter closed. Warmth explodes in my chest, flooding my veins and making my heart race. As much as I want to kiss her, I force myself to step back.
“Let’s get back to work.” I turn back to the Impala.
The tiny whimper from her gives me hope. She’s just as wound up as I am. If the sexual tension is already this high, what will the sex be like?
I freeze as dread drops in my stomach, heavy and unwelcome. I’ve never slept with the same girl more than once. I lose interest seconds after I orgasm. What if I lose interest in Raven?
I turn to look at her over my shoulder. She’s at the workbench, sorting through engine parts. Her eyes look up from beneath the canopy of her dark lashes and she gives me a shy smile.
I’m completely fucked.
Five
Raven
“Whoa, Rave, that’s the one. Get that one.” Eve points to the coral-colored string bikini. “That color will compliment your skin and make your eyes totally pop.”