“I wasn’t asking, Shelly,” he threatened without looking up.
“You’re being ridiculous.”
“You can do it willingly, or I can strap you to the chair and do what I want anyway.”
I struggled with my choices and realized I lacked an advantage or the words to convince him that what he was doing crossed too many lines.
The foolish teenage girl in me still hoped…
I quickly did as he ordered before he could see my tears. I rested my head against the soft leather in defeat and willed my body to keep still.
I drowned it all out.
The hum of the machine.
The feel of his hand.
The needle’s piercing vibration against my skin.
I let it all go for the past.
*
SIX YEARS AGO
“Are you afraid?”
It took me a moment to gather myself after he’d just gotten through kissing me senseless. We were in his bedroom with romantic music playing softly in the background. I had to admit that he was pulling out all the stops. A twinge of sadness and anger flowed through me as I remembered our recent but short breakup and why. I’d forgiven him, but the urge to beat the brakes off Jessica Stanton was still strong. She had been a friend, and the two of them had done the unthinkable when they made out at a party.
“A little. I’ve never done this before.” The cutest grin spread to his lips and eased some of my nervousness.
“You don’t know how happy that makes me.”
“Why? Because you’re damaged goods?”
“Ouch. That hurt.” He clutched his chest as if seriously wounded.
“Maybe this will help,” I whispered and quickly shed my dress before I lost the courage. I was surprised at how brazen I was even though it was all an act. His eyes boldly traveled every inch of my body, and I shivered from that contact alone.
“Are you sure you want to do this now? We can wait if you want.”
I nodded my head even as I crossed my arms over my breasts. I had turned sixteen the month before, and I felt I was as ready as I would ever be. “What better day than Valentine’s day?” I joked.
“Your wedding day,” he answered. His face turned down with guilt, and he backed away, but my hand shot out to stop him.
“I know. I was only kidding, but I want you now. I choose you. I choose this moment.”
“I don’t deserve you.”
“Well, I am pretty amazing.”
“I’m sorry, okay? It will never happen again. I don’t want to hurt you like that again.”
As much as I didn’t want to risk this night, I couldn’t hold back my feelings. “Why did you do it?”
His head fell forward and his shoulders shook as he gripped the sheets. I watched the veins in his hands bulge and stretch. “I wish I knew.”
*
PRESENT
He’d lied. After the first time, he hurt me much worse each time after. The pain yesterday didn’t heal with time. It only festered.
“Where did you go?” I felt myself being lifted until I was now sitting upright. I felt the soreness on my ass and looked down to see what he had done but found it wrapped.
“What?”
“Where did you go just now? You were as stiff as a board.”
“In my memories, Keenan. It’s my only comfort. What did you do to me?”
“I told… I needed to right a wrong.”
Realization hit, and I was left shaking with anger. “You tattooed your name again?”
“Not quite.”
“What. Did. You. Do?”
“I left a reminder of who you belonged to. It’s more for me really.”
“Your arrogance is unattractive.” I may have sounded petty, but it was all I had at the moment—short of killing him.
“Are you saying you don’t want me?”
“More or less.”
“Let’s test that theory out.” In one fluid motion, he flipped me over and had my shorts around my ankles.
“Is this how it’s going to be? I’m not your toy, Keenan.”
“No, baby. You’re not. You fuck too well to be a toy.” I could feel him peeling the wrap away from my ass. “Mine,” he growled and palmed me.
“You keep saying that.”
“I mean that’s what the tattoo is. It says ‘Mine.’”
“Please tell me you didn’t.” I attempted to stand up, but his hand on my back kept me in place.
“I did and I enjoyed.” He peeled down my panties with his thumb and kissed down my back.
Somehow, I found the strength I didn’t know I possessed.
“Keenan, let me go.” I turned my head to look into his eyes and let him see how serious I was. “I don’t want this.”
He stared at me frozen for so long that, for a moment, I didn’t think he would let me go. He shoved away from me and kicked away his chair until it banged into the wall violently. The next second, his fist flew into the glass frame nearby, and I watched in horror as it shattered and fell to the floor. Without a word, he stalked toward the back of the shop and disappeared behind a door.