chapter Eleven
Lara bit her lip at the expression on Jack’s face. He was shocked. She had horrified him by her rude and callous remark. Oh, Jack, I didn’t mean it. I only want you to love me…just a little. Say you love me.
“I think we’ll forget you ever said that,” he replied at last, moving toward her. “Are you tired?”
“Yes.”
He touched her arm and she flinched, immediately regretting her action when she saw the fleeting hurt in his eyes.
“Lara, we are both exhausted. It’s been a long and nerve-racking day. How about we just go to bed…to sleep.”
Almost sagging with relief, she nodded. He was right, as usual. She was exhausted. Every muscle ached with tiredness and tension. She would have a shower and lie in that bed and sleep. Glancing at the bed, she saw her nightdress, all lace and frills, arranged carefully across her pillow. It was a huge bed. They could sleep without touching. Besides, she could see her tiredness mirrored in his drawn face.
If she had found the day a trial, then what must it have been like for him a straight forward man who, today, had faced every royal protocol imaginable, plus meeting hundreds of strangers all of whom would have been surreptitiously analyzing him. He had handled everything with eloquence and dignity. She had been so proud of him, the handsome man who was now her husband.
“I can’t undo my dress. I’ll need to ring for a maid,” she said, reaching to pick up the telephone.
He placed a hand over hers, stopping the action. “No. You don’t need a maid, Your Highness. I’m quite capable of undoing a few buttons. Turn around.”
Obediently turning her back toward him, she closed her eyes at the light touch of his fingers against her neck as he undid the tiny pearl buttons.
“When we’re in Australia, you won’t have a personal maid waiting on you hand and foot, Lara.”
Was she being told off? She wasn’t sure. His voice was certainly aimed at putting her in her place.
“I’m quite happy to live without servants.”
“There’s a housekeeper and a gardener at my place in Port Margaret but other than that, I prefer to look after myself.”
As he finished undoing the buttons she turned, holding the dress in place over her breasts. “Well, good for you, Jack. Although, you might need to add one or two security people to your list, unless you’d like to pay out another billion dollars if I’m kidnapped.”
His expression was thoughtful as he studied her. “I look after my own,” he said, as he reached to touch the diamond necklace around her throat. “Did you like my present?”
She felt flustered. His scrutiny was unnerving and she was horribly embarrassed she hadn’t had chance to acknowledge his gift. “It’s beautiful. Thank you.”
“It matches your personality. Fire and ice, which are two of your many fascinations. And at the moment you are all fire and want to pick a fight with me, don’t you?” He smiled and she caught her breath at the wonderment of this magnificent man.
“Yes,” she admitted, moving a few steps away from him.
“You are still mad that you’ve had to marry me instead of some puffed up royal. You thought you would put me in my place, as befits a commoner like me, when you challenged me to have sex with you.”
“I…I didn’t.” Lara floundered, unable to form the words to reply to such an accusation.
“But, my beautiful wife, I’m quite happy to bide my time no matter how long it takes. So, you can stand there and argue with yourself for all I care. I’m going to have a shower and go to bed.”
She managed to close her gaping mouth as he stripped off his clothes down to his underwear and disappeared into one of the bathrooms. Moments later, she heard the sound of the shower.
Well, that’s that, she thought, pulling off the heavy wedding gown and carefully hanging it in the walk-in robe. He didn’t want to argue with her—he didn’t want to make love to her—he wanted to sleep. Fair enough.
She took her time in her bathroom allowing the hot water to pummel away at her tense body as she reflected on her wedding. What a day it had been. She supposed it was what every young woman dreamed of and yet it had passed in a blur as she had made every endeavor to look happy and relaxed. It had certainly been different. She dried her hair and then spent time brushing the long, heavy tresses allowing them to lie around her shoulders in a golden cloud. Slipping into the lacy nightdress, she studied herself critically in the mirror. Yes, she had all the trappings of a bride on her wedding night, except for the pale face and faint shadows under her eyes. She patted her cheeks to add some color.
Nervously, she opened the door to the bedroom and almost laughed aloud. So much for worrying what Jack might think of how she looked. He was already asleep, the covers drawn neatly up to his chin.
She tiptoed closer and peered at him. In repose, his face looked much younger. Dark eyelashes protected her from that blue gaze and his sensual mouth was relaxed, inviting. She turned off the bedside lamp and making her way around the bed, pulled back the covers and climbed in. He didn’t stir. Staring into the darkness, Lara determinedly swallowed the lump forming in her throat and waited for sleep to overcome her.
~ * ~
She was warm and comfortable as she stretched against a man’s body, her cheek resting against a firm chest. Not any man, but her husband. Going very still, she listened to his quiet breathing. He was still asleep but at sometime in the night, he’d wrapped an arm around her and was cradling her. Oh, it was so good. A faint light from the window told her it was nearly dawn and in a few hours, they would be on their way to Australia and her new life.
She hesitated and then pressed closer to him, her hand lightly examining his chest and the sprinkling of dark hair beneath her probing fingers. She followed the hairline down to his waist and then stilled. He was naked. Her heart pounded as she daringly slid her hand over his flat abdomen and then gently encircled his sex.
She jumped as his hand grasped hers. “You’re playing with fire, sweetheart,” he said softly, his voice rumbling in her ear.
“I want that fire,” she replied, her lips against him, savoring the texture and clean smell of his skin.
She was aware of his tension. Please don’t deny me this time. I’m your wife, your very virginal wife. She pulled the nightdress over her head as Jack turned on the lamp. They stared at each other and she could see the desire blazing in his eyes as he lowered his gaze to her breasts.
Drawing the sheet further from her, he seemed to drink his fill of her naked body. Under his gaze, her nipples hardened and her breasts swelled in anticipation of his lovemaking. Jack’s hand reached out and began to caress her, dwelling on her waist and the flare of her hip. He moved closer and slid his hand between her thighs, resting there, not moving.
She responded and stroked his strong jaw line and traced the outline of his sensual mouth. She wanted that mouth on her breasts, sucking and licking her. She wanted him so badly.
As if he had read her mind, he bent his head, capturing one nipple in his mouth and teasing it with his tongue. She gasped as the sensation spiraled through her body to her very core. Almost as if he sensed her every emotion, Jack drew her breast deep into his hot mouth and suckled her…hard. She held his dark head to her as she fought to breathe, her passion overtaking any other thought.
She didn’t know how to tell him what she wanted, but he knew. He slid down her body and pushed her thighs apart placing his mouth on her sex, his tongue moving on the sensitive nub.
“Jack. Oh, Jack.” Whether she cried out or not, she didn’t care as she was overcome with the sensation of her orgasm. She grasped his head as his tongue continued to caress her pulsating sex until her trembling had stopped.
He kissed his way up her stomach and stopped to once again suckle her breasts then looked into her eyes. “You are unbelievably responsive,” he grinned, his delight obvious.
She covered his face in a flurry of kisses. “I want you inside me, Jack.” Moving her hips, she felt his arousal pressing against her stomach.
“Shall I use protection?”
She shook her head. “I want your baby,” she whispered and was gratified at the look of satisfaction on his face.
His finger inside her gently massaged her already sensitive nub and she jerked involuntarily against him, not believing she could experience such longing. “I need you, Jack,” she encouraged and he moved over her. She grasped his sex, guiding it into her and tensed at his great size.
“Am I hurting you?” He hesitated but she immediately pushed against him, the brief stab of pain ending her virginal state forever.
“No. I love it,” she said, making Jack laugh.
“You are beautiful, my princess,” he murmured, suddenly serious as he pushed again and then again until he had fully entered her. He waited for a moment then began smooth, rhythmic thrusts into her welcoming warmth.
She couldn’t answer. She had to be in heaven, she thought, concentrating on the wonderment of Jack as her muscles stretched to accommodate him. No one had ever told her making love would be like this. It was the sun and moon and stars rolled into one.
She caught his rhythm, moving with him and urging him on. His hands cupped her bottom pulling her tightly into him as he thrust harder and faster, his breath coming in great gasps. She arched again as her climax took hold, and clung to his shoulders, sobbing as waves of ecstasy flowed over her.
“Ah, Lara!” His shout echoed as he came seconds later, filling her with his seed. She held his shaking body, loving the feel of his sweat-slicked skin and the sound of his heart hammering against hers.
“I’m almost speechless,” she said as she slowly recovered in his arms.
He pulled her closer. “I’ve waited so long for you. I think we may have made six babies just then.”
She laughed with the pure joy of his lovemaking. “You are certainly a very physical man, Jack Lucas,” she replied.
“You’d better believe it. And now we have broken the ice, so to speak, I shall want you at least a dozen times a day.”
“Even though you don’t love me?” There. She’d said those dreaded words. She had to spoil everything. She hadn’t meant to—she couldn’t help herself.
“You don’t love me either, do you?” came the smooth response. He didn’t wait for her to reply but said, “This is a physical thing, Lara. It is the pleasure we gain from creating sensations for each other to enjoy.”
“Meaning, any woman could do?”
“Don’t analyze everything. We have lusted after one another from the moment we met. Physically, we are very compatible. We have just proved it, but I don’t intend to spend our honeymoon being quizzed by you over impossible emotions.”
Impossible emotions. So that’s what he called it. She had heard that many men were like Jack. As long as they could have sex when they wanted it, to hell with other emotions such as love, commitment, caring.
Jack touched her face and she turned her head and pressed a kiss into his palm. Perhaps he cared for her, she didn’t know. He was such an attractive man and she didn’t believe physically they would have problems. The fact that her parents had, in effect, arranged this marriage didn’t matter to her anymore. All that concerned her was that he could learn to love her as his wife and the mother of the children they would have.
Right now, she wanted this man again. She wanted him to recreate those wonderful sensations within her. Leaning toward him, she brushed her breasts across his chest. “Would you like me again?” she asked with a cheeky smile.
“You know I would, little devil.”
“I want you to teach me everything about sex, Jack. Everything.”
He placed his hands around her waist and lifted her so she sat astride him, looking down into his face. “You flatter me, sweetheart,” he said, maneuvering so he could enter her, causing her to gasp in surprise.
“Oh, Jack,” she murmured, widening her eyes as he pulled her hips tightly against him, at the same time thrusting into her, then lifted her from him to repeat the movement again and again as her strong, internal muscles tightened around him.
“Oh, Lara,” he mimicked, his thumbs rubbing her sensitive nipples.
She moved against him, taking control of the rhythm and of Jack and laughed in delight as he groaned under her teasing. When his passion took over, he left her breathless as with several fierce thrusts, he reached his climax. She flung her head back as she reveled in his pleasure.
~ * ~
Dear Diary,
We’re on our way to Australia in Jack’s plane. He is in the conference area making business calls, and I’m using this chance to catch up with you. I’m sorry I’ve missed a few days, but things have been pretty hectic.
My wedding is over and honestly, someone must have slipped me a Valium, because it passed in a complete haze. HMs are ecstatic, and Jack’s parents were very happy at the outcome as well. He has paid for them to have a second honeymoon in Europe.
The most important thing is that I’ve lost my virginity at last and how! It was the most wonderful experience of my life, and I can’t get enough of him. I’m constantly on fire for him and he must feel the same way as he can barely keep his hands off me.
The saddest thing is that from his point of view, it’s pure lust. From the beginning, he wanted me, while I know I love him. I could never let another man touch me and yet he could probably have sex with another woman and think nothing of it. I can’t bear to think about it.
We’re going to Port Margaret where he says we will have some meaningful talks. I don’t quite know what that will involve. I only wish he loved me and we could be like a normal couple.
“What are you writing?”
Lara hastily closed her journal as Jack stood in the aisle looking down at her. “It’s private.”
He shrugged and sat next to her. She was extraordinary, his beautiful wife. Quiet and shy one moment and the next, fiery and argumentative. He still couldn’t pick her true personality. What he did know, to his absolute delight, was how passionate she was. There was no shyness involved in that regard, and he had been intoxicated with her from when they had first made love that morning as the dawn had broken.
Worried that she might be sore with such sudden sexual activity, he had run a bath filling it with oils and bubbles he’d found in the huge marble bathroom. She had drifted back to sleep and he had picked her up and gently placed her in the warm, perfumed water. She had stretched languidly and then held out her arms to him.
“Come in, the water’s fine,” she had joked and he’d watched the bubbles clinging to her rounded breasts as she moved. He hadn’t needed to be asked twice as he joined her, and she was instantly in his arms.
“I’ve never done it in a bath,” she whispered, stroking the bubbles across his chest.
“Well, of course you haven’t,” he replied, hardening with desire as she floated against him.
“Do you still want me a dozen times a day?” She pressed her lips against his.
“Well, this will be number three today and it’s not even seven o’clock in the morning,” he murmured, his hands moving over her slick, wet body. “Seriously, Lara. You could become very sore.”
“We’ll have a rest…after this,” she said. He’d been unable to resist her, and hadn’t wanted to, as he pulled her on to his lap.
“Did you finish all your calls,” she asked politely as he brought his mind back to the present with difficulty.
“Pretty well. But next week there’s an important meeting in Sydney, which I’ll need to attend.”
“I’ll come with you, if you like.”
She slipped her hand into his, and he studied his gold ring on her slender finger. He wanted her with him. He wanted her with him every moment.
“I have an apartment in Sydney overlooking the Harbor Bridge. I think you’ll like it.” His throat tightened with unknown emotion. Was this what it was like to be in love? To want to share everything with your wife? Why hadn’t he experienced this with his ex? Probably that was why their marriage hadn’t lasted. They’d never really loved each other. But what did it matter when Lara didn’t love him? Sure, she was enjoying this new sexy adventure but it would wear thin. She had already mentioned ending their relationship. Barely married and she had talked of separation. That had hurt him. He would never let her go and allow another man to have her. Never.
“I know so little about you, Jack.” She interlaced her fingers with his. “I don’t know about your work, or your family and friends. I don’t know what you have planned for our future.”
He turned to her and to his dismay, her eyes filled with tears. She bent her head but he’d seen her weakness and it tore him apart to see her agony.
And it was his fault.
He brushed away a wayward tear from her cheek with his thumb and then cradled her against him, gently kissing her forehead. “It’s not the right place to talk about such matters here where we might be overheard. As I said, when we get home to Port Margaret, we’re going to talk and plan our future to suit us both.”
It sounded reasonable and logical the way he’d phrased it. They did need to sort things out. He hoped to hell he could persuade her she could be happy with him.
“We’ll be in Australia in about nine hours. How about we go to bed?” He buried his lips into her sweet-smelling hair.
She looked up, and he knew his desire for her was written in his eyes. He couldn’t, and didn’t want to disguise it. She was everything he had ever wanted in a woman.
“I’d like that,” she replied. “I guess I must be pregnant by now but it’s a very enjoyable way of making sure.”
She reached for her bag and made her way along the aisle to the bedroom at the back of the plane. Jack followed, his thoughts spinning around in his head. These odd, throwaway lines of hers didn’t seem to fit. This wasn’t the real Lara. Or was he totally misunderstanding the situation with her waiting to have his baby to fulfill her part of their contract, so she could leave him?
~ * ~
“It’s a beautiful home, Jack.” She looked out of the huge windows that ran the length of the house which was set high above the bay in Port Margaret.
“I like it. It’s a bit smaller than your palace, but still…”
She decided to ignore that remark. “The sea is very rough today. Is it an autumn storm coming in?” She jumped as a great gust of wind rattled against the panes of glass. Jack stood behind her, and she leaned back enjoying the protective feel of his arms around her.
“It’s forecast to be stormy today and fine tomorrow. I don’t have a fleet of boats out at present, so I’m not too concerned.”
“Have you been out in weather like this?” She turned to look up at him, noticing his eyes narrow as they swept the horizon.
“Yes, many times. Before I returned to Challoner, I went out for a week and worked a session with the tuna cowboys.”
She turned back to the window, covering his hands with hers where they encircled her waist. “I don’t know what that means.”
“We work under water in diving suits driving big catches of tuna into huge holding pens, and then the ship gradually tows them several hundred miles into shore, where they go into fish farms. The trouble is, sometimes sharks follow the tuna in and break the nets so we have to drive them away and mend the nets. If we lose the catch, then we also lose around two million dollars. It’s dangerous but pretty exciting.”
Lara shuddered and his arms tightened around her. She continued to stare at the pounding sea as she said, “You could have been killed.”
“Then you wouldn’t have needed to marry me.” Jack laughed as he twirled her around to face him and then hesitated as he registered her distressed expression. He said more gently, “It’s part of what I do, Lara. Who I am. I’m a fisherman first and a businessman second.”
Her eyes sparked into his as she grasped the lapels of his jacket. “No. You’re my husband first and the father of the baby we will have. How can you be as uncaring as to what might happen to you?”
“Don’t try and change me, Lara. I will always take care of you and if you have a baby, I will love and take care of our child.” He appeared puzzled by her outburst.
“I want you to love me, Jack. You said you would love our child. I want to be loved too.”
His brilliant eyes studied her as he analyzed what she’d said. She waited, her heart in her mouth. At last she had the courage to bring this into the open. She mustn’t fail now. She had to know.
“I care for you, Lara.”
She pushed him away. “That’s not good enough. I want more.”
“What if I can’t give you more?”
“Then our marriage will be over.” She flung her head back as she stared at him. “I love you, Jack Lucas. I love you, and I’ll accept nothing less in return.”