“No, it wasn’t. I obviously can’t relate to your situation, however, if I had to, I couldn’t imagine the feelings and the emotions that would flood through me. I’m sure one of them would be self-consciousness. But just because you have a prosthetic leg doesn’t change who you are on the inside, and yesterday, I saw what you are capable of on the outside, so please know that your leg is not a concern for me at all.”
He smirks at me again and takes his hat off, running his fingers through his messy hair.
“Well, here we are,” I tell him, parking in front of the condo. It looks almost identical to the last one. I grab my phone and open my email to retrieve the lockbox code. Walking up to the door, I glance at Nate and watch him looking all around with his hands in his pockets. I punch the code in and grab the key. Opening the front door, we walk inside and it is literally the same as the first place.
“I cannot believe it’s actually identical!” he exclaims.
“Right? The only difference, I’d say, would be there’s more natural light in here, which is not a bad thing.”
I take my time showing Nate around for two reasons. This is the house for Nate and I want him to see that, but also this will be the last time that we get to do this together. However, the smile that is on his face tells me that he loves it and that is ultimately why I do what I do.
As we come back to the front door to exit, something is telling me not to leave, but Nate opens the door and I walk out, ignoring my gut. He follows and I lock up.
“So, what do you think? Are you ready to make this your home?”
He nods his head. “Yeah, definitely. I can’t wait to tell my mom. She’s going to be so happy.”
We both get into my car and I reach for my work bag, but it’s not in here. “Do you have time to stop by my office? I don’t have a contract on me.”
“Yeah, of course,” he responds. “If you have time, maybe we could grab a bite to eat, too?”
My stomach tightens from his offer. As much as I try and fight it because of my own insecurities, I can’t. All I really want to do is spend time with him.
My insides are gnawing at me. I find myself wanting to keep looking over at Nate as we drive to my office, wondering if I should tell him what I’m feeling. I’ve tried fighting it and it’s not going away. Maybe honesty is what both of us need.
“You okay?” he asks, as if sensing my inner turmoil.
“Yeah. Yeah, why?”
“You’ve gone quiet on me.”
“I’m good, I promise. I’m just thinking about a lot of things and let my mind slip away.” So maybe I’m not as ready for that honesty as I thought I was.
“Okay, you know I’m here if you want to talk about anything.”
“Thank you, and believe me, I appreciate that. We do need to talk about your offer on this place.” Chickenshit that I am, of course I deflect to the safe subjects.
We discuss the details for the condo and what he’s willing to pay on the drive. Then turning into my office, I park and just before we get out, anxiety hits me full speed. Jaquelle and Alex exit, all lovey with each other.
Without even thinking, I place my hand on Nate’s arm to stop him. He looks down at my hand first, then at me. “Wha…?”
But I cut him off, not letting him get any further. My lips crash hard against his, and right away, he accepts me, kissing me back.
His hand moves to the back of my head, if only to bring us closer. Leaning over the center console of my car, I hold on to his bicep, and he kisses me with so much passion that I know I am no longer controlling what I started, and I give in to him, forgetting that Alex and that whore could be watching us right now. Because being in this moment with Nate is so much more than I expected. His lips are so soft yet dominating. He knows what he wants and I like that. His scent, being this close to him, drives me mad. I’d take off all my clothes right here if he wanted me to. That’s the power he has over me. It’s both exhilarating and terrifying.
As he slows the kiss, I am dazed and under his spell. We rest our foreheads against each other and he rubs my bottom lip with his thumb. “What took you so long?” he asks.
I can’t help but give him his trademark smirk. How do I say why I kissed him without hurting his feelings? I don’t think there is a way, so it’s probably going to be better left unsaid. But deep down, I’d only be bullshitting myself. I’ve been wrestling with my feelings for Nate, and seeing my ex just pushed me. It pushed me to make a move, a move that he clearly accepted and liked. There’s no harm in that…is there?
“I could ask you the same thing.”
“I didn’t want to jeopardize our professional relationship.”
“I respect that.” Looking around, Alex and Jaquelle are gone. “Clearly, we have a lot to talk about. Let’s go make an offer on your new home and then lunch?”
“Can I offer either of you any dessert?” the waitress asks us.
I shake my head and Nate answers her, “No, thanks.”
“So you were gone for almost a year?” I ask him, stunned by the harrowing details of him being a POW.
“Yeah.”
“I bet you were so happy to get home,” I tell him.