I didn’t respond.
She couldn’t possibly understand what it was like knowing that you could bring about the end to the person you loved. Only Nyla and Rudyard could understand that and they weren’t here. Rainer had the luxury of being able to look at it from the outside. She’d been around for hundreds of years, seen Grigori come and go, all simply casualties of war. She probably wouldn’t hesitate to use the added power that came with being bonded soulmates, but then, she wasn’t taking into account all of the other realities that were a part of it. She couldn’t begin to imagine.
Despite Rainer’s encouragement, I still had my doubts – and anxieties – about visiting Evelyn and Dad. But as I loitered in the halls I thought about all the reasons why this was important – why confiding in Evelyn and having her opinion could make all the difference. In the end, it was the image of the child I’d seen Phoenix take off with that forced my decision. We were running out of time.
It was a task just to get through all of the security on the lower level until I was permitted into the holding cells.
I’m not sure what I’d expected, maybe jail cells, but Evelyn and Dad had been given something more like a small apartment. They had been allowed to share the same space – two single beds, which had been shoved close together. They had a small kitchenette with a good supply of fruit and vegetables – probably prison enough for Dad, who preferred his vegetables to come in a Chinese takeaway box and covered in oyster sauce.
The only thing that screamed lock-down was that the entire area was contained within some type of barely visible force field that reminded me of the liquid-like wall that divided Phoenix and me in my dream. I could see everything except for a small cubicle I assumed concealed their bathroom. At least they’d been given some privacy.
I walked down the narrow white corridor, alongside their cell. Dad and Evelyn were sitting at a small oval table, playing cards. They both looked up and saw me at the same time and I was struck by the weirdness of it all. The Academy, Grigori, Hell, Lilith, Lincoln, Phoenix, the Scriptures – and there were my parents, playing blackjack in an impenetrable box. It took me a moment to realise I was laughing hysterically.
Maybe they thought it would be good therapy, or were just pleased to see me, but within seconds, the parents I’d been so nervous about seeing for the last two and a half weeks burst out laughing too.
Just what every kid wants, right? Happy family moments.
As we all sobered, one of the guards patted me down, taking my dagger from me. He looked at my wrist markings with a puzzled expression. Normally, they would ask Grigori to remove their wristbands.
I turned my wrists up and smiled. ‘Sorry. Permanent.’
He grunted and then surprised me by opening a door in the force field.
‘Is it solid?’ I asked.
He shrugged. ‘In a way. But it’s charged by Grigori power, which makes it more, and less.’
‘Like the walkways?’
He gestured me into the room. ‘Similar,’ he said, shutting down the line of questioning. He wasn’t going to tell me any more.
‘Ten minutes,’ the guard said, with a look that said he’d be timing me. Griffin had called in a bunch of favours to arrange the full-access visitation.
I stepped in and watched, as the door seemed to reseal behind me. Once the guard left the area, I took a seat at the table with my parents. I observed them both. Dad looked tired but otherwise fine. Evelyn looked terrible. Her eyes were dark and she had bruises up and down her arms. I suspected her elbows on the table were there to help hold her up more than the cards.
Griffin had warned me that the Academy had been putting her through the wringer, testing her both mentally and physically. I felt a surge of rage and it surprised me to realise I’d stopped thinking of this woman as my enemy.
But what does that make us now?
‘Violet, I’ve missed you … We’ve missed you so much. I can’t begin to tell you how sorry I am for what happened. I am so ashamed. I can’t ask for your forgiveness but I …’
‘Dad,’ I said before he could ramble any more. ‘It’s okay.’ I shook my head, at myself more than anything. I’d been a fool. Sitting there in front of Dad put everything into perspective. ‘Trust me, I’ve done and said a lot of things I wish I could take back recently. You had a huge amount lumped on you all at once and you made a mistake.’ I glanced at Evelyn. ‘I think I’ve made my fair share of those and it might be time we all started letting some of them go. And … I’ve missed you, too.’
Dad nodded quickly and looked away.
I rolled my eyes. ‘Don’t cry, Dad.’
He turned back to me, eyes wet, and smiled. ‘I’m just … I’m so scared and so proud. I don’t know how to be the father in this world.’