Another chuckle rolled off my tongue, and I tapped Kallie’s button nose. “Not sure it’s considered a surprise party if you plan it yourself, Little Bug.”
That precious nose scrunched up with confusion, before an idea clicked. “How ’bout you plan one for me, Baz?” she asked. Caramel eyes went wide with their hopeful plea.
There was nothing entitled or assuming about it. It was all awe and hope and imagination.
Yep, I was completely and utterly fucked.
Owned.
Hoped to God I wasn’t supposed to be resisting all the cuteness, because it was just not gonna happen. Figured there were all kinds of rules set in place about not spoiling a kid rotten, but there wasn’t one bratty bone in Kallie Marie Bentley.
She was an untamed, fiery ball of pure sweetness.
Guileless.
Genuine.
Sincere.
Guess she got that from her mother, too.
Like I had to think really hard about it, I twisted my face up in contemplation. “Hmm…I don’t know.”
Anticipation had her clasping her hands again, and she pressed them up under her chin, those tiny teeth exposed as a bright smile split her face. “Oh please, oh please. I’ll be so, so good and listen to every’fing you and Momma tell me!”
I broke out in a grin. “In that case, I think maybe something can be arranged.”
“Yes!” she squealed. Excitement blazed from her, her entire being lighting up like a sudden burst of sunshine.
Basking me in it.
Pretty sure that was going to be the best damned party this town had ever seen.
She danced around on the counter some more, going right back to singing her song and dousing the bread in so much garlic salt I was sure Shea and I were going to be choking it down.
Two and a half weeks had passed since we’d got her back. We’d settled into a routine. That routine basically meant me spending every waking second I possibly could with them. Every sleeping second, too. Binging on their time, feeding and fueling myself for the time when my life was going to call me away.
But this time?
This time it’d be done with the promise I’d be back, no matter how long the shit in my life stole them from me.
When she’d first got home, it’d taken a couple of days for Kallie to really begin to relax and start acting like her normal self again. The first week she’d had a couple nightmares.
Fuck, they’d been one of the most heartbreaking scenes I’d ever seen.
Shea had asked her gentle questions, never pressuring her, but always encouraging her to open up. To talk and get it out rather than holding her fear inside. Promising any secret she needed to tell would forever be safe with us.
Still blew my mind Shea trusted me with all of it. With her daughter. With the care, effort, and love that went into it.
Raising her.
Neither of us had stated or uttered it aloud, though we both knew well enough that’s what was happening. I’d slipped into the role like I’d been purposed to do it all along.
Taking on Kallie as my own.
Did I still worry? Wonder if my being a part of their lives was only going to drag them down? Cause them more pain and suffering?
Hell yeah.
Every fucking second.
I guess I just worried more about what their lives might look like without me in it.
Or maybe it was just my own selfishness and greed that had me here, refusing to let them go.
But in moments like these? When I was here with Kallie, making her smile, being a partner to Shea, someone there to support and bolster and ease?
I had to believe I had more to offer. Believe everything Shea saw in me was real. Who I could really be. That maybe I could be better than all the shit I’d allowed to run my life for too many years.
Shea was right.
It was a choice.
And I was choosing them.
One of the only comforts we’d had in the whole situation was that bastard Jennings hadn’t been around much while he’d held Kallie at that house. As Kallie had started feeling comfortable enough to begin telling stories, divulging little bits of what’d gone down, it became clear the old lady who’d answered the door was the one who’d done all the caretaking.