Down and Out

Savannah hasn’t said a single word the whole ride home, and I’m in full-fledged panic mode. Her silence is even more terrifying than her yelling at me. At least with yelling, I know where I stand. But this. . . I have no clue where her head’s at. I’m scared to death she’s gonna tell me it’s over before we’ve even had a chance to really begin.
Pulling into the gym’s parking lot, she reaches for the door as soon as I put the car in park. I grab her arm to keep her from leaving, because something tells me that once she does, I’ve lost her forever.
“Can’t we talk about this?”
Her eyes are hard as they meet mine. “You want to talk about it? All right. How was she? Hmm? How’d it feel to f*ck her?”
I shake my head in disbelief, staring at the red bricks through the windshield. I can’t believe she went there. But if this is how she wants to play it, then fine. I look her square in the eye and say, “It was okay. But I know it’d be shit compared to you.”
She laughs. “Well, you’re never gonna find out now. That ship has sailed, buddy.”
“I don’t think it has.”
Her brows lift as she leans back against the door, crossing her arms. “Oh, yeah? Why’s that?”
“Because you wouldn’t be arguing with me right now if it had. You’d have gotten out of this car and gone upstairs, and nothing I said or did would’ve stopped you. You’re pissed off because you care, because I hurt you. And for that, I’m really sorry. It’s the last thing I’d ever want to do, and I’d never purposely do it.”
Savannah’s mouth closes as her eyes drop. “Why her? I mean, how could you—” Her eyes squeeze shut, like she’s in pain, and it hurts me, because I know I’m the source of it.
I’d do anything to take it back, but I can’t.
“Never mind,” she says, shaking her head. “That’s a stupid question. She’s got two very big, very obvious reasons why you’d be with her.”
I want to tell her that she’s wrong, but she’s not. I sure as hell wasn’t with Jamie for her personality.
She squints her eyes as she studies me. “Is that the kind of girl you like? Because, newsflash: my ‘reasons’ are a little more subtle.”
Scowling, I mutter, “I like your tits just the way they are, okay?”
A scoff catches in her throat as her eyes widen, and it takes me a second to realize what I said. When I do, I hang my head.
I can’t believe I just said that. And I can’t believe we’re even having this conversation. “This is ridiculous.”
“It is. So why are you even bothering with me? I’m nothing like—”
“I know you’re not.” My voice rises as I interrupt her. “You’re nothing like the girls I usually go for. You’re stubborn and mean,” I say, chuckling. “God, you can be mean. But I like that about you. I like this,” I say, gesturing back and forth between us. “I like fighting with you. I like that you make me work for it. And the mouth on you. . . I f*cking love it. I love your sass and your wit, and I love that you’re not afraid to tell me to f*ck off.”
This earns me an eye roll and a lip-biting smile and I’m sitting here grinning like an idiot. I brush a lock of hair behind her ear and continue. “And even though you can be a real pain in the ass, you’re also gorgeous and possibly the strongest person I’ve ever met. But there’s a vulnerability about you that’s just . . . beautiful, and real. I’m in awe of you, Savannah.”
She swallows, her gaze dipping down to my lips, and I see it—that spark of heat igniting her eyes.
Before I can talk myself out of it, I pull her to me and crush my mouth to hers, our hands and breaths frantic as the kiss consumes us. I’m absolutely and irrevocably f*cked, because she tastes better than anything I’ve ever had in my mouth and she kisses like a dream. It’s the perfect amount of soft lips and warm, wet caresses, and when she sucks my lip ring into her mouth, I feel it all the way down south, in a certain appendage that’s now syphoning off all my blood.
I groan and drag her across my lap until she’s straddling me, her ass hitting the horn as I pin her between me and the steering wheel. Her hands cup my face as her tongue dances with mine, my fingers running up the sides of her bare legs. I’m amazed at how soft and smooth her skin is, and I just want to lick and kiss every inch of her, until I’ve memorized her taste.
I push her skirt up to her hips, feeling the lace of her panties as I push them aside and slip my fingers into smooth, wet folds. “Goddamn, Kitten.” My head dips to the hollow of her neck as I strain against my jeans.
I’m so hard you could take my pulse with my cock.
My fingers circle her sensitive flesh before I push inside her, making her breath catch. Jesus, I love that sound. But you know what I love more? The way her hips are rocking against me. She’s riding my fingers, and it’s the. Hottest. Thing. Ever.
I’m about half a second away from blowing my load inside my boxers when she kisses me between panting breaths, her hands reaching between us to frantically unbutton my jeans.
Oh, God, yes.
I leave her tight heat and reach over to the glove box while she unzips me. My fingers fumble around until I touch a plastic square and yank it out. She pulls back, her eyes glued to my hips as I lift up slightly and push everything down. Her breath hitches as my cock springs free.
There’s no room for modesty or embarrassment, not when she’s looking at me so hungrily, like she just wants to consume me. She licks her lips and I have to bite back a grin, because she probably doesn’t even realize she did it.
The sight of her watching me so openly, so appreciatively, only makes me harder and my already big ego swells to ten times its size. I know I’m blessed endowment-wise, but this just makes me feel like a god among men.
I rip open the condom wrapper with my teeth and roll it down my shaft in record time. She lifts herself and hovers over me as I reach between us, lining us up. Her big, gray eyes never leave mine as I guide her down, sinking myself deep inside her.
We both groan as I fill her to the hilt. The thin layer of latex does nothing to lessen the feel of her tight heat wrapped around me. She feels like heaven.
She feels like home.
Leaning down, she cradles my face in her delicate hands and plants a soft kiss on my lips. Then she does something that rocks my world to its core and forever alters me: she starts to move.
F*ck me, if I thought this was heaven before. . .
My hands clamp down on her hips, stilling her. Pulling back, she looks at me questioningly and the edges of my mouth crook up. Clearly, she’s forgotten about my . . . conditions.
“Beg me,” I say.
Her eyes roll as her head dips forward, touching mine. “You gotta be f*cking kidding me.”
My tongue darts out and teases her lips. “I’m serious as a heart attack, Kitten. I need to hear you say it.”
“No, you want to hear me say it.”
I shrug. She’s not wrong, but that’s only part of it.
She clenches around me and I groan. How can she make something I’ve had a thousand times feel so much more incredible than anyone else? “That’s not fair.”
Her teeth nibble on her lip. “I never said I play fair.”
In one quick movement, I’ve got her back pressed against the steering wheel and my left forearm draped across her hips, pinning her in place. She’s pushing against the horn and it’s blaring in the desolate parking lot, but I only vaguely notice.
Reaching between us, my free hand rubs slow, lazy circles around her slick skin. She groans and tries wiggle free, her hip bones straining against my forearm.
“That’s not fair,” she breathes.
“Turnabout is always fair.” My fingers capture her in a “V” as I work my hand back and forth.
Her breath leaves her on a shudder. She groans and bites her lip, grinning down at me. “F*ck you.”
She has teeth marks on her pretty lip and I smile up at her, dying to taste her while I thrust deep inside her. “I’m trying.”
I roll my hips under her and press a little harder with my fingers. Her breath catches as she grips my biceps, and then I just stop—stop touching her, stop my slow, torturous thrusts.
Her eyes pinch shut. “Nonono, keep going.”
I can’t help but smile at her desperation, because it feels damn good to know that I’ve worked her into this much of a frenzy. “Say it.”
She’s trying to thrash under me, but she’s pinned in place. Her nails are digging into me so hard that I know she’s breaking skin, but I don’t care.
“It’s just one little word. I’ll even give you a hint, okay? It starts with a ‘p.’”
Her brow arches playfully as she clenches around me again. “p-ssy?”
“Damn it, woman.” My eyes squeeze shut as I pulse inside her and huff out a frustrated breath. I will not give in. Not until I hear the word leave her mouth.
When I look back at her, it’s in earnest. The humor, my swagger, it’s all gone. I’m laid bare before her and it’s terrifying. “Say it. I need to know you want this just as much as I do. I need to know what I’m feeling isn’t completely one-sided. I need. . .”
You. This. Us.
“I need it, Savannah, more than I need my next breath.” This feeling trying to suffocate me from the inside out transcends “like,” and even though I’ve never felt it before, I know exactly what it is and what it means.
It means I’ll forever be at the mercy of the girl before me, because she took my heart. Stole it right from me.
She stills, the fight and rebellion dimming in her as sure as if it were a light bulb. Sighing, her hands ease off my arms and rest on my shoulders. “I don’t know what I’m feeling. It’s intense and confusing and scary, but it’s also wonderful and . . . thrilling. I’m not ready to let it go, but I’m also not ready to let it grow. Does that make sense?”
I search her eyes as she looks down at me, taking note of the tiniest flecks of silver in their gray depths. “Yeah. I can work with that.”
Leaning down, her forehead grazes mine. “I’m sorry I can’t give you a better answer. Just know that I don’t want anyone else the way I want you. It’s not even close. So please, Declan, I’m begging you . . . move,” she says, squeezing her walls around me as she tries to rock her hips.
Yes, ma’am.
Gripping her waist, I pull her up and bring her bring her back down, making both of us bite our lips as I push inside her. We settle into a steady rhythm and I lean her back, getting a good look at where we’re connected.
“F*ck,” I hiss, sliding her along my cock. I sear the image of her perfect, pink folds into my mind and let my head fall back, reveling in the feeling of her enveloping me completely.
Savannah rocks her hips in time with my thrusts. I leave her waist and roam under her shirt, running my hands up her stomach. I can feel her muscles flex and contract as she moves atop me, riding me, and oh, sweet Jesus, is she doing a good job.
Her breasts are swaying in front of me, almost eye-level. They’re taunting me with every roll of her hips, begging me to play with them, and I reach up, cupping the soft flesh through the flimsy fabric of her bra. My thumb traces her nipple, making her legs shake as her walls tighten around me.
She’s close, I can feel it.
My teeth grit together as I grab her hips and slam her down, thrusting up to meet her while trying to stave off the orgasm I feel rapidly building. She feels too good for me to hold out much longer and my muscles tense as I try.
I want her to come more than I want my own release. I need it. I need to feel it. I need to know that I can make her come.
Her eyes lock on mine, her lips parted in ecstasy as I move within her, and in this moment, I realize just how far I’ve fallen for this girl. She takes my face in her hands as her soft lips graze mine, our breaths mixing in a frenzied rush. My heart tries to beat through the emotion clogging me. It feels like I’m choking, but in the best way possible.
My eyes close as I lean my head against her. “Nothing will ever be better than this.” The words are nothing more than a harsh utterance against her chest as my fingers dig into her hips, roughly grinding her against me in the cramped space. “Nothing.”
I feel her nod in agreement as she wraps her arms around my neck, rocking with me. A breathy moan brushes my ear, making my eyes squeeze shut even tighter as I’m all but shoved over the edge. My balls tighten as my orgasm starts to barrel through me, and I pray that my jerky movements won’t ruin her momentum.
Her lips kiss my cheek as she breathes my name against my skin, her walls tightening like a vise around me. She gasps as she holds on to me, the tension slowly leaving her body until she’s putty in my hands.
Hearing my favorite sound in the whole world makes me groan, and I grip her hips, burying my face in her neck as I grind her against me and spill inside her. My heart gallops as I slow my thrusts, her weight settling atop me as I kiss her jaw, her neck, her collarbone—basically anything my lips can reach. We cling to each other, sweaty and sated as we float back to Earth in my fogged-up car.
“Holy shit,” I gasp, giving her a slow, lazy grin as she leans back. “That was—”
Heavy guitars blare from my pocket somewhere underneath her and I curse under my breath. But I couldn’t give a shit about the phone call right now, not when Savannah’s face clouds over like that as she lifts herself off me and slides back into her seat.
My heart seizes in my chest as I watch her retract back into herself, her walls sliding up right in front of me.
Shit, did I do something wrong? Was it something I said?
I jerk my pants up over my hips and the used condom I’m still wearing, prepared to f*cking chase her down if need be. She’s not getting out of this that easily, and not until she’s told me what the hell just changed, because something did.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” I say as she grabs her heels from the floorboard. “What’s wrong?”
She pauses with her hand on the door, and looks back at me, confused. “Nothing. . . Do you want to sleep in your car tonight, or can we go inside now?”
That sarcastic, deflection crap’s not gonna fly, not now. I scowl at her and say, “Don’t pull that shit with me, Savannah. Not after what we just did.” Pulling my beanie off, I run my fingers through my sweaty hair. “What’s wrong?”
Her face softens. “I’m just tired, that’s all. It’s been a really long night, and now you’ve made me all sleepy.” She smiles to put me at ease, but I’m not, and I can’t shake this feeling.
Before I can argue with her, Marcus’s ringtone blasts again and I roll my eyes, thinking of all the ways I can kill him tomorrow when I see him. I start to pull my phone out when Savannah reaches over and takes my keys out of the ignition.
She gives me a small smile before she climbs out of the car and heads up the stairs. My phone stops ringing while I watch her unlock the door to my apartment.
I know damn well that when I get up there, it’s not my bed she’ll be in, but hers.