It was such a turn-on when he gazed at me with those warm blue eyes, even when they were all worried and concerned as they were now. ‘Jo?’ He stepped out of his flat, reaching for me.
I wanted to lean into him, to let him hold me against him, to breathe him in, to feel his lips on my skin. I wanted that forever.
No, dammit! I drew back, taking him by surprise. I needed space. Every time I was near him, he just befuddled my brain.
He frowned, dropping his arm. ‘What’s wrong?’
I suddenly had an overwhelming desire to start crying. I held it at bay and looked anywhere but at him. ‘I quit my job.’
Silence fell between us for a moment and then he replied, ‘That’s good.’
My glare skewered him to the wall behind him. ‘No. It’s not good. It’s not bloody good, Cam.’
‘Okay, baby, calm down. Obviously something has happened.’ He sighed heavily and ran a hand through his hair. ‘And I’m about to make it either better or worse. I need to tell you something.’
Shaking my head, I took a step up the stairs that would lead me to my flat. ‘I don’t want to know. Cam’ – I took a deep breath, reaching far inside me for the strength to say it – ‘I need space to think.’
He looked stunned, almost like I’d hit him. ‘Space?’
I nodded, chewing my lip to hell.
And then Cam’s eyes darkened, his whole expression growing taut with coming anger. I began to gnaw my lip as he took a menacing step towards me. ‘Space from me?’
I nodded.
‘Fuck that shit,’ he growled, his hands reaching for me before drawing back with restraint. ‘What the hell happened today?’
‘You did,’ I replied as calmly as I could.
His eyes only blazed bluer. Apparently my being calm only exacerbated his anger. ‘Me?’
‘I keep making these rash decisions and being completely selfish and that’s not fair to Cole.’
Cam screwed up his face. ‘Rash decisions? Am I a fucking rash decision? Is that what you’re saying?’
‘No!’ I cried, aghast at the hurt in his eyes. ‘No. I don’t know.’ I threw up my hands, so confused I just wanted the floor to open up and swallow me whole. ‘Are you? Are we? I mean what are we doing here? I keep expecting –’
‘Expecting what?’
‘You to just wake up one day, realize you’re bored out of your skull, and end it.’
A very tense silence fell between us again, and I watched with growing nervousness as Cam struggled to control his frustration. Finally he met my gaze and asked quietly, ‘Have I ever given you that impression? That I’m just messing around? I took you to meet my parents, for Christ’s sake, not to mention what I’ve just done today. That bullshit is in your head and I didn’t put it there, so what is going on?’
I threw up my hands again, tears glistening in my eyes. ‘I don’t know. I quit my job and being angry at me only took me so far, so I had to be angry at you! And I’m on my period, so I might be a little emotional.’ I sucked back tears.
His lips twitched now, the anger easing from his expression.
‘It’s not funny!’ I stomped my foot like a petulant child.
With a grunt, Cam answered by hauling me off the stairs and into his arms. I automatically wrapped my arms around him and buried my burning face in his neck.
‘No more talk about needing space?’ he asked hoarsely, his warm breath on my ear.
I nodded in agreement and his arms tightened.
‘Why did you quit?’
I pulled back and he eased me to my feet, although he didn’t let go of me. Now that I was this close to him I didn’t want to let go either.
Jesus, I was such a mess.
‘He found out I dumped Malcolm and he said some horrible things to me.’
Cam’s face clouded over. ‘What horrible things?’
I shrugged. ‘Basically he said I was stupid for dumping a rich man when that was about as good as my life would get.’
‘I’m going to kill him. First, you’re going to report him for misconduct, and then I’m going to kill him.’
‘I don’t want anything else to do with him.’
‘Jo, he crossed a line.’
‘Yeah, he did. But I don’t have the luxury of time to go through the rigmarole of seeing him brought to some kind of meagre justice. I have to find a job.’
‘Braden.’
‘Nope.’ I pinched my lips together.
Cam shook his head. ‘You are so bloody stubborn.’ And then he kissed my pinched mouth open, his lips light at first and then pressing harder, drawing me deeper into his demand for more.
When he finally let me up for breath, his expression was almost pained. ‘Don’t do that to me again, okay?’
Feeling ashamed of my behaviour, and vowing to be absolutely sure about a decision before throwing something as important as a break-up Cam’s way, I pressed another kiss to his lips, my hands cupping his bristly cheeks tenderly, hoping he understood more in that kiss than I was willing to say. ‘I’m sorry,’ I whispered.
‘You’re forgiven.’ He squeezed my waist.