chapter 15
Mariah decided she’d have to do laundry soon because she was down to the last of her clean garments. As she changed out of the clothes she’d worn to do the scrubbing, she shook her head at the row between Logan and his brother. She’d never seen anything like it before in her life and wondered if the fighting was something they did routinely. She had no answer but decided it was a very odd way to welcome someone home.
Mariah?”
It was Logan at her door.
She stepped over and opened it. “Yes.” He was a mess. His clothes were muddied, his lip split and puffy, and a black eye was forming.
I’m going to get cleaned up so we can ride down to Alanza’s for dinner.”
Are you sure she’ll feed you after that performance?”
He grinned. “Drew and I were wondering the same thing. We’re hoping she’ll have calmed down by the time we arrive.”
Do you two fight like that often?”
We did growing up, but rarely now that we’re grown.”
Mariah wanted to ask why they were fighting, but in truth, didn’t really want to know. “It was an interesting way to be introduced.”
I figured it was. Alanza used to break up our fights with her buggy whip, so your scrub water was novel if nothing else.”
And your youngest brother, does he participate in these free-for-alls, too?”
Sometimes, but most times not. Being the baby, picking on him really got us whipped. Hope we didn’t scare you.”
No.”
Good. Brothers can be volatile sometimes but we do care deeply for each other, even if our actions appear otherwise.”
I did wonder.” She’d always wanted a brother or sister and hoped the Yates men were aware of how blessed they were to have both the companionship and love.
Once I’m done cleaning up, there should be enough water left for you to take a bath, too.” After the wild and woolly day, a bath sounded heavenly. “Thank you but I want to take a long soak, so I’ll take it after dinner.”
Neither seemed to know what to say next and as the silence lengthened, the familiar inability to control the cadence of her heartbeat stole over her again. Why this man? an inner voice asked. Why was she so attuned to a man she knew to be wrong for her, no matter where she turned? Yet, as their gazes held, all she could think about was that morning’s kiss, their time together on the riverbank and what he’d made her feel. Not even his facial injuries dampened the responses of her senses.
Looking at me that way makes me want to kiss you again.”
She dropped her eyes and took a small step backward. “Go get cleaned up. Let me know when you’re ready to leave for your mother’s.”
But I’m not going to kiss you again until you ask.”
Since I won’t be asking, I hope you aren’t holding your breath.”
Sounding amused, he replied, “We’ll see,” and exited her room, leaving her alone with thoughts of a man she had no business thinking about.
She had a wonderful time at dinner. The meal was conducted outside in the flower-filled courtyard, and in honor of Andrew’s homecoming, there were thick steaks done on the grill, ash-baked yams, and to drink, a fruit-infused wine called sangria. Her experience with spirits was as limited as it was with men, so she only allowed herself one small glass.
But initially, being at the family’s table and being waited upon by Alanza’s servants left her feeling very awkward.
The ever intuitive Alanza must have sensed something because she looked down the beautifully set table and said to her, “You’ve been invited to share this meal with us, Mariah. Everyone who has ever worked for us has been invited to do the same more times than I can count, so enjoy yourself.”
So she did.
Although she’d convinced herself no man could be more handsome than Logan, Andrew was. He had his mother’s straight black hair and dark eyes. His skin tone was somewhere between her ivory and Logan’s brown. She’d likened Logan’s features to having been hewn by a mountain god, but Andrew Antonio’s, even with his busted lip, bruised jaw, and black eye, bore the hands of the gods of Mexico and Spain. If a man could be called beautiful, he was that and the playful mischief in his eyes probably brought women to their knees wherever he went.
The talk at the table was of his work as a lawyer, his travels throughout the state, and the relatives he’d recently visited in Los Angeles and Mexico City. At first, the conversation was conducted in Spanish, which she knew to be a normal occurrence for their family, so she did her best not to look or feel left out. Logan noticed, however, and apologized. “Sorry, Mariah. We forget you don’t speak Spanish.”
Alanza apologized as well, but added, “Logan and I will teach you. English is the second language here.”
After that she was able to follow the conversation, although Alanza tended to slip back and forth between the two languages. Mariah wasn’t offended, though. It was her home after all.
The talk then moved to the upcoming annual celebration of Alanza’s birthday, and from the descriptions of all it would entail, she got the sense that it was a pretty big to-do.
I just hope Noah gets here in time,” Alanza said.
Logan reassured her. “You worry every year, and every year he comes. He’ll be here.”
Andrew added, “And if not, we’ll find him, and sink his ship so he’ll never miss the day again. Simple.”
His mother raised her glass to him in toast. Afterward, she asked, “Andrew, when you saw the aunts, in Los Angeles, did they say whether they were coming?”
Yes, they did.”
Good.”
After the dinner, Bonnie served them a delicious fruit flan. Mariah’d never had the dish before. It was akin to a custard, only fancier. Alanza explained that it was a traditional Spanish dessert and Mariah looked forward to having more in the future.
Soon, it was time for her and Logan to say their good-byes.
Andrew bowed gallantly over her hand and kissed it gently. “Welcome to Destiny, lovely lady. Any woman who pelts my brother with rocks holds a special place in my heart.”
Beside her she saw Logan roll his eyes. “Thank you.”
Alanza wished them a good evening and Mariah and Logan drove back to his house. On the way, she said with a smile, “I feel like I’m glowing inside.”
Logan chuckled. “It’s the sangria.”
Can’t be. I only had a small portion.”
Alanza’s wines are pretty potent.”
Well, I feel wonderful.” She was silent for a moment, then said, “Your brother’s very handsome.”
Logan’s lips thinned. “You think so.”
I do, not as handsome as you, but he’s very good-looking. Charming, too.”
That made him feel better.
She asked, “Do you really think I’m tipsy?”
I do.”
Have you ever kissed a tipsy woman?”
On occasion.”
Well, don’t kiss me, because I probably won’t want to stop.”
I’ll keep that in mind.” He wished he had a way to preserve the conversation so he could show it to her in the morning and watch her scandalized reaction. Instead, he planned to just enjoy the moment. Taking advantage of her was out of the question. When the time came for them to make love, he wanted her to be in her right mind, because in spite of her protestations to the contrary, the time would come.
They reached the house. He set the brake. “Stay put until I come around and help you down. Don’t want you to fall and hurt yourself.”
Your mother and I have decided to be friends.”
That’s a scary bit of news.”
You think so?”
Yes.”
He went around to her side, swept her up into his arms and carried her toward the house.
Why are you carrying me?”
Felt like it.”
The last time you carried me I was asleep.”
I remember.” He sat down on the porch and kept her on his lap. He was surprised when she didn’t fuss. He thought maybe prescribing a wee bit of sangria for her on a daily basis might be just what the doctor ordered. With her head lying on his chest, she seemed so content he ached from the sweetness. Clearing his throat of the emotion he said, “So, you and Alanza are going to be friends?”
We both need one. She’s terribly lonely.”
He never thought about his stepmother needing companionship. She ran the ranch and the people connected to it with such efficiency, it hadn’t occurred to him that she might not be content. “Then I thank you for wanting to be her friend.”
She’s very nice, Logan.”
He loved hearing his name on her lips.
I told her all about why I came to California and she listened and didn’t judge. She even agreed that all the beatings and whippings I received from my mother had nothing to do with me.”
Before he could respond, she revealed to him everything she’d told Alanza about her life in Philadelphia but hadn’t revealed to him on the riverbank. For Logan, a motherless child who’d been loved by Alanza from the moment they’d met, her story both angered him and broke his heart. No wonder she was so tough. Having to endure what she had must have been hard for her, especially when she was young.
She glanced up. “Do you believe in destiny?”
It depends.”
Alanza thinks I’ll find my destiny here.”
She could be right.”
I think I’d like that destiny to be with you, but you won’t marry me, so I’ll have to look for someone else.”
He went still. On one hand, the sangria-fueled confession confirmed that she was attracted to him and that made him feel good, but the idea of her being curled up contentedly on another man’s lap didn’t sit well at all.
He glanced down and saw that her eyes were closed. “Mariah?”
She was asleep. He took a moment to savor the softness in her face and the perfectness of her positioned against him. It came to him that he could sit with her in just this way forever, but he’d have to marry her in order to do so, his inner voice reminded him sagely. He wasn’t sure what to do about that, but not wanting to let her go, he sat with her sleeping against him until darkness fell, the moon rose, and the owls called across the distance. Only then did he carry her to her room and gently place her atop her bed. While the moonlight streamed through the window and bathed her with its glow, he gazed down on her while she slept unaware. Her words echoed: I think I’d like that destiny to be with you, but you won’t marry me, so I’ll have to look for someone else . . .
Moved, he bent and kissed her softly on the cheek. “Rest well, querida.” He exited and left her sleeping in the moonlight.
After climbing into his own bed, Logan thought about Mariah and what he’d learned about her: one, it only took a thimble full of sangria to make her tipsy, and two, she’d endured years of beatings at the hand of her mother for something that hadn’t been her fault. The anger from that revelation continued to resonate. Who would treat a child so harshly in order to gain revenge? He applauded her decision to strike out on her own because it freed her from her mother’s clutches and brought her to Destiny, and to him. Hearing that she and Alanza were pledging to be friends was pleasing. In spite of their disparate societal stations, he was certain they’d get along because they seemed to be cut from the same cloth. Separately they were trouble enough; united they’d likely give him fits.
Once again her words echoed in his head. Logan never considered marriage because he’d felt no need to have a woman ’til death did them part. Was he really ready to alter that stance because of a woman he’d met three days ago? That didn’t make much sense to him, but then his feelings for her didn’t either. Rather than lie awake all night while the inner debate raged back and forth, he turned over and went to sleep.
Mariah awakened the following morning and upon finding herself fully dressed in the clothes she’d worn to dinner, she sighed. Had she fallen asleep again? She assumed Logan was responsible for putting her to bed. She was grateful for that, but decided she really needed to not let it happen again. Her last memories were of the sangria, and sharing conversation with him on the ride from Alanza’s place, but she had no idea what they discussed. She’d heard that too much drink could cause one to feel badly the morning after, but in her case, outside of a little stuffiness in her head, she felt fine.
Getting up, she looked out her window. The sky was filled with the pinks and grays of dawn. She paused a moment to listen for sounds of Logan moving around in the house but heard nothing. She’d dearly wanted that bath last night and wondered if it would be possible for her to take one before the day started. Tonight she’d be going to the celebration for his goddaughter and it would be nice to be fully clean.
As if summoned, he knocked on her door. “Mariah? Are you awake?”
Since she was already dressed, she bade him enter.
Morning,” he said. The black eye was in full bloom.
You look like half a raccoon.”
He chuckled. “Why thank you. How are you feeling?”
I’m well. Thank you for putting me to bed again.”
My pleasure.”
Did I fall asleep because of the wine?”
More than likely. You were a bit tipsy.”
I didn’t embarrass myself or say anything untoward, did I?”
No.”
But there was a twinkling in his good eye that gave her pause. “Please don’t lie. If I said something or did something I should apologize to your mother for I’d like to know.”
You didn’t say anything that you wouldn’t’ve said otherwise—well, maybe.”
She went still. “What do you mean?”
You told me about your life back in Philadelphia with your mother, and—”
And?”
That you thought you’d like me to be a part of your destiny.”
I did not!”
He nodded. “Yeah, you did.”
She forced her mind to recall any parts of last night that would corroborate his words, but the effort failed. That he looked so pleased didn’t help matters. “We didn’t—do anything, did we?” If he’d made love to her, she’d know, wouldn’t she?
No, but you did ask that I not kiss you because you wouldn’t want to stop.”
Her eyes went wide as plates. This was decidedly not what she’d expected to hear. She grabbed hold of herself. “It was the wine. I hope you didn’t take me seriously.”
Sometimes, spirits allow you to say things you wouldn’t say under normal circumstances.”
I agree, because I would never have said such a thing had I been in my right mind.”
I’m talking about truthful things.”
You aren’t in my destiny and we both know why, so let’s discuss something else.”
No sense being angry. You asked me what you said and I told you.”
And I thank you. Now, would it be possible for me to have my bath this evening before we go to your goddaughter’s dance?”
Sure.”
She could tell he was amused by her reaction to his revelations, but she was not.
You want breakfast? I’m on my way over to Lupe’s to get eggs.”
Yes. Thank you,” she said stiffly.
I’ll see you when I get back.”
Once alone, she let out an audible sigh and decided she wouldn’t think about last night or anything connected to it. She’d told him to keep his kisses to himself and now she needed to put some distance between them to make certain he knew she was serious. For the past three days, she’d been reacting to him like a silly moonstruck young girl. She hadn’t come all the way to California for this. She was his housekeeper; nothing more, and the sooner she began acting like it, the sooner he’d move on to someone else. The scenario was bothersome, but she reminded herself it didn’t matter because he wasn’t for her.
He returned accompanied by his brother Andrew and Eli Braden. That pleased her in the sense that she wouldn’t be his whole focus and he wouldn’t be hers. Once the food was ready, she took her plate. “Thank you. I’ll eat inside and let you three visit.”
Not necessary,” he told her. “We won’t be discussing anything you can’t be a party to.”
I understand and I appreciate that, but my place is inside. Gentlemen, if you’ll excuse me,” and she walked to the door that led into her room and went in.
Logan watched the door close and turned back to his brother and Eli with confusion on his face.
What’d you do?” Andrew asked. “I was looking forward to breakfast with your beauty.”
Eli raised his fork. “So was I.”
I didn’t do anything that I’m aware of.”
Andrew countered, “You must’ve done something. She acted as if she’d never met us before, let alone you.”
Logan’s confusion continued and for a moment, he replayed their earlier encounter but that held no answers for him either. He certainly wasn’t going to go to her door and beg for her company, but for the life of him he couldn’t come up with a reason for her cool exit. Deciding to let her have her way, he sat and ate. His plan for the day centered around replacing the roof on the henhouse, so after breakfast, while Drew and Eli went to the mill to get the lumber for the bunkhouse and the shingles needed for the henhouse roof, he went inside.
He found her eyeing his windows.
She turned. “Do you have any butcher paper on the ranch?”
That was also confusing. “Why butcher paper?”
I need it to make patterns for your curtains. I’ll also be needing them for your goddaughter’s dresses. I suppose I can use newsprint if I must.”
Um. I’m sure there’s probably butcher paper over at the smokehouse. May I ask a question?”
Of course.”
What’s wrong?”
With what?”
With you, Mariah.”
She went back to eyeing the windows. “I don’t have my tapes, so I’m attempting to do the measurements by eye.”
That isn’t what I meant.”
What did you mean?”
Why’d you leave? We were looking forward to you having breakfast with us.”
I’m your housekeeper, Logan, and it’s better if I conduct myself as such.”
Better for whom?”
Me.”
He understood now. “So, you’re punishing me for not offering you marriage.”
As if amused, she shook her head. “No, Logan, I’m not. I’m simply here to do a job and that’s all. My place is not to have breakfast with you.”
So are you still going to attend the dance tonight?”
Yes, but as your employee—not as the woman on your arm.”
His lips tightened. He wanted to argue but had no position from which to do so. She’d already confessed to wanting his kisses, yet seemed determined to deny it and give what he desired to another man.
Anything else?” she asked.
No.”
Then I’ll go on with my day and let you get on with yours. I’ll ask Bonnie about the paper.”
Fine.” Not happy with being dismissed, he turned on his heel and walked out.
Hearing the door slam, she shook her head and went back to what she’d been doing.