169
forms on my palms and I rub them against
my shorts and place my hands over Ryan’s. His fingers clutch mine. His skin is the right mixture of strength and warmth, and his touch sends shivers through my body. I’ve gone two torturous weeks without a cigarette and I really crave one right now.
“All right, Lace,” Ryan says in that deep, soothing voice. “Whenever you’re ready.”
Ryan and I have been holding hands for five seconds.
“It’s kind of high.” Lacy stands on the edge of the platform. A bit of the fire that constantly lives in her eyes diminishes.
Ryan gives me that glorious smile—the cute one with a hint of dimples. A curling heat spreads in my bloodstream. Damn, I like that smile.
“You can do this, baby,” says Chris.
Ryan’s thumb moves across the top of my
hands and every single cell of my being
becomes a live electrical socket. We’ve been holding hands for ten seconds.
“I know.” Lacy doesn’t look like she knows.
She looks as unsure as I feel about catching her. “Maybe one of you guys should go.”
HC TITLE-AUTHOR
170
“Turn around, Lace, and fall backwards.”
Ryan uses a gentle yet commanding tone. Even though he speaks to Lacy, he keeps those brilliant light brown eyes locked on me. His thumb does another heart-skipping sweep across my hand. “You’ve got this and you
know we got you.”
I wonder what it would be like if he held me in his arms? Would I feel as alive as I do now?
“You’re right,” she sighs. “Give me a sec.”
My hands sweat again and I don’t want any more thoughts of my body lying next to his or visions of his hands on my skin or hope that his smile is for me. I don’t want anyone touching me anymore. Especially guys that are strong and warm and slightly cute and can make my heart stutter. I try to pull away, but Ryan tightens his grip. “What are you doing?”
“She can’t do it,” I say. “And she shouldn’t have to.”
Ryan studies me for a second. “Yes, she can.
Lacy can do anything she puts her mind to.”
I try to jerk my arms away again, but Ryan’s hold is too tight.
“This is stupid.” Panic floods my brain and makes me feel a little crazy. “All of this is HC TITLE-AUTHOR
171
stupid. What’s the stupid point?”
“To learn how to work together as a team
and to put our trust in one another.” Ryan’s voice becomes a calming balm on my panic until I figure out how much I want to listen.
This isn’t good. Not good at all. Isn’t that how the pied piper worked? Didn’t he play something soothing and all the rats drowned?
“I’m not a part of your stupid team.”
“I know, but let’s pretend for a few seconds that you are.”
“She’s ready,” says Chris.
A split second later Lacy’s Nikes are inches from my face. Resting safely in our hands, Lacy laughs. “That was great. Let’s do it again.”
Ryan releases me and helps the guys lower Lacy to her feet. I step back and try to rub any trace of Ryan off onto my clothes. I don’t want strong hands holding my arms. I don’t want to be part of a team, and I sure as hell don’t have to prove anything by jumping off a ledge.
“You’re next, Beth,” Ryan says.
“No.” The word comes out automatically.
“You’re going to have to go sometime, so
let’s do it now.”
HC TITLE-AUTHOR
172
“I swear it’s not that bad.” Lacy flies to my side. “At first I was like ‘no way’ and then Ryan was like ‘You can’ and then I thought ‘I can’t’ and then I thought ‘These guys would never drop me’ and I was like ‘Okay’ and then I did it and it was such a rush.”
Logan and Chris warily look at me. They’d drop me. Just like Ryan would definitely drop me. “What type of game are you playing?” I ask of Ryan.
He narrows his eyes. “What?”
“You used Lacy to lure me over here. Was
your plan to make me believe I could trust you and then drop me so everyone can laugh?”
With each word, my voice becomes higher and my heart pounds faster in my chest.
Ryan shakes his head. “No.”
I turn on my heel and head to the locker
room. I’ll claim cramps and blood and periods and tampons and keep saying words like menstruation until the teacher lets me out of class. Right on the verge of entering the locker room, Ryan’s large figure looms in front of me.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
“Go away,” I say.
He points at me. “You are a part of this team HC TITLE-AUTHOR
173
and you will help us until this task is done.”
“No,” I bite out. “I’m not part of your
perfect team.”
“Get back over there.”
“Here’s the beauty of living in America. You can’t make me do a damn thing.” I slam my body into his and enter the safety of the locker room.
HC TITLE-AUTHOR
174
Ryan