“I did some research while I was gone—Rocco’s fifteen years old and dropped out of
school a month before coming here,” Cameron told me, his voice, his expression still bland.
“Yikes! You mean he’s not even close to being full grown yet? He’ll be a monster by the time
he’s eighteen. Are you sure you can afford to keep feeding him?” I tried a little harder.
I thought I had seen Cameron’s lips bending up; but whatever semblance of a smile might have
been coming, it was gone by the time he lifted his eyes; in its place was a cold stare.
“He’s getting his GED if he’s going to stay here. I won’t have him spend his days rotting in
front of the TV and doing nothing good with his life.”
I swallowed hard while he collected his papers.
“I could help him,” I offered uneasily. “With homework and stuff.”
He pushed his chair back. “Whatever keeps you busy.”
I felt the sting.
“Cameron, about last night—” I started, making a split-second decision on which story I would
go with, but his daggered eyes interrupted me.
I lost my voice; he looked over my shoulder. Spider and Carly were in the kitchen doorway with
files in their arms.
“What is it?” Cameron snapped.
“We’re ready,” Spider said to him, completely impervious to Cameron’s mood—unlike me, and
unlike Carly. Her eyes veered between Cameron and me, and she gave me a weighted smile. I couldn
’t manage to give her anything back.
“I’ve got a lot of work to do. This will have to wait,” Cameron said to me in passing, never
actually looking at me.
They left me standing, battered in the middle of the kitchen. After an intense session of
staring down my bowl of cereal, I fiercely pushed it down the table—it tipped and spilled over.
I went to the kitchen to get a dishrag. When I got there, I kept walking.
Outside, the morning sun was already steaming the waterlogged lawn, making the air stifling. No
wind blew through the trees. No birds chirped. I could see Griff’s shape blinking in the waves
of heat, like a mirage, and I was sweating before I had even reached the halfway point between
us, soaked by the time I actually reached him. The scowl on his face hadn’t improved since I’d
last seen him.
“You’re making it really difficult for me to ignore you,” he grumbled.
“Oh? Were you trying to ignore me? I hadn’t noticed,” I retorted, sarcasm heavy.
Griff rolled his eyes and scanned the scene, a valiant effort to continue to ignore me. He
looked cool.
This irritated me even more.
“You know you have no right to be angry at me for getting in trouble with Spider for not doing
your job while they were gone,” I told him.
“Who said I was angry at you?”
“You just admitted that you were trying to ignore me.”
“Ignore, yes. Angry, no—never with you,” he said with sincerity.
“Same difference,” I snapped.
“Huge difference. I’m just trying to protect you.” This seemed to be the common explanation
for everything that aggravated me. “I’ve been told to stay away from you, or it’s lights out
for me.” Griff put his hand to his throat and pretended to slice his neck from ear to ear. “I
figure I can’t keep you safe if I’m dead. So I’ll stay away and keep an eye on you from here.
”
“I think the only way Spider can convince you to do your job is by threatening you,” I
reasoned, still amped for war. “Anyway, I can protect myself. You don’t need to protect me
from anyone, and you definitely don’t need to use me as your excuse for not working. There’s
no need to be overdramatic about this. Spider’s just doing his job.” Cameron’s words echoed
through my voice.
“I’m being overdramatic?” he repeated incredulously. “What world do you live in? These guys
have killed better people than me without even blinking. So far, they seem to like to have you
around. But, believe me, once they have what they want or they get sick of you, you’ll be in
big trouble too.” Griff looked around and lightly grabbed my arm, tugging himself toward me and
whispering, “I won’t let them do anything to you. They’ll all die before they hurt you.”
He let go of my arm and took a step back, his eyes flicking over the grounds.
Of the few guards that I could see through the heat waves, all seemed as preoccupied as I was
with keeping cool.
“So you’ll just keep ignoring me. And then what?” I asked, my irritation evaporating. Griff
was genuinely scared. I couldn’t be angry with him for that—though I was slightly disappointed
that I wouldn’t get the chance to air out my frustrations.
“I don’t know,” he admitted wearily. “I haven’t figured that out yet. Do you know why they
’re keeping you alive?”
I wondered if Griff noticed that I didn’t flinch while we discussed my life—and death. I had
no reason to be scared. I wanted to tell Griff about Cameron, but I couldn’t. I wanted to tell
Griff about Bill, but I didn’t. I was suddenly afraid that he would see me differently. So I
simply shook my head in response.