Then he said, “Okay. Whatever. I’ll calm down. Tell him to let me up.”
I looked back at Creed who was still fighting a smile. “Although you aren’t deaf, just in case you missed it, he says he’ll calm down. You can let him up.”
Creed’s grin broke through and he waited a full five seconds before he pushed off and straightened away from Douchebag Dan. This, incidentally, made me love him more and I already loved him a whole fuckuva lot.
Dan struggled to his feet, swiping at grass clippings on his clothes as he took a healthy, and wise, step back from Creed while glowering at him.
“Are you seriously seeing my wife?” he asked.
“Yeah,” Creed lied. “She’s hot,” Creed did not lie.
Dan looked to the house, muttering, “I don’t believe this shit.”
“I don’t know what’s not to believe, Dan,” I stated. “Life goes on. Bills need to get paid. Women need to get laid. Lawns need to get mowed. Bonus for the kids, Tucker here,” I indicated Creed with a swing of my hand, “actually likes them.”
I saw Dan blanch even as his eyes narrowed on me.
“That wasn’t cool, Sylvie,” he said quietly.
Oh shit. I was getting mad.
I knew Creed knew it because he took a step toward me but I didn’t tear my eyes from Douchebag Dan.
“Are you kidding me? That wasn’t cool? You left them,” I reminded him.
“Maybe my head was screwed up but she’s fuckin’ another guy!” he shot back. “I’ve only been gone two months, for fuck’s sake.”
I leaned toward him. “Two months and a week, Dan,” I clipped. “You won’t know this because you didn’t do fuck all while you were here, so let me educate you. That extra week is a lot when you got three kids to take care of, one a toddler, one special needs and you got a lawn to mow, storm windows to take out, faucets that leak, a mortgage that needs to get paid, a car that needs fixed and a second job to get so you can try to make ends meet. You didn’t even leave her the new TV so she could hock it and maybe buy groceries for a couple of days.”
“I wasn’t gone long and she had the savings,” Dan returned.
“She had half the savings, Dan, and no word from you. She had no idea you’d come back. Hell, you didn’t even give her a head’s up you were going.”
“Then she’s blind and deaf, Sylvie, and you’re her best friend so you fuckin’ know it,” Dan shot back.
I hated to admit it but he was right even though the action he took wasn’t.
“So that’s okay, your nonverbal, man communication shoots by her because she’s got three kids to take care of and a full-time job? She should have known something was wrong and fixed it? That lets you off since Charlene didn’t make the effort to drag it out of you?” I threw an arm out. “Jesus, Dan, if you’re serious about that crap you’re more of a douchebag than I thought and I thought you were the King of Douchebags.”
“You don’t get how it is,” he retorted.
Oh yeah. He was pissing me off.
“Clue in, Dan,” I ground out. “I’ve been over here nearly every morning since you took off. I only have forty-five minutes a morning of it but I still know how it is. I also know your wife does not complain. She loves those kids, that house, her family, her life and she used to love you. You fucked up, asshole, huge.”
“Sylvie, go inside. See to the kids. Get Charlene out here.”
This was Creed ordering me around and, in doing so, we’d discovered a time when I wasn’t real fond of him being bossy.
Therefore I replied, “No way.”
“I’m not moving and if I don’t like how it goes down between them, he’s gone and she’s inside. Yeah?” Creed returned.
I took in a big breath and countered, “How about if you figure I won’t like what goes down, he’s gone and she’s inside?”
“Sylvie, just go get Charlene,” Creed kept being bossy.
“Creed –”
“Woman, there is no way in fuck I’m gonna let this motherfucker who walked out on his wife and kids pull shit on her,” Creed declared before he stressed, “No fuckin’ way. You know that. You know me. You got nothin’ to worry about. Now, baby, go the fuck inside, get Charlene and see to the kids.”
“Baby?” Douchebag Dan asked at this juncture and I controlled my blood pressure by looking at him which didn’t exactly help.
“I forgot to mention, he’s my man, too. We do three-ways. They rock. See? You totally missed out. You hung around and acted like a decent guy, who knows what would have happened?”
After delivering that, verbally marking my score at the look of shock and hunger that cut through his features, I ignored Creed looking to the sky and shaking his head and stomped into the house.