Mark frowned. “Landon knows who you are. He doesn’t have a problem with it.”
“I know. But the PhazeOne system is a pretty big deal. There’s risk involved with having access to it, and I don’t need to contribute to that in any way.” It was hard admitting that Gideon was right, because I knew I was right, too. Which left us at an impasse I didn’t know how to get around.
Steven leaned closer and studied me. “You’re serious.”
“Afraid so. Not that your decision is in any way affected by me, Mark, but I thought I should put that out there.”
“I’m not sure I understand,” Mark said.
“She’s telling you that if you stay with your job, you’ll be losing both the money and your assistant,” Steven clarified. “Or you can move to Cross Industries as you’ve already agreed to do, get the money, and keep Eva.”
“Well …” God. This was harder than I’d thought it would be. I had heard it but now I was living it: Any woman who loses or gives up a job she loves because of a man will resent it … What had ever made me think I would be somehow exempt? “I can’t say yet that I’ll be making the move with you.”
Mark fell back against the burgundy vinyl booth. “This just keeps getting worse.”
“I’m not saying definitively that I won’t.” I tried to shrug it off as no big deal. “I’m just not sure that Gideon and I should be working together. I mean I’m not sure he should be my boss … or whatever. You know what I mean.”
“I hate to say it,” Steven said, “but she’s got a point.”
“This is not helping my problem,” Mark muttered.
“I’m sorry.” I couldn’t tell them how sorry I really was. I didn’t even feel like I could offer advice. How could I be nonbiased about Mark’s options?
“On the bright side,” I offered instead, “you’re definitely a hot commodity.”
Steven elbowed Mark with a grin. “I knew that already.”
“So”—Cary slung his arm around me when I curled into his side—“here we are again.”
Another night at my mom’s. She’d finally gotten suspicious, considering it was our fourth night in a row at her place. I confessed to arguing with Gideon, but not why. I didn’t think she would understand. I’m sure she would think it was perfectly normal for a man in Gideon’s position to handle all the pesky little details. And as for me possibly losing my job? Why would I want to work when I had no financial reason to?
She didn’t understand. Some daughters wanted to grow up to be just like their mothers; I wanted the opposite. And my need to be the anti-Monica was the main reason I struggled so much with what Gideon had done. Any advice from her would only make things worse. I almost resented her as much as I did him.
“We’ll go home tomorrow,” I said.
After all, I’d be seeing Gideon at Dr. Petersen’s office at the very least. I was desperately curious about how that would go. I couldn’t help but hope that Gideon had turned a major corner with therapy. If so, maybe there were other corners we could turn. Together.
I crossed my fingers.
And really, I had to give Gideon credit for doing his best to give me the space I’d asked for. He could’ve caught me in an elevator or the lobby of the Crossfire. He could have told Raúl to drive me to him instead of wherever I directed. Gideon was trying.
“Have you heard from Trey?” I asked.
It was kind of miraculous how often Cary and I ended up in the same place at the same time. Or maybe it was a shared curse.
“He sent me a text saying he was thinking about me but wasn’t ready to talk yet.”
“Well, that’s something.”
His hand ran up and down my back. “Is it?”
“Yes,” I said. “I’m in the same place with Gideon. I think about him all the time, but I don’t have anything to say to him right now.”