“Hey, it’s Stella,”
“Hey Stella, I was starting to worry.” I feel guilty at his words. I’ve been lying like crazy to him. I made up a story about there being a farmers’ convention out in Los Angeles that I was going to this weekend. I told him I was going with the hope of meeting some investors who might help pull us out of the hole we were in. Tim is still kind of stuck in the old ways and barely uses a computer unless it’s to order something we need, so he didn't really question me much.
“Sorry, I got caught up but I’ve got news. I got an investor, so anything you need for the farm right now you go ahead and get. The money should have been deposited, so just charge whatever to the company card that’s in my desk top drawer.” I tell him this knowing the first five million should have been deposited this morning.
“That’s great.” His tone might seem low and flat to anyone else, but I’ve known Tim since I was little. I can hear the relief in his voice.
“If you need any help tending to the extra work, go ahead and bring some people on. I’m going to be gone for a little longer but everything is fine now.”
“Sounds good. I’ll hire the Wilks boys to come over and help. They are always looking for extra work,” he says, talking about the family that lives down the road from the farm.
“They do pretty good work. And Dad?”
Tim goes silent, and I know he is thinking of a way of telling me something, a way to phrase something without lying, but without telling me the honest truth either. This is something he never does. He’s always honest with me. Guilt weighs a little heavily on me for the lies I’ve been telling him.
“He was home last night. He’s just still sleeping it off.” I glance over at the clock and see it’s already three in the afternoon. Jesus.
“All right.” What else can I really say? “You can reach me at this number if you need me.” We say our goodbyes, and I feel a little bit calmer. Almost like something has been lifted off my shoulders.
I look back at the clock and see that only a minute has passed. I wonder when they will be back. I should have brought some books or my Kindle. I make my way to the kitchen and grab a banana out of the bowl on the counter. I sit down at the breakfast bar and open the paper.
Flipping through the pages, I stop cold on page six.
Looks like the rumors are true! Casino hot-shot Justin Cortez and Reality Star Natasha Woods are hot and heavy.
It’s then I realize who the woman is. She’s a famous reality star who lands on the covers of magazines around Las Vegas all the time. The same woman I saw Justin with downstairs only moments ago.
The picture shows him leaning in close, whispering in her ear, with her pressing her body into his. She’s smiling right at the camera. The article goes on to talk about the event they were at. The one that was hosted at this casino last night. Where they went last night after they left the room.
I can’t bring myself to read it and I drop it back down on the counter. I head back to the living room and plop back down onto the sofa.
The mistress contract said we weren't to ask the clients about where they spent their time; it wasn't our business, but Justin made it seem so different this morning. Or maybe that was their game. They wanted a woman at home but wanted to do whatever they wanted when they were out and about. It wasn't an unheard of arrangement in Vegas.
They are rich men who want to have their cake and eat it too. Or maybe they think since I got both of them, they should get other people too. I drop my head in my hands and force myself not to cry. I feel like I’m drowning in the grief of losing something I never even had.
I should have listened to myself in the beginning. Men like Justin and Aaron are too good to be true. Yeah, they may want me. They may even want to keep me, but I wouldn't be the only one they spent time with and that just isn't something I’m cut out for.
Back to plan A, which would be easier this time. I know the game for sure. Do your thirty days and be done. Put your walls back up, Stella. Guard yourself. Do as they command, and walk away with what you came for.
I hear the elevator ding, and I look up to see Justin and Aaron exit, both with big smiles on their faces. They both stride towards me. Justin reaches me first, pulling me up into his arms. He kisses me, and I willingly open my mouth. It takes everything in me not to kiss him back, but I don't deny him access either. It is, after all, what they paid for.
He pulls back and looks at me in puzzlement.
“You look beautiful, baby,” he says.
“Thank you.” My words are flat. I should at least try to pretend, but it's just too soon. The bitterness of what I lost is still too fresh.