Krys gave up on Twyla and looked to me. “Do not do that. Talk to him.”
Twyla stopped looking at Krys and her eyes came to me. “Do not talk to him. Throw yourself at him.”
“Stop telling her that,” Krys snapped at Twyla.
Twyla crossed her arms on her chest and looked back at Krystal.
“You get I like girls,” she stated but it was a prompt.
“Yes,” Krystal replied.
“And I like girls who do things like wear mascara and lipstick.”
“I know your partner, Twyla, you both were at my house for Bubba’s barbeque spareribs three weeks ago,” Krys returned.
“Right so, I like girls. And I’ve liked ‘em all my life. I was a marine. I’ve shot a gun. I own five of them, guns that is. I watch the Nuggets, Avs, Broncos and Rockies. I’ve never in my life worn a skirt. I wear a sports bra because with these babies,” she circled her bosoms with a pointed finger before dropping her hand to the checkout desk, “I got no choice. God saw fit to grant me an A cup, no way. Since I’m a C, I’m fucked. I have never worn mascara. I do not own a blow dryer. And I get off on goin’ down on chicks. Now which one, you or me, has more in common with Chace Keaton?”
I had to admit, she had a point there.
Krystal had to admit it too, even though I could tell she didn’t want to. I could tell because she opened her mouth and closed it.
Twyla looked at me.”Throw yourself at him.”
Krystal closed her eyes, dropped her head to look at her boots and her honeyed locks fell forward to hide her face.
I whispered to Twyla, “I kinda already tried that.”
Krystal’s head shot up as Twyla’s eyebrows did the same.
“No go?” Twyla asked.
“He, uh… shuts it down or, um… redirects it but um… mostly shuts it down and concentrates on kissing.”
“He know you’re a virgin?” Twyla asked.
“Um…” I answered, not knowing until then that Twyla knew I was a virgin.
“How much neckin’ you do?” Twyla requested details when I was unable to go on.
“I have little experience but it feels like, on a scale of one to ten, one hundred and fifteen.”
Krystal grinned.
Twyla kept up her interrogation. “So, you had little experience before him?”
I nodded.
“On a scale of one to ten, how much experience did you have?” Twyla pushed.
“Point two five,” I replied quietly.
“He knows you’re a virgin,” Twyla muttered and my heart jumped, not pleasantly.
Krystal punched her in the arm. “Now you’re freaking Faye out.”
“Uh, just to be clear, the ‘throw yourself at him’ bit already freaked me out,” I shared.
“So what’s on tonight?” Twyla asked, ignoring my share.
“Dinner at his place, the first time I’ve been there,” I told her.
“Bring panties and a toothbrush. Then find a way to tell him you brought panties and a toothbrush.” She suddenly clapped, I jumped and she finished, “Done.”
“Oh my God, that’s actually a good idea,” Krystal whispered and Twyla’s eyebrows shot up again, this time in affront.
“You think I walked five blocks in the Colorado Mountain March cold for no reason?” Twyla queried. “I’m a lesbian who can jack most motherfuckers up. I know non-lesbians who can do the same. You bein’ one of ‘em, I might add, though you do it with a shotgun in your hand. Same freakin’ thing. But bein’ a lesbian don’t make me not good at advice.”
I made mental note of this and added Twyla to my phone tree for when I experienced a relationship emergency.
“I didn’t say that you weren’t,” Krystal retorted.
“Felt that way,” Twyla shot back, Krys’s eyes narrowed and she leaned in.
“Now you’re being sensitive. I’ll remind you, Faye called me,” Krys stated.
“Maybe so, but when there’s a problem, it’s all hands on deck,” Twyla returned.
Krystal had no retort, looked stymied and also looked angry that she was. Not unusual, just scarier than normal.
I decided to wade in. “Just an FYI,” I said to Twyla. “I’ve added you to my relationship emergency phone tree.”
Twyla grinned huge at me.
“Great,” Krys muttered. “I finally get my shot, I get bumped because Twyla horned in.”
I blinked at Krystal because she sounded genuinely aggrieved.
It then hit me that Krystal Briggs had let me in. Not like she had Chace. In in. She cared about me. She wanted to help. I was past the hard outside layer that kept everyone out and was in the soft, warm center.
Which made me feel warm inside too.
“Don’t worry, Krys, her bein’ a virgin and him bein’ the kind of man he is, I’m sure you’ll get your chance,” Twyla assured.
I suddenly didn’t feel warm inside anymore.
“What kind of man is he?” I whispered and Krys and Twyla both looked at me.
Then they both said at the same time with the same emphasis, “All man.”
I felt a shiver. It wasn’t a bad one. It wasn’t a good one. It was a nervous one.