chapter 14
Shock ripped through Holly, her heart twisting with the horrific words. Rafiq’s uncle had attempted to kill him? Had killed his own brother and sister-in-law?
“But why? Oh God, why would he do something so horrible?” Her voice broke and she tightened her grip on his robes.
“Because he wanted the Sheikhdom, and my father and I were the only people standing in his way.”
Holly struggled to swallow as emotion gathered thick in her throat. Even without looking at him, she could bring to mind the thick scar that ran across his face and down his neck. The horror of it all had her stomach churning with bile.
She shook her head and pressed her cheek against his chest. Despite the obvious fact he was here today, she needed to reassure herself he was alive. Hear his heart pumping blood through his veins. “How old were you?”
“Twenty-three.”
The same age she was now.
“I’m so sorry, Rafiq.”
Beneath her head she felt his nonchalant shrug. “It was nearly a decade ago. I was fortunate enough to survive, but my parents were not so lucky. I, however, was left with the face of a monster.”
“You don’t have the face of a monster. I wish you’d stop thinking that.” But it was clear his uncle had left a deep bitterness and distrust of human nature. “Your uncle was the monster. A horrific, heartless man.” She lifted her head from his chest, her own fear just a shred of her emotions now as she stared up at him.
Holly cupped his scarred cheek again, and muscles in his jaw flexed under her palm. His eyes were already hard as flint as he stared beyond her.
“To me you’ll always be a strong, handsome leader.” She shifted slightly to press a kiss against the groove in his face.
“Holly…” His body shuddered and his arms tightened around her.
“What happened to your uncle? I hope he’s in prison.”
“He was killed by one of my father’s guards before he could flee the palace.”
Relief slid through her. Not that she feared for Rafiq’s safety any longer—the man had guards everywhere—but that such an evil man no longer walked the streets.
Rafiq was lost in a memory and seemed barely aware of her presence anymore.
“Look at me, Rafiq.”
He blinked before glancing back at her. Her heart clenched at the pain she saw there, knowing he wouldn’t want her to see.
“Yes, you have a scar,” she said. “But it pales in comparison to the one your uncle left on your heart.”
His hand slid up to cover hers. “My people fear me, Holly.”
“Your people love you and are thrilled with what you’ve done for Raljahar. More than anyone, Rafiq, you should know better than to believe what you read.”
“It’s more than what the papers print.”
She almost argued with him, but there was truth to Rafiq’s words. “Maybe some of your people do fear you,” she said tentatively. “But it’s only because they have no idea who you truly are. Do you ever go out and visit with the people of your country?”
“Not often. There are risks…”
“Your guards will protect you—they’ve followed on our heels all week like dogs begging for a treat. Take them with you. You have a wonderful, beautiful country, Rafiq. And your people are warm and loving.”
He scowled. “I enjoy my palace.”
She laughed. “Of course you do, it’s paradise. I simply think your people would enjoy a bit of interaction with their Sheikh.”
“Hmm.” He didn’t sound convinced.
“They fear you because you’ve created this imposing image of yourself. And maybe your temper could…” She cleared her throat. “Use a little improving.”
He arched a brow, though fortunately his mouth quirked. “You think I’m short-tempered?”
“Well, a little, yes. I’ve seen you yell at your staff.”
Rafiq grunted but didn’t argue.
“All I’m saying is perhaps you should smile a little more. Crack a joke or two.”
“Crack a joke?” Now he did laugh softly. “Holly, you are a delight.”
Her breath caught at how much a genuine smile on his face could transform him. “Like that,” she whispered. “Rafiq, you’re mesmerizing. If people saw you the way I did, they wouldn’t help but fall…”
She didn’t finish her sentence, suddenly all too aware of what she’d been about to say. Of everything she’d been saying for the past few minutes. It seemed not only had the brandy loosened her fear, but her lips as well.
Rafiq pulled her wrist from his cheek and cradled it between his hands. He turned it over and brushed a kiss against her racing pulse.
Warm shivers ran through her and she just barely bit back a sigh. She swallowed hard instead and lifted her gaze to his. “Thank you for opening up to me. I know it wasn’t easy.”
“I am the one who owes appreciation, Holly.”
For what? she nearly blurted. For lecturing him on what a reclusive grouch he could be? God, she would never drink brandy again.
“You helped me remember who I am.”
She gave him a small smile. “Well, you helped make flying a bit more tolerable.”
“It was the brandy.”
“It was more than the brandy. It’s you holding me and talking to me. Whether you realize it or not, Rafiq. You’re actually quite the nurturer.”
You’ll be a good father some day. Holly had to bite her lip from saying the rest aloud. But the words were in her heart and it ached a bit to think about it. It was all too easy to imagine Rafiq with a small, dark-featured child on his lap, whom he would undoubtedly have with a woman of his country.
She closed her eyes because she knew the sudden wash of pain might be reflected there.
“Are you all right? Has the turbulence frightened you?”
Turbulence? She hadn’t even noticed the turbulence on the plane, only in her heart.
“I’m all right.” She pulled her hand away and cleared her throat. “But perhaps I could have some water?”
Rafiq didn’t hesitate, just moved to press a button that must’ve been hidden in the headboard somewhere. He spoke in Arabic, his words calm and soft, lacking the usual terse edge.
Perhaps he did heed her advice after all. The thought should’ve sent a thrill of pleasure through her, instead her stomach still churned from the thought of Rafiq and another woman.
She drew in a slow, calming breath. Her time with him had an expiration date. She’d known that going in, and she couldn’t allow herself to forget.
Rafiq was the Sheikh of Raljahar. A Sheikh. There was no future for them and he’d always been upfront with her. Perhaps his motives for bedding her no longer centered on revenge, but she wouldn’t delude herself into thinking they centered on the one thing she needed most.
Love.
On the drive back to the palace, Rafiq struggled with what had happened on the plane. He’d never intended to tell Holly quite so much of his past, to give her such an intimate glimpse at the pain and anger still lingering inside him.
Her points had been valid, but not new to him. They now raced through his mind as quickly as the limo moved through the city streets. He saw his country through different eyes, how Holly might’ve seen it.
He’d shut his people out, avoided interacting them, and done so deliberately. He’d rejected them before they could reject him.
Before he’d been scarred, the citizens of Raljahar had never taken him seriously. And why should they have, when he’d lived the life of an overindulged playboy? After his father had been murdered and Rafiq had taken over the Sheikhdom, their reaction had been a mix of fear and skepticism.
He’d proved their doubt wrong and built Raljahar into a thriving country, but he’d preferred to spend his time in the palace instead of watching the wariness and fear on his people’s faces when they saw him.
He stared out at the posh casino glittering in the distance. Observed the bustling shoppers filling the upscale mall that held a variety of designer shops.
But it was while passing Raljahar’s public marketplace that his chest swelled with pride. Adults and children waved with excitement as the limo sped by, the symbol of the Sheikhdom a discreet mark on the windows.
“They love you. Especially the children.”
Holly’s soft observation made him wince.
“They love the idea of a Sheikh who has turned the country around.” He shook his head. “I cannot even remember the last time I’ve had contact with a child.”
Her gaze skittered to his, shock reflecting in their depths. “Really? I can’t imagine. I love children.”
Children were more likely to fear him than be drawn to him, but he didn’t voice his thoughts aloud.
It didn’t surprise him Holly adored children; she seemed very much the mothering type. It had shown in the way she’d tried to protect her brother.
Her head turned again and she smiled and waved at the children. They wouldn’t be able to see her, but she didn’t seem to care, and the joy on her face could not be feigned.
His mind flickered back to an article in a magazine he’d seen while she still modeled.
It was from a story about poverty in a third-world country, and how some stars were helping raise awareness and money. Holly had been in several photos, playing with the children or holding a baby. At the time he’d assumed it was simply publicity shots her manager had encouraged.
Now, he very much doubted it was anything but her genuine interest in being involved. It was all too easy to imagine Holly with her own children. Holding a baby to her breast.
His heart squeezed at the image.
“I wanted to teach special-needs children.” Her tone turned wistful. “It was what I was going to college for, before the money…” She shook her head and shrugged. “Who knows, perhaps I’ll go back to school when I return to the States.”
Her words jolted him. Rafiq’s chest tightened and he struggled to breathe evenly. Of course she would be thinking about her return to the States and how she would leave him someday. That was, and always had been, the agreement.
And yet back in Monaco, for a moment, hadn’t he worried about Holly growing more attached to him? Perhaps she’d simply been caught up in the moment.
The idea of Holly leaving reminded him of another uneasy thought. “We did not use protection.”
She tensed and turned to look at him once more. Some of the color leeched from her face. “No. We didn’t.”
“It seems unlikely anything should come of it, but you will, of course, let me know.”
“Of course.” She looked away quickly, but not before he’d seen the flicker of distress in her eyes.
It seemed a pregnancy was not an exciting prospect for Holly, at least not now when she was so young and eager to return to school. Perhaps when she was older and settled with some robust, overprotective American husband.
The image, just as the one of her leaving, ate bitterly at his gut, and Rafiq’s fingers closed into a fist.
But what if there was a child? What then? No matter how much he might fear it, everything would have to change.
Rafiq had Holly and her things moved into his room immediately when they returned. Since they’d officially become lovers, there really was no reason for the separate rooms. Plus it would keep his staff from gossiping.
Not that they’d ever do so. Though they might be quietly curious about Holly in the palace, they were loyal to the bone.
Most days he would leave to go into the city, working tirelessly to set the logistics for a second casino in Raljahar to be built. His country was small, but already in the past two years the luxury mall had expanded three blocks, renting retail space to the top designer names.
Though business was going well during the day, Rafiq could not wait for the evening when his limo would return him to the palace and to Holly. In the two weeks since they’d returned, he looked forward to walking through his doors to find Holly somewhere inside, always a happy smile on her face.
Within the privacy of their room she welcomed him into her arms and then melted beneath his touch. Hearing her cry his name had become the most sinfully decadent dessert he craved at the end of each day.
Holly being in his bed, beside him, felt natural. It was a relief to wake from the nightmares that occasionally plagued him and find her reaching for him. Comforting him.
Closing his file, Rafiq glanced up as the limo pulled onto the palace grounds. He could scarcely wait for the vehicle to slow; his fingers already caressed the handle on the door as he anticipated seeing Holly again.
He shook his head, wondering how she could cloud his mind so easily. How one woman could encompass his every free thought.
The limo came to a stop and Rafiq pushed open the door.
“F-forgive me, Your Majesty.” The chauffer’s cheeks reddened as he stumbled out a moment later.
Rafiq gave his driver a wide smile. “No apologies needed. I’m perfectly capable of getting myself out of the car.”
The chauffer looked hesitant and then smiled in response. “Thank you, Your Majesty.”
Rafiq nodded and then turned away, moving briskly toward the palace doors. Every step he took, every breath he drew in brought him closer to her. His fingers itched to touch her and to have her soft lips parted beneath his in greeting.
If he’d taken time to analyze it more, he might’ve been puzzled by the change in Holly. It was as if she’d made it her mission to be everything he would want in a mistress. Or perhaps even a wife.
The last thought almost made him stumble over his feet. He slowed his stride, his brows drawing together.
His staff greeted him as he entered the palace, their smiles eager and their greetings warm. In the time that had passed since their return from Monaco, he’d been very diligent in his efforts to be more patient and kind to his staff. To anyone he came into contact with.
To his surprise, it wasn’t all that difficult. And their responses, initially tentative and surprised, continued to please him. It was possible he hadn’t noticed it before, but there was more smiling and laughter within the palace now.
As he walked farther into his home, he looked around the hallway and each room, but there was no sign of Holly.
Foreboding gathered slowly in his stomach, and he hurried to stop the female assistant he’d assigned to Holly. “Have you seen Miss Winchester?” He forced any severity from his expression and kept his tone casual.
The woman’s eyes flickered with unease before she gave a quick nod. “She is in your room, Your Majesty.”
“Thank you.” Relief slid through him that she was safely in the palace, but the unease in his gut didn’t lessen.
Rafiq opened the door to his bedroom and then closed it silently behind him. His gaze traced every inch of the large room, seeking out Holly’s form. It took a moment before he spotted it. His heart tripped as he noticed her curled up, so still, lying on top of the bed.
Was she asleep?
Rafiq crossed the room, his footsteps nearly silent on the marbled floors. When he reached the bed, he sat down on the edge of the mattress.
Holly’s eyes were closed and her chest rose steadily. With a gentle hand, he reached out to brush his fingers over her forehead.
Her lashes fluttered open and she stared at him with disorientation in her gaze. And then it shifted—for a moment there was a flash of pain in the blue depths.
He reached for her hand. “Holly?”
“I’m sorry,” she murmured. “I didn’t realize it was so late. I must’ve fallen asleep.”
“There’s no need to apologize for sleeping, habiba. Are you feeling well?” The moment the words left his mouth, a thought blindsided him.
His fingers curled around hers and his gaze slid to her other hand he hadn’t noticed pressed against her belly.
Was it possible? Could Holly have discovered she was pregnant? A rushing sounded in his head as his blood quickened. “Holly? Tell me, what is it?”
She didn’t answer immediately, and her lashes fluttered down to hide her eyes. “I’m sorry. You’re right, I’m not feeling well.” She bit her lip and a strange expression flitted across her face. “I started my cycle this morning.”
It took a moment for her words to sink in, but even when they did Rafiq couldn’t believe he’d heard them right. He’d been prepared to hear something else entirely.
But Holly wasn’t pregnant. Their first time together, without protection, had resulted in nothing.
“But at least you don’t have to worry about me being pregnant anymore.” Her tone nearly managed to sound upbeat.
Rafiq could do little more than blink as crushing disappointment robbed him of his breath. His grip on Holly’s hand loosened and her fingers slid from his. Why was he so disappointed? This was exactly what he’d hoped for. A pregnancy would have only complicated everything between them.
So where was the relief that should’ve been instantaneous? The news should be cause for celebration, not bitter regret that ate at his gut.
He looked over at Holly and noted she seemed unperturbed, perhaps just a little tired if anything.
“Yes,” he forced the words out. “That certainly is one less thing to worry about.”
Holly gave a slight nod as her eyes closed again, but her mouth tightened.
“You should rest, habiba. Can I get you anything to ease your discomfort?”
There was a pause before she whispered, “No. I’ll be fine. Thank you.”
Rafiq hesitated. He wanted to stay and comfort her, pull her into his arms and hold her. But it was clear she was through talking and preferred to be left alone.
Biting back a weary sigh, he stood and once more left his room.
Beauty and the Sheikh
Shelli Stevens's books
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