There was a lot more than that to fix, but I couldn’t even think about the emotional stuff right now. If I stopped to admit how scared I still was and how much I just wanted to hide away, I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to make it through another minute.
“It’s going to be alright now,” he whispered.
Now was the start of the hard work to be okay but that was fine. I didn’t have to fight for my life now. I just had to fight to come to terms with having to do it.
“My parents and Jeremy are outside,” I said, tracing the letter S and N on his chest with my finger.
“They didn’t want to come in.” He said it as a statement not question.
“That’s not it. They’re giving us some time first.”
He looked away in shame. “I’m surprised they let you near me again.”
“They’ve been you, Noah. Don’t forget that.”
He raised his head and looked me in the eye. “They don’t hate me?”
“No one hates you.” Except probably every member of Eternal Light. “I want to help you.”
His smile was unconvincing, and I wasn’t sure if he didn’t think I should help because he felt guilty or if he wanted a clean break and was worried about ditching me. A clean break would probably be the most sensible thing to do, we had a lot to work through, but it wasn’t what we both wanted and if we left each other then Eternal Light would win.
Mum, Dad and Jeremy gave us ten minutes before coming in. They had nothing but sympathy and understanding for Noah. It made him uncomfortable. He didn’t think he deserved it. But you shouldn’t forgive and help someone if they felt worthy; you should do it just because.
“What’s your next move?” Jeremy asked. He was still mad at Noah but he was trying, and I couldn’t ask for more than that.
“I don’t know. I don’t have a plan yet,” he said. “I’m nineteen next month but–”
“What?” I asked, cutting him off. He wasn’t that old.
“Almost nineteen?” Dad said. “Noah, we thought you were sixteen.”
“That’s what I was told to be. My birthday is the same, Scarlett, I just lied about my age.” He closed his eyes and sighed. “I’m so, so sorry.”
I nodded. After everything that’d happened, him being a couple of years older wasn’t that big of a deal. “Okay,” I said, wondering just how much more there was that he’d lied about. I was sixteen, he was nearly nineteen, that wasn’t too bad. I was fine about it and understood that he was following instruction. Now I wanted to know the real him. But I doubt even Noah knew who the real him was right now.
Even if he didn’t know what his next move should be I did. “I want Noah to come home with us,” I said. The atmosphere thickened. Mum and Dad, although clearly not thrilled, couldn’t really say no. They were in the same position as Noah when they left the cult.
Noah shook his head. “No. After everything, Scarlett, you can’t ask your parents to do that.”
“She’s not asking,” Dad said. “We’re offering.”
Jeremy’s eyebrows shot up in shock, and I think mine did the same. I expected to have to chew Dad’s ear off before I got him to agree. “Jonathan, you’ve done more than enough for me already.”
Dad held his hand up. “You saved my daughter’s life. I almost stood by and let her be sacrificed, too.”
I licked my lips. I hated hearing about myself like that. I was nothing to my birth parents but the key to an imaginary door. It wasn’t a great feeling.
Noah breathed deeply and squeezed my hand. “I don’t know what to say.”
“You don’t need to say anything,” Mum said. “You deserve a life the same as me, my husband and children. It won’t be easy, believe me it’s a huge adjustment, but if you’re willing to put in the work then we’re willing to help you.”
Smiling, Noah replied, “Thank you. I’ll do whatever it takes. I want a normal life like everyone else. I feel like I’ve lost eighteen years, my whole childhood was a lie. I want to be a better person, to deserve Scarlett.”
I wasn’t even going to waste my breath commenting on that stupid remark.
“It’s okay. Your life starts now, and I promise it’s going to be pretty great from now on,” I said.
“Not too great, though, Scar, yeah?” Jeremy said.
My face caught on fire. I wasn’t ashamed that I’d been with Noah, I loved him, but I sure didn’t want my parents to know anything about it. Ever. “Ignore him,” Noah said, fighting a smile.
Twenty minutes later, Noah and I were left alone again while my family went to get something to eat. Well, sort of alone. A police officer was just outside the door. “Are you really okay?” I asked.
He smiled from his bed. “Never better. I get the chance at a normal life with the girl I’m crazy about. That is if you’ll have me?”
I shrugged. “Suppose. You did take a knife for me and all.”