Absolution

“Isn’t that crazy?” she croaked, as he blurred in front of her. “Because all this time, I just wanted to hide the physical proof of what happened that night.”

 

She could barely see him for the tears as he leaned over to cup her face in his hand. If he said anything after that, she didn’t hear it. She couldn’t hear anything except for the rush of air in her head. All she saw was a blur in front of her with Jack’s green eyes staring out at her. As he drew her closer, she held her breath. She had never wanted something so desperately and yet been so frightened and confused at the same time.

 

Then his lips touched hers, softly at first, then more firmly. The confusion seemed to lift, floating away on a gentle breeze that smelled vaguely of chlorine.

 

He pulled away, gently running his thumb down her cheek. “You don’t need to hide anything,” he whispered. Words disappeared. Thoughts, too. “Do you understand me?”

 

She found herself nodding, wishing he would kiss her again. Somehow, when they kissed, it was as if she were a different person – stronger, but more vulnerable at the same time.

 

“Come on,” he said huskily. “Let’s get out of here and go somewhere to talk.”

 

Immediately, the surge of strength deserted her and her eyes fell. Seeing his hand resting on her leg slammed the realisation home.

 

“Okay,” she mumbled, forcing herself to look him in the eye as he withdrew his hand from her cheek. “Maybe you should wait out front for me, though. It takes me a while to get changed.”

 

“It’s okay, I’m not in any hurry. Take your time.” He indicated her wheelchair with a quick glance. “Do you need a hand?”

 

“No, I’m fine,” she insisted, her cheeks suddenly hot.

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“I’m sure.”

 

He didn’t make any effort to move even though she wished he would, just so she wouldn’t have to do this in front of him. How long could she sit there before it was obvious? “Honestly, you should probably wait in the foyer. I could be a while.”

 

The words tripped over themselves. She knew from the look on his face, he wasn’t buying it.

 

“What are you scared of?” he asked finally.

 

“Nothing. I’m not scared.”

 

“Come on, Ally. Just tell me.”

 

She took a shaky breath, unable to shut him out any longer. “Why can’t I just meet you outside?”

 

“Because I feel like whatever you’re scared of is what we should do here.”

 

The sincerity in his voice chipped away at the protective wall around her heart. She shook her head slowly, fighting against the feeling of being discovered for the fraud she felt she was. “It’s not that easy.”

 

“Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t – but we’ll never know until we give it a shot. How about we do this slowly, take it one day at a time?”

 

She tore her gaze away from those eyes and concentrated on her hands, resting in the warm water on top of her thighs.

 

“And maybe today,” he continued, “All it means is that we leave the pool together.”

 

She nodded, not really listening. All she saw was Jack’s face when he had seen her practically naked on her bedroom floor.

 

“Come on,” he said again, reaching for her hand beneath the water. “Let’s get out of here. You with me?”

 

She looked up, nodding, and he squeezed her hand. He stood up and climbed the steps out of the pool. Heart pounding, she leaned forward and paddled away from the concrete steps and over to the edge. Glancing over her shoulder, she saw him walking towards the bench along the back wall, grabbing his towel. Seizing her chance while his back was turned, she pulled herself up and out of the pool, flipping over onto her back until she was sitting on the edge. Jack still had his back to her and was toweling off, so she reached back for her chair. She pulled her legs up into position and grabbed the chair frame, pushing herself up and into it. Not daring to waste any time checking on him, she made sure her feet were positioned on the footrest and hurriedly folded the second towel she had laid on the seat earlier, over her legs.

 

“See? That wasn’t so bad, was it?”

 

He walked over to her, his towel draped around his neck, smiling encouragingly.

 

Sure. Fine. Whatever.

 

She ignored him, leaning down to pick up her other towel off the concrete.

 

“I’ll meet you out front, okay?” she said over her shoulder as she headed towards the changing rooms.

 

“No hurry, take your time.”

 

She could feel his gaze on her as she made her way through the double doors and into the corridor.

 

How the hell am I going to get changed with my hands shaking like this?

 

 

 

“She’ll be fine – Jack was with her,” Callum said, throwing Maggie a sidelong glance.

 

Barney’s was unusually busy for a Sunday night, so the three of them were perched at the bar rather than at their usual table.

 

“Which is precisely where the problem lies,” Jane interjected, taking a quick sip of her drink.

 

“What on earth possessed you to let him go with you tonight?” Maggie asked.

 

“He said he wanted to talk to her.”

 

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