The snow was either going to start falling tonight or sometime tomorrow afternoon. The skies were coated with thick gloomy clouds. One big snowfall and the brown yard and trees would be layered in white, glistening snow. It would be beautiful. We didn’t always have white Christmases, but I had had enough to know that they made everything seem extra magical and special. I shoved my hands in my pockets and walked back into the house. Grey was going to miss it. He was going to miss all of this.
I reached for my phone. I had to try one more time. One more plea. One more desperate attempt to tell the man I loved that Christmas wouldn’t be Christmas if we weren’t together.
I watched the clouds swirl by. The phone rang until I got his voicemail. Crap. I couldn’t leave a message like that. I’d have to try him again later.
“Eden, what are you doing outside in this cold? And that’s not even a coat.” My mother stood in the doorway with her hands on her hips.
“I just wanted to breathe in some cold air.” I smiled and walked in the house. My cheeks were starting to feel numb, and they tingled once the heat hit them.
“The grocery store was a madhouse. I think this storm is going to be a big one.” She turned to unload the grocery bags. “I’m just glad we’re all together and I don’t have to worry about you flying in this or worse, trying to drive in it. I hope the snow holds off a little while longer though.”
I pulled out five pounds of flour and a bag of sugar. “I wouldn’t want to drive in this either.” I handed her the baking goods and then noticed there was a ham in another bag, along with two sacks of potatoes. Was she planning on an army for dinner? “What do you think about the caroling tonight? Will the snow be a problem?”
“Good thing about being in the neighborhood is that we don’t have to worry about driving anywhere. If you need a coat, you can borrow one of mine.”
I laughed. What was it about mothers and coats? “No, I’ve got one, thanks.” I was looking forward to seeing everyone tonight even if we were traipsing through the street in the snow.
My parents hadn’t moved since they bought the house when I was three. I couldn’t remember the apartment we had before. This was home. I grew up with the other kids on the street. Every few years someone would move out and a new kid would move in, but for the most part, these were the brother and sister playmates I never had. Caroling would be fun.
I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket and pulled it out. “Mom, it’s Grey. I’ll be right back.” I turned for my room and answered the phone on the way. “Hey.”
“Hey, what’s happening at your parents’?”
“Not much. Getting ready for the great Christmas blizzard.” I closed the bedroom door behind me.
“They calling for a lot of snow?”
“Yes.” I chewed my bottom lip. “But it’s not supposed to be here until later.”
“Ahh. Ok.” He paused. “Are you ok? You sound a little down.”
“Actually, I’m not ok.”
“What’s wrong, darlin’?”
“Grey, please just come up here.” There, I said it. I wouldn’t ask again, but I had to try. “I don’t like us being in separate states. It defeats the whole reason we moved in together. I know Mason wouldn’t care if you left for a few days.”
He sighed into the phone. It was so loud it felt as if we were in the same room. “Eden, we’ve talked about this.”
“I know we have and I thought I was ok with our decision, but now that I’m here, I’m not ok with it. I need you here and I can’t leave my parents. They need me here too.” I was almost on the verge of tears. This entire situation was brutal.
“Dammit, there’s a delivery.” I heard him cover the receiver, and there was a muffled conversation on the other end. “I’ll call you back in a bit.”
Before I could protest, he was gone. I stared at my phone. I had to accept it. Grey wasn’t going to be here for Christmas. We were going to wake up in separate beds, in separate houses, in separate states. There was nothing merry about it.
“Pumpkin, you ready?” my dad called from the hallway. He was holding an extra scarf and gloves. “Your mother laid these out for you.”
“All ready.” I grabbed the extra layer and looped the scarf around my neck. “Where’s Mom?”
“Oh, she’s next door. Everyone is meeting at the Greens’ and she wanted to take over one of those pumpkin loaves she baked.”
“Oh, ok.” I followed him to the kitchen and noticed the lights were on in the guesthouse in the backyard. “Why are the lights on in the guesthouse? They weren’t on this afternoon.”
My dad fumbled with the buttons on his leather jacket. “I’m sure your mom was just tidying up. We can get them on the way back. Come on. They’re waiting for us.”
I looked out of the window again. I was certain I saw the outline of a Christmas tree in the window. My parents loved using the guesthouse when company visited. There was one bedroom, bathroom, and an open room that included a couch and kitchenette. They decided long ago it made the guests happy, and family visits went a lot more smoothly when everyone had a little more space. No one had mentioned additional holiday visitors this year.