Great. Just . . . great.
“And . . . Zthane has asked me to personally debrief Kellan during the mission, if there’s time. Being the Guard’s lead Emotional, we need him involved. I know the timing sucks, but Chloe, over the last week, you’ve managed to take out three Elders. These things have been trying to kill our kind, not to mention the Métis for too long. We’ve finally got a way to defeat them.” His words are steady yet soft.
“I know,” I tell him. The familiar sting of tears threatens to surface, but I force them back. I’ve got to stay strong. I assure them both that this is fine, that I’ll get down to Guard HQ within the hour, but they don’t look too sure at my conviction. And rather than being pissed that they doubt me, I’m pleased by their concern.
It’s a good thing, having brothers.
It’s clear Kellan is torn about having to leave when he argues with Karl about finding a different Emotional to do the mission. There’s this anguished look that he allows me to see for just the smallest of moments; I think my own face mirrors his. After half a year, this is the closest we’ve gotten to each other—only to have him leave before we get to talk at all? But, in the end, he goes, because he knows it’s the right thing to do. So when he and Karl head to the door, I muster my courage, trail after them, and pull Kellan aside before he leaves. Thankfully, Karl gives us some space.
“If it’s okay with you,” I tell him quietly, “I’d really like to talk to you as soon as possible.”
An entire array of emotions flash through his beautiful blue eyes—sadness, happiness, anger, worry—before he carefully schools them into the undecipherable gaze I know to be his self-defense mechanism. I watch his right hand pull through his hair, shorter than the last time I saw him, and try my hardest to squelch the wish that nearly knocks me to my knees that it was my hand touching him.
“I’ll come over in the morning,” he tells me.
I want to hug him, but I don’t. I’m too scared. He takes a deep breath, nods his head, and tries to hide the pain in his eyes when he leaves. And it breaks my heart, just like it always has.
“You two really do look alike,” Will is saying to Jonah when I get back to the living room; mostly, I think, to cut through the unbearable tension in the room.
“Really?” Callie snaps. “That’s amazing. Identical twins typically look nothing alike.”
“Callie,” her mother admonishes, but Callie glares back and takes a so-there chug of tequila.
Will outrights laughs at Callie. It’s the wrong thing to do, because her eyes narrow dangerously.
“Don’t,” Jonah says to Callie. His hand is flexing over and over.
Will’s head tilts to the side, his own eyes narrowing now. “Why is it I get the wrong sort of vibe between you two? Has the incestuousness of this lot included something between you?” The press of his hand against my shoulder is filled with pity.
Good lords. This just keeps getting worse. Because, now Jonah’s eyes have narrowed and I’m wondering if I ought to turn the lights on so everyone can see without squinting.
“You’re an asshole,” Callie hisses.
Will’s furious. “Cheers. I believe it takes one to know one.”
Astrid and Cameron are nearly beside themselves when a full-fledged shouting match breaks out between Callie and Will. And I’ve never been the best peacekeeper, but these people here are my family, and I can’t let any of this devolve any further, especially since I have so little time to talk to Jonah. I shove my body in between Will and Callie, both hands pressing against their chests. “Will? Shut it. Callie? Same to you. Because your anger right now isn’t with each other, and screaming isn’t going to solve anything.”
Will storms away, muttering about the need to find more alcohol since the bitch stole his tequila. Callie’s grin is vicious as she purposely chugs another shot-worthy swig from the bottle.
“Look,” I say to Cameron and Astrid, “I know I am quite possibly the worst person ever when it comes to dealing with secrets and lies. But I’m thinking you guys need to talk to your kids, either together or separately. They deserve that.”
Astrid sniffles again, nodding. Cameron pulls me closer and kisses the top of my head. “Always the smart one, lass,” he whispers into my hair. And then, “You’ll be okay if Will and I go for a walk?”
The Dane boys had wanted to be here for me when I laid myself bare. I thought that’s what I wanted, too—their love and support. But I know I have it, whether or not they’re in the room with me or on another plane. They’ve got my back. They love me, and that’s not going to change just because I’ve made mistakes. And it makes all the difference in the worlds.