Witnesses aren’t allowed to view romantic or intimate moments. When the screen—isn’t that what she’d called it?—went blank, she must have come looking for me. What happened...hell, it never should have happened. I knew it then, and I know it now. And not because of Kat.
I’ve been a dead man walking since Kat’s death, and Milla helped bring me back to life. I owe her, just like I’d claimed to owe Kat. But if we’d had sex today, would I have offered her more afterward? A happily-ever-after I’ve only ever imagined with Kat?
Probably not. Because, even though we’re friends, I’m not falling for her. I can’t be falling for her. Yes, she matters to me. Yes, I’m borderline obsessed with keeping her safe. Yes, I crave more time with her—to talk, because she’s smart and funny. But I told her I wouldn’t hit and run. And committing to her, just so I can touch and kiss her... I can’t do it.
Are you sure? Temptation whispers. You’re still on fire for her, desperate to be with her. Only her.
Shut the hell up.
If our history is our foundation, then our foundation is built on blood, guilt and sorrow. Whatever we manage to build will come crashing down during the first storm. I’ll lose her, and I can’t survive losing another girl.
Maybe I’d be willing to risk it, though—maybe I’d be willing to risk everything—if Milla put me first. I put my girl first, and I expect the same from her. But River is and will always be her top priority. With good reason.
“Kat,” I shout. “Let’s discuss this. Please.”
She appears between one blink and another, tears streaking down her cheeks. “How could you kiss her?”
The first spark of anger burns through me. “You can’t have it both ways. You can’t cut me loose and act jealous when I’m with someone else.”
She flinches. “I’m not jealous. I just... I told you anyone but her for your benefit.”
I scrub a hand down my face. “I like her. She’s a good person, and she’s had a crap life. She’s my friend.”
“Do you usually suck the air from a friend’s lungs?”
“That’s no longer your concern, is it?”
“I know. I know.” She draws in a heavy breath, holds it, and as she slowly releases it, her eyes beseech me. “I want you with someone else, want you happy...but you can’t be with her, Frosty. You just can’t. Pick anyone else, and you’ll get my gold-star stamp of approval.”
Over the years I’ve faced zombies, toxin, injury and the death of loved ones, but this...this might be worse. “I said I would love you forever, and that hasn’t changed. I do, and I will. You’re one of the best things to ever happen to me, but you’re not my girlfriend. Not anymore. If I decide to be with Milla, I will. You don’t get a vote, and your stamp of approval isn’t necessary.”
“Frosty.” She clasps her hands together, creating a steeple. “Please, don’t do this. You don’t understand.”
“Kitten—”
“You remember my cousin Teresa, right? She’s smart and pretty, and she has—”
“Kitten,” I repeat gently but firmly. “Enough.”
“No.” She closes her eyes, tears catching in her lashes. “She’s going to... Frosty, Camilla is going to die.”
“Of course she is. Death is hereditary.”
“Yes, but her death will come sooner rather than later. Ali’s vision...” Kat’s voice goes soft. “Camilla will save you...but she’ll die doing it.”
The words reverberate inside my mind—she’ll die, sooner rather than later, she’ll die—and an unholy rage overtakes me. “Tell me everything you know about the vision. Every detail. Now.”
Kat flinches, but says, “You’re inside a building. You’re cut, bleeding. Cole, Ali and the others are lined up behind you. There’s a gun trained on you, held in a very feminine hand. A series of shots go off. Camilla moves in front of you and takes the hail of bullets.”
As she speaks, a thousand-pound weight settles on my chest.
“I never thought you’d grow to like her.” Kat’s eyes plead with me to forgive her. “I thought she’d get what she deserves, and that would be that. I made Ali promise not to tell anyone, not even Cole, because I thought the end justified the means. I wanted you safe. More than anything I wanted you safe.”
“So you did to Milla what we crucified her for doing to us? You decided to trade one life for another, Kat.” Damn her! And damn the entire situation. “I can’t imagine those higher courts would approve.”
“They approve of sacrifice,” she says haughtily. Then her shoulders droop and she adds, “When it’s by choice.”
“But you haven’t given Milla a choice, have you?” My bitterness is like a train that’s gone off the rails. A crash is inevitable.
“No,” she admits, “and for that, I’ll be booted out as soon as Camilla... When she’s gone.”
Gone. Dead.
I reel. I burn. “You need to go. Now.”