32 Candles

I couldn’t think of anything that I’d rather do less than walk down the aisle with a man who haunted my every unengaged, waking thought even though I could never have him again.

Still, Nicky had been a surrogate father to me. So I guessed I owed him one. Or several. And that’s why I ended up agreeing not only to be a bridesmaid in the wedding of my worst enemy and my best friend, but also to go and try on bridesmaid dresses with Veronica and Tammy. Seriously, go figure.





THIRTY

Three weeks later I found myself waiting outside my clients’ house for a field trip that had “excruciating disaster” written all over it.

At this point, my side business had turned into a full-blown career. After finishing up with Mike, I had helped his director friend, Hugh Phillips, with what turned out to be a minor bout of career ennui. After a week of living with him, I prescribed long walks and switching genres. That had led to a fevered adaptation of a German novel about a May-December couple on the verge of divorce. Hugh was so happy with how it all turned out that he recommended me to the writer who outlined the film for him.

I helped the writer get back in shape and finally stand up to his blue-collar father, who had a habit of calling him a sissy for making his money with the written word. Then the writer recommended me to a few of his friends. A couple of former power listers later, I was now living with a husband-and-wife team whose marriage and joint film-editing career were falling apart.

As it turned out, Hollywooders were totally cool with being guided by an admitted recovering psycho with no license. Who knew. And at two thousand dollars for the initial session and two thousand a week after that, business was booming. I acquired a used hybrid and put enough money into the bank to quit my job at the club. There are a lot of used-to-be-somebodies in Los Angeles, and I had a waiting list of would-be clients that could hypothetically keep me busy until 2011 if I decided to offer all of them what I was now calling my Career Therapy Services.

I had been forced to turn some celebrities down. There were a few initial sessions with people who weren’t quite ready to listen or work as hard as they would need to in order to be happy. But for the most part, I was finding plenty of crazy rich people to tell what to do and how to either get over their various mental problems or use them to their advantage. And can I tell you what else? I absolutely loved my job.

Which was why I was already resenting having to take a whole afternoon off from my editor clients when the Farrell sisters pulled up in Veronica’s Hummer. I got into the backseat and immediately felt out of place in my Strokes T-shirt and Bermuda shorts.

Veronica didn’t say a word for the entire trip to some high-end bridal shop in Beverly Hills. But Tammy talked enough for both of them, chattering on and on about how exciting this was, and how they had found the perfect church in Glendale. And did I know that Vera Wang was designing Veronica’s gown? They were so excited about that.

I glanced over at Veronica’s cold, unchanging face after Tammy told me that, and wondered if she hadn’t misjudged her sister’s enthusiasm for all these details.

But out loud I said, “Oh my God, I can’t believe that. Vera Wang, really?”

Yes, I was much more authentic these days, but I had always had a soft spot for people who dare to make conversation in the face of great tension. And it seemed too mean to ignore Tammy like Veronica was doing, though I was tempted, because Lord knew I did not want to be in this car with them. But I shook off all the negative thoughts, and smiled for Tammy. Today, I tried to convince myself, was actually a good day. Dreading this outing had meant that for once, I hadn’t woken up thinking about James. So maybe that boded well for the rest of my participation in this wedding.

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