Placing another foot on the floor, I roll the pillow off my face and look up at the ceiling, adjusting my eyes to the bright light that Leah turned on. I look at the clock and see it’s six in the morning. Hair and makeup people are coming at eight so everyone has to be showered and in their Spanx by then. Since mom and dad only have one full bathroom in the house, it could take a while.
The ceremony isn’t until noon but Leah wants to take pictures before then. Then of course, there are more pictures after and the reception starts at three. Leah and Adam even have an after party planned at McConaughey’s.
Man, this is going to be a long day.
I walk over to my drawer and pull out my undergarments for the day. I hear the shower running so I have to wait my turn. My dress from last night’s rehearsal dinner is resting on the rocking chair in the corner of the room. My parents hosted the party here at the house.
I spent a good portion of the evening retelling the same story.
No, I don’t play the violin anymore.
Yes, I moved to New York City.
No, it’s not just like Sex and the City” (At least for me, its not.)
Yes, I am working at a school.
Yes, I am seeing someone.
No, he is not coming to the wedding.
My grandmother was the most probing. She wanted to know about the “young man I’ve been seeing.” I assured her he’s thirty-two years old and has a full-time job. Never married, no kids . . . you know, the typical things grandmas want to know.
“Well, if he’s such a catch, why hasn’t he been snatched up yet?” she asked.
Because he has serious trust and abandonment issues.
But I didn’t tell her that.
Needless to say, last night was mentally exhausting but not unbearable.
I am gathering my toiletries from my bag when I look up to see Leah walk into my room with a glass of ice water in her hands and look disappointed because I am up and getting ready for my shower. She turns on her heel and exits the room.
I knew she wasn’t bluffing.
Leah and Adam’s wedding is absolutely stunning and completely romantic. Standing by her side in my crimson chiffon dress, I cried during the service because those two romantic fools wrote their own vows and if you didn’t believe in love, just watching Leah and Adam would have you writing sonnets to the first person you saw.
The look on their faces as Leah was walking down the aisle and Adam waiting impatiently for her to get to him was breathtaking. As excited as she was all morning, Leah was nothing but calm and composed at the thought of marrying the man she loves. Adam had tears in his eyes as she came toward him, the two wearing matching grins. When she made it to the altar they grabbed onto each other’s hands and I swear they’ve been glued to each other since. Eighty guests watched them exchange “I dos” and promise forever to each other.
Everyone should be loved as much as they love each other. Have I ever been? Lord knows I have felt more loved by a man in the last few weeks than I have in my entire life. He may not have uttered the words but Alexander has shown it repeatedly.
Maybe I was wrong for not fighting for him. Alexander’s never had someone fight for him. The man has abandonment issues and I did the worst thing—I abandoned him.
As soon as pictures are over and we make it to the reception hall, I run up to the bridal suite. I have to call him. I need to tell him I was wrong.
While Leah and Adam mingle with guests at the cocktail hour, I lock myself in the bathroom of the bridal suite and take out my phone. I let it ring.
And ring.
And ring.
Until I get voice mail.
He didn’t pick up. He always picks up the phone when I call him. Am I too late? Has he given up on us?