Falling Down

Chapter Eighteen
Jesse
Ten days later Blush has nearly all the songs ready for their album. They've been working steadily to get the right sound for the lyrics, learning how to work together, how to jam together, how to read one another, and so far they're doing pretty f*cking good.
I'd rather be in the studio than in this f*cked up stylist room Spenser, Carmen, and Simone set up but I knew I could trust them to not f*ck up my hair.
"What can we do for you today, Jesse?" Carmen asks.
I tell her what I want.
She nods. "Spenser's going to want to do this one if that's what you want to have done," she says. I told her I was ready for a change and I am. This long hair bullshit on tour is too f*cking hot.
"Well, hello Jesse," Spenser says. "Let's get you set up." He drapes a plastic cape over my lap and shoulders, snapping it in the back.
"Tell me what you're looking to do," he says. I relay to him what I'm looking for.
"This long hair under those lights while running across the stage is just too f*cking hot. I said at the end of the last tour I wouldn't be touring again with hair this long."
"No problem. I've got you covered. I'm going to spritz your hair with water."
"Cool."
"Just letting you know."
He wets down my hair and then starts cutting. It doesn't even bother me, getting the hair cut off. I'd just gotten too lazy to get regular cuts but now that we've got Spenser and the girls around and going to be on tour with us, I won't have to worry about making an appointment with someone who'll either f*ck up my hair or do the bullshit fangirl thing. Don't get me wrong, I love my fans. I do. But when I'm at a business establishment as a paying customer and instead of getting the services I made an appointment for I get squealed and gushed over, it tends to piss me off. Those are the types of fans that make me wary of everyone.
"Don't move. Time for clippers."
Damn, that was fast. It looks pretty f*cking good. I thought the dude only did makeup, but hell, he's done a kick ass job with this cut.
"You look like the Jesse Kingston from back in the day," Simone says.
"Yeah. I feel like me again."
Spenser smiles. "Lucy has a wonderful effect on people, doesn't she?"
"She does. She makes you want to be real."
"Mhmm. That's our girl. Alright, you're done. Let me show you the back." He swivels the chair and hands me a mirror. It looks good. It's tapered up in the back and on the sides and spiky and mess on top. Simple style. I can work with this.
I nod.
"You won't need to put any products in other than this gel," he tells me handing me a tube of goop, "unless you're going to be doing anything professional which we'll style for you anyway."
"Don't you even think of paying him," Carmen says. "Lucy pays us way too much as it is."
"You're valuable to her. She pays you what she thinks your worth."
"She's such a great lady," Simone says smiling.
"Yeah, and she's mine," I say with a wink.
"When are you going to pop the question?" Spenser asks.
I freeze. "What?"
"You know, propose."
"We just moved in together. I hadn't even thought about that. I doubt Lucy'd go for that now anyway."
"You're probably right. I don't think she's ready for that. She's pretty skittish. But if I was you, I'd get prepared, find a ring just so you have it in case one day you feel a sudden urge to ask her to be your wife."
"Oh, that's so romantic," Carmen says.
I start to break out in a sweat. I've gotta get out of here.
"I'm heading to the gym. See you later."
I swear I hear Spenser laugh as I book it out of there. He's probably jacking me around but he's right. F*ck. I mean, f*cking hell, she's such a huge part of my life now. I love waking up with her and falling asleep with her. We spend as much time together as we can and I never get tired of her being around. She's smart, funny, and so f*cking talented. I do miss her when she's not around, like now when she's practicing and rewriting notes while I'm getting my hair cut and lifting weights. I've only been away from her for an hour, if that, and I've done nothing but think about her. What the f*ck?
I'm in love with her.
I plop down on the weight bench, stunned. When the hell did I fall in love with her?
"Nice hair."
"Thanks."
"Dude, what's going on?" Ben asks.
"Nothing."
"Bullshit. You've got some f*cked up look on your face."
I rub my hands over my face.
"Shit," I say looking at Ben. We've never really had to talk to each other, somehow we've been able to communicate with just a look and right now he got my message as he sports a shit-eating grin.
"Finally."
"What?" I ask.
"You finally figured it out."
"What are you talking about?"
"You've been hooked on Lucy since you first f*cking met her in Chicago, but when you heard her singing and saw her standing on that fake stage, you were sunk pal."
"Well, f*ck. You didn't think to mention that to me?"
Ben laughs. "Would you have believed me if I had?"
"Probably not."
He nods and we sit in silence for a few minutes.
"What are you going to do about it?"
"I don't f*cking know. Spenser dropped a not-so-subtle hint about asking Lucy to marry me. What the f*ck? Marriage. I don't think we're ready for that. I know she's not for sure and I don't think I am either."
"Nah, don't rush it, bro."
"Yeah. Think I should find a ring just in case?"
Ben laughs. "I think it might be a good idea."
"Yeah, probably."
"You should probably tell her you love her first then go from there but, dude, take it slow."
I nod. "How do I tell her? I mean, f*ck." I stand up and start pacing.
Ben laughs.
"I'm glad you find this funny, f*cker."
"Sorry, I don't mean to laugh you just look like you're in a bit of shock."
"Hell yeah I am. I just sat here and realized I'm in love with Luciana Russo, academy award winning actress, god damn. Lead singer of Blush. She's so far out of my league it's not even funny."
"She is, but she loves you."
"Yeah?"
He nods. "I've seen her look at you the same way you look at her. She watches you when you're not looking. Sometimes she stares at you like you're a puzzle or riddle she's trying to solve."
"That's not very reassuring."
"It should be. It means she's taking the time to figure you out too, that she loves you enough to want to try."
"Huh."
"Get your ass lifting and stop thinking about it," Ben says as he turns on the radio and Korn blares from the speakers. Kick ass.

***~~~***

An hour and a half later, Ben and I find ourselves in the middle of Tiffany's. I'm really liking this haircut. No one's recognized me so far. They look at me like I seem familiar but they haven't figured it out yet. It's perfect for ring shopping. What the f*ck am I doing here? I'm not going to propose, not yet anyway. Just getting prepared before we get out on tour and life's too hectic to get away.
Marriage. What the f*ck?
The jeweler closes the shop at our request. We really don't want to get mobbed by fans while I'm ring shopping and I really don't want Lucy to find out I went ring shopping when she's in the grocery line and sees the Enquirer. Shit. That would suck so bad.
Bart is his name, the jeweler. He pulls out a large display of diamonds.
"Nothing too big. She's so tiny," I tell Ben. "Right?"
"Yeah, big wouldn't look right on her," Ben replies as his phone rings.
"Yo," he answers. "Yeah, sure. Why don't you come down to Tiffany's on Santa Monica." He pulls the phone away from his ear as I hear a high pitched squeal. "Stop it. Shut up. Yeah. No, we won't make a final decision until you get here. Yeah. Okay."
"Sera," Ben says. "She's borrowing my car but she's popping down here to help us pick."
"Jesus Christ, Ben."
"Chill. She asked if it was for later and I told her yeah. She knows."
"Good. I have no idea what to get her. I know platinum. I remember her telling me about this ring she saw and she said platinum is her favorite. She really doesn't like gold," I tell Bart who puts the gold rings back beneath the case and grabs more platinum.
"Jesus," Ben says. "How many carats is that thing?" He points to a huge square cut diamond ring that would probably have Lucy falling over.
"Sixteen carats."
"Crazy," Ben says.
"Some people enjoy the flashy," Bart says. "Personally I think understated always beats out overstated."
"Exactly," I say to Bart. "I knew you were perfect for this."
"Knock, knock," Sera says and Bart's assistant lets her in.
"Jesse, you sneaky bastard."
"Stop, Sera," Ben says. "He's already worked up."
Sera laughs. "This is so awesome."
"Bart here is our helper. We're going for understated not overstated and gaudy."
"Awww, you know our girl so well," Sera says.
I just grunt. I have no clue what to say to that. "Platinum. She likes platinum, she said."
"Yeah, platinum or silver."
"Are we looking for an engagement ring or a bridal set?" Bart asks and I have no f*cking clue.
"I think when the time comes, she's going to want to pick out matching wedding bands so just the engagement ring."
"Okay. Let's start with these," Bart says.
We look through the rings and they're not right. "These don't feel right for her. She's more… classic," I tell Bart and Sera grins at me.
"Exactly."
"Well," Bart says. "I think I have just the thing." He unlocks another display case and brings more rings over to us. "These are vintage style."
"Oh yeah," Ben says. "Those are more her."
I nod and look down and I see it immediately. I reach down and pick it up. Sera gasps, her hands fly to her mouth.
"Yeah, this is the one."
"Excellent choice," Bart says. "You've chosen the platinum tiara diamond ring with a princess cut diamond. With the accessory diamonds the total weight of diamonds is 3.42 carats."
"Get the matching band," Sera says. "She can have two wedding bands. This set is too perfect."
"I agree."
"Very good."
Bart starts talking about clarity and color and I don't know what the hell he's talking about but I nod along. All I know is this is Lucy's ring.
"With the wedding band, the total weight is 4.54 carats."
"Will that be too much?" I ask Sera.
"May I?" she asks Bart.
"Please."
She slips the rings on and oohs and ahhs. "It's beautiful, Jesse. Perfect. Not too heavy, not too flashy. The design of the platinum, the way it curves like that, she's going to love this. Look how it fits perfectly. Lucy and I wear the same size."
"Don't start crying," Ben barks. As if that's going to work. I send him a look like, are you f*cking kidding me? And he shrugs.
"I can't help it. It's just so amazing. Bart, you keep things confidential, right?"
"Of course. We are very professional."
"I thought so. You look trustworthy." She slips the rings off and puts them on the velvet square on the counter. She reaches into her purse and pulls out her wallet.
"Here," she says, thrusting a picture of Lucy at Bart.
"Ah, yes. She's quite beautiful and an amazing actress."
"You should hear her sing," Ben tells him.
"I'm sure I will soon if the press conference was truthful."
"True facts, Bart. Lucy doesn't lie."
He nods.
"Here's the story. It's so romantic. When we were in seventh grade…" She launches into the entire story of the crush, the fangirling posters, the party for the video, concerts, Chicago, the video, and the living together.
"They are such idiots," she says.
"Hey," I protest.
"You are. I mean even I knew you were in love with each other the first day on the set."
"Me too," Ben says.
"Idiots. Anyway, soon they'll profess their love for one another, we'll record our album, then we'll tour with our new band and open for Falling Down. I have no idea when Jesse will propose to her, but it's like a fairytale romance."
"Yes, it certainly is," Bart says.
I hand him my credit card and he rings up the sale. I don't even pay attention to what he said the cost was. I don't give a f*ck. Lucy's worth it.
Bart hands me the bag with the rings and certificates of authenticity and other crap I'll figure out later.
"Be sure to hold onto your dream, Mr. Kingston. It's not every day they come true," Bart says.
I nod. True story.

***~~~***

Sera agrees to hide the ring in her room since Lucy's in mine.
"I'll put it in my panty drawer. She won't ever go there."
"I don't even want to think about that," I tell her.
"I do," Ben says following behind Sera.
"What are you doing, Ben?"
"Following you."
"Why?"
"Because I want to… finger your silk and lace."
Seriously. My brother.
I walk into the kitchen to grab a soda and there she is. She's in those sexy-as-hell tight black pants that come to just below her knees and cling to her sexy f*cking body like a second skin. Her top is some short lacy thing and her belly button is peeking out at me, her piercing glinting in the sunlight.
"Woman, you look so f*cking sexy right now," I say, wrapping my arms around her and kissing her breathless.
"Wow," she whispers. "I'm all for being separated for short periods of time if you're going to kiss me like that when you come back."
"I'll kiss you like that any time you want."
"Smooth talker. I absolutely love your hair short like that, Jesse!" she bites her lower lip. "It's so hot."
"Yeah?"
"Mmm. Seriously sexy."
F*ck yeah. "Later, I'm going to f*ck you slow and easy, then after you come two or three times, I'm going to have you ride me fast and hard."
"Jesse," she whispers.
"Gets you wet when I tell you what I want to do to you, doesn't it?"
"Yes," she whispers and rubs her breasts against my chest.
"I f*cking love how wet you get for me."
"I love how hard you get for me. How you lose control when you're inside me and you can't help yourself."
I grunt. I'm starting to get hard. I need to change the topic.
"Whatcha making?"
"Peanut butter Rice Krispies treats and I'll put melted chocolate over the top."
"I hope you're planning on making a shit load of them because the guys will sow them down fast."
"Mhmm. I plan on making six pans. It's why I’m melting the marshmallows in the Crockpot. Mrs. Martinez is helping me."
"Clever girl."
"How'd practice go?'
"It was great actually. We're going to have sixteen tracks on the album. We just need to pick one more but we had an idea we wanted to run by you."
"What's up?" I ask, picking her up underneath her thighs. She immediately wraps her legs around my waist and her arms around my neck. I make my way out to the patio and sit on one of the loungers under an umbrella.
"I was wondering if you and the guys would want to record a song with us."
"Absolutely. That'll be perfect, actually."
"Mhmm. I was thinking," she murmurs, running her fingers through my short hair, "we can end our set with that song and then you guys will already be on stage. It's the perfect transition."
"We'll have to work out how to have two sets of drums on the stage. Some of the venues aren't that big."
"Do you think Trace and Xander would be okay using the same set?"
"I'm not sure. You know how it is with equipment."
"I know," she shrugs. "We can figure it out. Besides we'll need to write a song and we've only got two days left."
"Yeah, with ten of us do you see that being a problem?"
She laughs. "No, not at all. I've been very creative since you became my boyfriend."
"Oh yeah?"
"Mhmm," she says, circling my nipples, dragging her fingernail over the ring giving it just a shiver of a tug.
"I have to tell you, Jesse, we all work so well together. Me, Sera, Jace, Meggie, and Trace. We already know how to complement each other and it's just fantastic."
"That's awesome, Luce. That's the hardest part, you know. Finding the chemistry in the band, seeing if you can all blend together, and it sounds like you do."
"The first test will come next week when we're recording. Then the ultimate test will be touring. I hope we make it through the four month tour without killing each other or the band breaking up."
I chuckle. "You'll be just fine. I don't see Sera or Jace going anywhere. Meggie's already attached at the hip and Trace loves the sound and the laid back feel of the band."
She nods. "He told me he was worried there might be issues with drugs but then he saw how straight-laced we are and he relaxed." She sighs. "Do you think I'm uptight, Jesse? Is that what he meant by straight-laced?"
"No way. He just meant that you're not going to dip into the narcotics or opiate well."
"Yeah, no thanks. Not my scene."
I nod. "Mine either."
"I think it's amazing how well we get along, Jesse. It's been almost three weeks and you're my best friend."
"That's how it should be, babe. If we can't talk to each other about our bullshit, then there's something wrong."
"Truth. You're still okay with us staying here? We haven't even been looking for houses. I'm so--"
I cut her off with a press of my index finger to her lips.
"Stop. I want you here. The guys want you here. Mrs. Martinez already thinks you hung the moon and stars."
She almost preens when I mention Mrs. Martinez and I want to laugh, but I don't. It's important to her that there's no friction and I understand that need very well.
"I can't believe how much has happened in such a short time."
"Yeah."
She rests her head on my shoulder as she straddles my lap and I run my fingers through her hair. She sighs.
"This is nice."
"Mhmm," I say. My heart is beating a gazillion miles an hour and if she were to move her head just a little she'd hear it and wonder what the hell was wrong with me. Then I'd do something asinine like blurt out the fact that I love her instead of planning something romantic. But do I really want to plan out the way I tell her I love her?
I pull her closer.
"It's still early," Lucy says. "You think your friend could squeeze me in to give me a tattoo?"
"Now?"
She shrugs. "Why not? I've got nothing going on until later when we can all get together and knock out that song."
"I'll give him a call."
She runs her fingers through my now cropped short hair. "I really, really like your hair like this. Reminds me of the bad boy I crushed on."
"Yeah?" I say with a smirk. For some reason I think that's hot.
"Oh yeah," she murmurs seductively against my ear before sucking on the lobe.
"I think the bad boy you crushed on should meet your bad girl in our bed later tonight."
She sits up straight, surprise evident on her face. Then her expression quickly morphs into one of seduction and lust.
"I think that can be arranged."
I put a hand on the back of her head and pull her mouth to mine. I can't get enough of her. I slide my tongue against hers and moan at how f*cking good she tastes. There is no taste in the world like Lucy and I never want to be without it.
Someone clears their throat from the doorway. I take my time ending the kiss. F*ckers keep interrupting.
"What's up, Xander?" Lucy asks.
"Not much. Any plans for this afternoon?"
"Lucy wants me to take her to Harley."
His brows raise nearly to his hairline and I chuckle.
"No shit?"
"No shit," she replies.
"What do you want to get?" Xander asks.
"Well, truthfully I'd like about six of them but I want to start with two."
"Two?" I ask.
"Yeah, one is small. I just want to get some butterflies behind my ear."
"That's hot," I tell her and she grins.
"Dude," Xander fist bumps me.
"What's the other one?" I ask her.
"I want to get this floral design along my side."
"How big?" Xander asks.
"From my hip bone to just under my armpit. It spreads a little onto my stomach and back."
"Cool. That might take a couple sessions."
"I'd rather just get it done if he can do it today so I can go back in a week or two and get some of the other ones I want."
Xander smiles. "And another rocker is born."
Lucy smiles proudly. "I couldn't get tattoos before because of acting but screw it. If something pops up and they want me for the part, they'll have to deal with the ink."
"I'll call Harley," Xander says. "Think Sera wants inked?"
"Yeah, she'll want to go along," Lucy tells him.
"You're going to be sore later."
"We'll have to improvise," she tells me with a wink.
I nod. Her brown eyes shimmer in the sunlight, the flecks of gold and black highlighted in the sun.
"You're so beautiful, Lucy."
Her expression is soft, her eyes full of so much emotion.
"Jesse," she whispers. "I--"
"Dude, he said he's got the afternoon free. I'll go grab Sera."
"Sounds good." When Xander walks away, I ask her, "What were you going to say?"
"It's nothing. I should probably pee and get ready to go."
I nod. "You should keep that on. It's loose and won't cling to the tat when you're done. Jeans will likely rub if it's going down that low."
She nods. "I just need to change my bra. A sports bra won't hurt but these lacy ones are a bitch."
"They're f*cking sexy as hell, but I like them better on the floor. You've got amazing tits, and your body, those curves. I could lose myself in your heat."
"Damn, Jesse. You're getting me wet and horny."
"Yeah, I'm sporting a semi. I need to shut the f*ck up."
She laughs. "Let's go get ready."
I follow her up the stairs. This woman is everything I never knew I wanted and exactly what I need. F*ck, I love her. I want to stand on top of the Hollywood sign and shout it out loud. I want to go all caveman and claim her, then beat on my chest. She's mine. Later.
"Jesse?" she asks, pulling on her sports bra.
"What's up babe?"
"Is it going to hurt?"
"Some. Not too bad. Like a cat scratch."
"That hurts!" she says.
"Honestly after a while you get kinda numb to it and forget it's even happening. For me the worst was the black outline. For Xander it was the coloring. We'll see which it is for you in about forty-five minutes."
She climbs up my body and I chuckle as I put my hands under her ass.
"Monkey."
"You're so tall and I wanted to tell you something."
I nod. "Okay."
She places her hands on my cheeks, gently presses her lips to mine, then pulls back and meets my gaze. She pauses.
"You're just so incredible, Jesse," she says, shaking her head. Somehow I don't think that's what she wanted to say but I'm not going to call her out on it. Whatever's going on, she'll tell me when she's ready. If there's anything I've learned about this amazing woman who stole my heart it's that she can't be rushed because when she is, she runs. The last thing I want is for her to run from me. I can't seem to get her close enough as it is.
"You ready?"
"Yep," she says.
She goes to get down but I squeeze her ass. "I got you," I tell her.
"Yeah. You really do," she says. I'm about to tell her she's got me too, but Sera comes through the door chattering on about getting tattoos. Meggie falls in behind and I smile. We stopped locking the door during the day for this very reason--unless we're planning on getting naked.
"Grab my purse and Kindle?" she asks Sera.
"Got it."
I love having her in my life. Until her, I never knew what I was missing and I never want to go another day without it, without her.