Chapter Four
Mia
It’s early evening.
Two and a half very long days since I drove out of that Walmart parking lot, but I’m finally here, driving across the city limits and into Durango.
I’m stiff, tired, hungry and beyond crabby.
Apart from two nights spent in horrid motel rooms, all I’ve done is drive. Thank god for the radio is all I can say. I’ve spent entirely way too long in my car – more than any person ever should.
It’s my own fault. I could have taken a little longer to get here, but I’ve been on a mission to put as much distance between me and Forbes as possible.
I just need something to eat, then I want to lie down on a comfortable bed and sleep for a week at least, then I’ll put my big girl panties on and go to this address that I have for Anna Monroe and find out if my mother still lives there. After that…
I have no clue.
I’m leaving that one down to fate.
Sticking to the main road, I follow it into the center of town. I lean forward, which stretches my back out nicely, and peer through the windshield to take a look around.
It’s a really pretty place. Quaint with a homey feel to it. I can see why someone would want to live here.
Why my mother would want to live here.
Lifting my eyes to the skyline, I see the backdrop of the mountains.
Wow. Stunning.
Leaning back in my seat, I catch sight of a diner. It looks nice and clean. I’ll grab a quick bite to eat here, then find a hotel.
Checking the road is clear, I pull across and park up front the diner. I put my sunglasses back on before exiting my car. My black-eye is still looking noticeably bad.
Locking my car, I stretch my aching body out, then make my way toward the diner.
I push the door open and step inside. Glancing around, I see a lot of the booths are already taken, so I’m praying they can seat me right away. I’d skip eating tonight if I could, but I’ve not eaten much these last few days, and I can feel the toll it’s taking on my body.
A girl walks over to greet me. She is about my age, but half a foot taller with long straight brown hair.
“Hi, welcome to Jo’s. I’m Beth, I’ll be your server. Just a table for one?” she asks, glancing behind me.
“Yes. Just me.” I smile awkwardly. I hate the discomfort that comes with eating alone.
Beth grabs a menu from the hostess stand, and I follow her over to an empty booth at the back of the diner. She places the menu on the table in front of me as I slide in the booth.
“What can I get you to drink?” Her pen is hovered over her notepad.
“I’ll have a diet coke, please,” I answer while my eyes make quick work of the menu. I just want to put my order in so I can eat quickly and drive to the nearest hotel. “I’d like to order my food now if that’s okay?”
“Of course.” She smiles. “What would you like?”
“Cheeseburger and fries.” I was never allowed to eat this kind of food growing up. Oliver wouldn’t allow it, and of course, Forbes has an issue with it. He says the sight of a woman eating a greasy burger is disgusting. Or maybe just the sight of me eating one is what disgusts him.
This is the kind of food I eat in private. And now I’m about to eat it in public.
Freaking thrilling.
Tragic, I know, but nonetheless true.
“Sure.” She takes the menu from me. “Your food will be ten minutes. I’ll be right back with your coke.”
“Thanks. Um, I was wondering … if you could help…”
She gives a curious look.
I twist in my seat a little to look at her. “I literally just arrived in town, and I need a place to stay, so I was wondering if you could recommend a decent hotel?”
Her eyes appraise me, taking me in from the sunglasses on my face to the sneakers on my feet. It makes me feel uncomfortable and tense. I paste a smile on my face as I tuck my feet back under the table.
“Golden Oaks,” she says, putting the menu under her arm. “It’s the best hotel in Durango by far. It’s just up in the mountains. A bit further out than most, but well worth the journey.”
“How far is the drive?” The last thing I want to do is spend more time than necessary in my car.
I notice her watching my mouth, and realize that I’m pulling on my lip with my finger and thumb. I do it when I’m uncomfortable, or nervous. Which is often.
I lay my hand on the table.
“It’s just a fifteen minute drive – ten if you drive fast.” She grins, tilting her head to the side.
I let out a little laugh. “Do you have the address or street name? – For my GPS,” I explain.
“Sure.” She scribbles on the notepad in her hand, then tears off the piece and hands it to me.
“Thank you.”
“No problem.” She smiles, brightly. “I’ll be right back with that drink.”
***
I’ve just eaten, quite possibly the best burger I’ve ever had in my life, and now I’m back in my car, following the directions my GPS is telling me.
I’m feeling pretty proud of myself. There was a point back at the diner when I felt the pressing urge to overeat once I started in on the burger—stress catching up with me and trying to take control—but I held myself together and contained the urge. I ate what was on my plate, paid my bill and left.
That was a big achievement for me. I’ve never eaten food like that without purging it straight after.
Leaning forward, I glance around through the windshield.
Where in the hell am I?
All I’m seeing is nothing but road.
And trees.
And more road.
Lots and lots of winding road, going up and up, taking me further into the mountains.
I glance at my GPS checking the route. Yep, I’m definitely going the right way, and according to this, I should be there in a few minutes.
Only I’m still seeing nothing, and I already passed two other hotels on my way up here. I’m really starting to regret not stopping at one of them. I’m sick of driving, and I don’t want to be staying in the middle of nowhere, but Beth from the diner did say it was the best hotel here, so on I go.
A few minutes later I see a sign for Golden Oaks. Hallelujah! I actually do a little mini air-punch, I’m that relieved.
I catch site of the hotel from the main road. It looks pretty, and the backdrop of the mountains makes it seem even prettier. I’d probably appreciate it a whole lot more if I weren’t so bone tired.
I take the turn as directed, and pull onto a long driveway. Tires crunching over the gravel, I drive on until the foliage disappears and the hotel opens up in front of me.
It’s smaller close up. Pretty. And totally perfect.
I look around for designated parking, but there is none, so I pull up alongside an ostentatious red mustang which is parked on the grass just off the driveway. It looks like the type of car one of Forbes douchey friends would drive.
Forbes.
A shudder rolls through me at the mere thought of him. I’ve made sure not to think of him once in the past few days. Keeping my phone turned off has really helped with that.
Grabbing my handbag off the passenger seat, I get out of my car, and stretch out again. My body feels as if it’s seizing up. I just need to lie down on a soft mattress for a very long time. I’m really hoping the beds here are comfy because the last two motel beds have been horrendous.
Moving around my car, I pop the trunk and get my bag out.
The first thing I notice about this place is how quiet it is. Nothing but the sound of birds chirping in the background. Peaceful.
And perfect.
This place is starting to feel pretty close to heaven right now.
As I walk past the Mustang, I glance down at it and see that it has flames painted along the side.
Oh my god. This car is a definite penis enhancer if ever I saw one. I let out a snort of laughter and cover my hand with my mouth.
Stopping at the walkway leading up to the reception, I take a look around.
The hotel is a large wooden cabin style hotel, set on stilts which run down one side where the hill rolls down into what looks to be huge grounds. As I glance down, I see the building also goes down the side where the stilts round it. Maybe that’s where the owners live. Large windows reflect out onto a wrap around porch up top. Lanterns light the front, giving it a warm glow, and there is a pretty garden at the bottom by the walkway up to the hotel. As I move toward it, the fragrance from the wide mixture of plants invades my senses. I stop and inhale deeply, letting out a contented sigh.
I walk up the steps and onto the porch toward the reception so I can get checked into this place.
A bell tinkles when I push the door open. I step inside and find the place deserted.
It’s just as pretty in here as it is outside. A dark oak reception desk is situated directly in front of me. To my left is an open sitting room complete with huge unlit fireplace, and there are three plush sofas situated around the room.
It looks so homey. I have a good feeling about this place.
“Hello? Is anyone there?” I call out.
I don’t hear anything for a moment, but then I hear, what sounds like an elephant bounding up stairs.
Then, quite literally, the epitome of everything a girl like me should stay away from walks through the door directly behind the reception desk.
Lean. Tall. Tattooed – one of them covering the full of his arm. Dark brown hair, long, but not ponytail long; surfer boy long and hanging in his eyes.
Taking me in, he sweeps his hair back revealing eyes the color of maple syrup. I have the sudden urge to eat pancakes.
This guy is gorgeous.
Masculine…
Strong jawline…
Everything about him screams male.
He looks like sin.
Like hot, dirty, incredible sex.
Jesus Christ! Where did that come from? I never think of men and sex—or sex with men—in that way.
I realize I’m staring at him, so I open my mouth and speak.
“Hello.” I moisten my dry lips with my tongue.
Tattooed Adonis says nothing.
He stares at me like I’m an alien who just landed on this planet – like he’s not quite sure what to do with me, or why I’m here.
Maybe I made a mistake coming here. Maybe they’re closed for the season, and Beth got it wrong.
I’m ready to back up and leave when he speaks. His voice is as deep and manly as I’d expect it to be. It sends shivers coursing over my skin.
“How can I help?” he asks.
How can he help? This is a hotel, right? I’m tempted to step back outside and check the sign again.
“I, uh, need a room.” I move closer to the counter. “Beth, the girl at the diner in town? She sent me here. Said you’d have a room available.”
He stares at me for a long moment. I’m just starting to wonder if I’ve got something on my face, when I see he’s actually staring at my sunglasses. He’s probably wondering why I’m wearing them at night. Well, rather this than have him staring at my black eye.
He looks down at the desk in front of him. “We do. How long do you want to stay for?”
I almost sigh in relief that they’ve got availability. The last thing I want to do is get back in my car.
How long do I want to stay for?
“Um…” It’s my turn to look down. I shift on my feet, thinking.
I need a while to give me time to find my mother. And if I do find her, then I’ll need time with her.
If she wants to see me that is.
I wonder how long they rent rooms for. Looking up, I say, “I’m not sure … two weeks?”
“Are you asking or telling me?”
Wow. Okay. He might be good-looking, but he’s not very nice. But what do I expect? Forbes is handsome—more in a classic way than this guy here—and he’s the biggest a*shole of all.
Pulling on my lower lip with my finger, I swallow, then fold my arms over my chest, and steel my voice. “I want to stay for two weeks, and I’m asking if you have a room available for that long?”
He looks down at the booking sheet, then looks up. His eyes flicker past me before coming back to my face. “We do. It’s one hundred and seventy five a night.”
It’s certainly a lot more expensive than the last two motels I’ve stayed at, but it’s far nicer, and it’s not like I can’t afford it, courtesy of Oliver’s tainted money. And honestly, right now I’d pay anything to be able to sleep in a comfy bed.
“That’s fine,” I say.
He gives me a narrowed look, then draws a line across the book in front of him. He reaches into a drawer, returning with a sheet of paper which he slides across the desk and puts a pen beside it. “Fill this out with your name and home address.”
I pick up the pen.
Should I put an incorrect address like I did at the last two places I stayed? I don’t want a trace back to me in case Forbes is looking for me. And tied together with my name, he’d know it was me that has been here.
But then I’m not staying just one night like those other places. And it would look suspicious if I lie about where I live, and this guy finds out.
I decide to go with the truth and write my real home address and cell phone number down. Forbes won’t be looking for me way out here. I’m half-way across the country. Two thousand miles from home.
When I’m done, I hand the form back to him. My fingers accidentally touch his. Warm, rough fingers. Yet gentle. They feel good.
Deceptive.
Because men’s hands cause pain. They give hard, sharp slaps. They give black eyes. Grabbing, clutching, never-ending pain…
I pull my hand back quickly and wrap it into my other.
Face prickling, I look into the living area, imagining the fireplace lit. I can almost feel the warmth on my face if I just close my eyes.
“I just need your card details and we’re done. Your card won’t be charged until you check out.” Tattooed Adonis’ voice snaps me back to the now.
“Okay.”
I get my card from my purse. I hold it out for him to take, but he ignores me and instead starts fussing with one of those card devices. Then he hands it to me without casting a glance my way.
“Put your card in…”
I do as asked.
“And now your PIN.”
When I’m done, he takes the device back from me, eyes still off somewhere else.
I watch him with interest as he stares at the little electronic gadget.
He really is gorgeous. The more I look at him, the more handsome he becomes. I have never seen someone who is as physically attractive as this guy.
I bet he has women tripping over themselves to be with him. And I think he knows exactly how good-looking he is. I can see it in the confident tilt of his stance, and the air of indifference he exudes.
He removes my card from the machine, then hands it back to me. I slide it in my back pocket.
I see him get a key from a hook on the wall.
He steps out from behind the counter. “This way.”
I reach down to grab my bags, and with much effort, hoist them to my shoulder.
They feel way heavier than they did five minutes ago. Must be knowing I’m one step closer to a bed … one step closer to sleep, that has really set the fatigue in.
“Here let me get those for you,” Tattooed Adonis says, his hand reached out toward me.
Is he being nice to me? Why?
He wasn’t being nice a few minutes ago, and he has barely given me a glance. And in my experience, men are only nice when they want something. I have nothing to give this guy.
Retracting his hand, he scratches his head and frowns at me. “It’s my job to carry your bags. We’re not the kind of establishment that has a bellboy,” he says, then grins. A boyish kind of grin.
Oh, right. Stupid Mia.
I lift the bags from my shoulder and hand them to him. My body sighs in relief. “Thank you.” I smile.
A weird look passes over his face, then he frowns again. Slinging my bags over his shoulder, he strides off down the hall.
Okay, mood swing much? Nice one minute, moody the next. But then, aren’t all men like that? Some more than others.
I’m practically jogging to catch up with him, then Tattooed Adonis comes to an abrupt stop outside a door half-way down the hall. I have to catch myself from running into the back of him. He unlocks the door and goes in the room, turning the light on, and setting my bags on the bed.
I try to step inside the room, but I can’t. My muscles are frozen.
Being out there alone in the reception with him was okay because it’s a public place. But this … I can’t walk into this room alone with him. He could trap me.
The lock clicks.
I turn around.
Oliver is dangling the key from his hand. His belt in the other.
“Time for a lesson, Mia.”
My eyes search tattoo Adonis’ jeans. He’s not wearing a belt.
What difference does that make? He wouldn’t need a belt to hurt me. There are other ways to hurt someone. Many other ways.
Why did he go in the room?
To put your bags in your room. To do his job.
This guy isn’t Oliver or Forbes. He’s just some guy who works at a hotel. He’s not going to hurt me. Not all men all cruel.
I’m safe here. This is a hotel. There are other people staying here.
Actually, come to think of it, I haven’t seen another soul since I arrived. Only him. And there was only one other car parked up outside when I arrived. The Mustang – the penis enhancer – which could be his car.
Oh god, is that his car? Am I alone in this hotel with him?
That’s his car, and I’m alone in this hotel with him.
Chills shiver down my spine. I try to take in a deep breath, but my lungs won’t allow it. Panic is gripping my chest like a vice.
It’s okay, Mia. Calm down. There could be people in the other rooms. It’s evening. They could be settled in for the night. Or out and returning later. Just because there isn’t another car parked outside, doesn’t mean a thing.
Tattooed Adonis turns around. He tilts his head to the side, giving me a questioning look.
Can’t blame him. I am standing in the hall, acting like a complete weirdo, on the verge of a panic attack.
His eyes move down my body. Why is looking at me like that?
All my senses kick into high-alert.
I wrap my arms around my chest and straighten my back, trying to look taller and more confident than I could ever hope to be.
I can take care of myself now. I’m stronger than I used to be. I kneed Forbes in the balls and got away, didn’t I?
Tattooed Adonis walks toward me. My urge to bolt becomes compelling.
I am not weak. I am not weak.
I’m a strong woman.
I force myself to keep steady, and step back to give him space to pass by.
Tattooed Adonis towers over me. I knew he was a lot taller than me—not that it’s hard being that I’m pocket sized—but it’s so much more noticeable now he’s closer to me, and surprisingly, his closeness isn’t freaking me out as much as it should.
“Your key,” he offers.
I take it from him.
“Breakfast is served between seven and eight-thirty,” he states before walking away. Stopping, he adds, “And we don’t do evening meals, but there are plenty of restaurants nearby.”
“Are there any other guests staying here?” I have to ask.
He stops and turns back. “No. Not until next week. Until then, it’s just you and me.”
I’m pretty sure my heart just died in my chest.
Me. Alone. Here.
With him.
No. No. No.
I can’t do that. I am stronger than I was, but that’s pushing myself to far too soon.
“Don’t worry it’s totally safe out here,” he says. I’m guessing it’s the look on utter panic on my face prompting this. “We have a great alarm system, and I have a shotgun. You know, just in case.”
A gun.
God, no.
“What would happen if I pulled this trigger, Mia?”
I squeezed my eyes shut as I felt the cold metal press against my forehead. I could feel my body begin to sweat.
But I held myself together. Made sure not to cry. If I did, it only made him angry.
“I would die, Oliver.”
The gun pushed harder against my head. “Oliver!” he yelled. “You know to address me only as sir or daddy! How many times do I have to tell you this? How many lessons will it take?”
Shit. Shit. Shit.
I’m so stupid.
The gun retracted.
“I’m s-sorry, s-sir—d-daddy.” My voice was shaking as hard as my body because I knew what would come next.
And my fear was confirmed when I heard the familiar snap of his belt.
“I’m totally kidding. I don’t have a gun here.” The sound of Tattooed Adonis’ voice brings me to the now.
I need to be sick. Fear and bad memories are creeping across my skin, standing every hair on end.
I’m trying to stay calm. Stay normal. I don’t want to freak out in front of this guy, but it’s getting increasingly hard.
He lifts his hands in a gentle gesture. “No guns. I promise. No need for them, like I said, it’s a safe place.”
Breathing in through my nose, I pull on my lip and tuck my short hair behind my ear.
“Are you okay?” he asks, taking a step forward.
No.
Be strong. Stay here. You can do this, Mia.
“Yes. I’m fine.”
His stare on me is curious. Can’t blame him. I am acting like a nutball.
“Okay, well if you need anything, just press reception on the phone in your room and it’ll bring you straight through to me.” He turns to leave. “Goodnight, Mia.”
“How do you know my name?”
Looking back, his eyebrow lifts. “I got it from your details when you filled the booking form in.”
He smiles. It’s a really nice smile. Warm. Friendly. It eases me some.
“Oh, right. Yes.” I laugh, feeling a little stupid. “What should I call you?”
He smiles again. “Jordan.”
I turn to face him. “Is this your hotel, Jordan?”
He laughs. It’s a deep, manly sound that makes my stomach do somersaults. “No. My dad’s. He’s away taking care of my Grandpa at the moment, so I’m holding the fort.”
“Oh, nothing serious I hope?”
“No, just a minor op, but he’s off his feet for a few weeks, so Dad’s gone to take care of him.”
I nod. “Well, thank you. Again.” I smile at him as I back up and quickly retreat into my room.
I lock the door behind me and fall against it.
Deep breaths, Mia.
This is going to be okay. And apart from his snippiness before, Jordan does seem like a good guy.
Yeah, but so did Forbes.
I grab the chair I just spotted by the dressing table, drag it over to the door, and push it up under the handle.
Doesn’t hurt to be safe.
Turning, I take the room in for the first time. Really pretty. A four poster bed dressed in soft beige linens rests against the back wall. A large window is situated to the side, and on the far wall there are double glass doors. I go over to the doors and push the drapes back to peer out. I can’t see much; just the porch and the moonlight pouring over trees in the distance. I’ll check it out in the morning.
I double check that the doors are locked, then close the drapes, including the ones on the windows.
I stand in the middle of the room. The silence chills me, and my mind starts to overwork again.
Fear curdles inside and poisons me.
And I can’t stop myself from walking straight to the bathroom, kneeling down in front of the toilet, lifting the lid, and purging.