He was flummoxed.
Randy and flummoxed.
He rubbed the back of his neck. A part of him wanted to go after Cat simply because he’d been thinking of touching her all day. Touching her legs, her full breasts, the soft, wet place between her thighs. He would take her on her back, on her knees, every way he could imagine.
But it was more than that. More than lust.
He wanted her back. All of her. Her smile, her excitement, her challenging pride. He wanted the past they had shared, and the years they had spent apart. He wanted to soothe her heart over the loss of their child.
If only he could make her love him again.
Bloody hell, but he was a fool to have stayed away so long. She had every right to slam the door in his face.
Gifts. He would bring her gifts.
He certainly had a lot of treasures to give her. Damn his awkward pride that had hidden the bounty beneath his bed.
He dragged his gaze from the connecting door and pulled the small trunk from beneath his bed frame.
Please, let this work.
His offering in his hands, Jamie knocked on Cat’s bedroom door.
And waited.
“Cat,” he murmured when she did not reply. “Let me in.”
Finally she opened the door a hand’s width and peered around the edge. She wore her green silk dressing robe, her hair brushed loose around her shoulders.
“I brought you something.” The rough tumble of his voice sounded nervous, unsure. He did not care.
“Oh.” She opened the door as wide as her shoulders and peered down at the wooden box in his hands.
He cleared his throat. He did not know what he would do if she refused him. Try again tomorrow. And the day after that. “Might I come in?”
Cat stepped aside and he entered her room, then put the trunk down on her bed. She stood next to him and stared at the box as if snakes might leap out.
He rubbed his sweaty palms together. “Open it.”
“What will I find inside?”
She was so adorable. “Open it.”
It took forever, but finally she released the clasp and lifted the lid. The smallest boxes lined the top.
Cat flicked her gaze up to him and opened the first box. It contained a pair of hair combs. Carved from mother-of-pearl, they were shaped like small butterflies.
“I bought those in Persia.” When he had seen them in the market, his only thought was of how they would look in her hair. Not of how angry he was with her. Not of gossip and shame. He should have known then to come home. “Remember the day we rode by Shepton’s maize fields? Butterflies flew across the crops like living flowers. We stopped for a while to watch. Later, you let me take the pins out of your hair. I think I said your hair was more beautiful than maize silk, or some other such horrid poetry. You laughed at me.”
“Yes, I remember.” Shadows played across Cat’s face as she dipped her chin and studied the combs. “They are beautiful, thank you.”
“There is more.”
Slowly, almost as if she was reluctant, she opened the next box.
“That is from India. She is Saraswati, the goddess of knowledge, art and song.” Cat glanced up at him and searched his face. He smiled, wanting to put her at ease. “She reminded me of you.”
“Are these all for me, Jamie?”
“Yes. Every one.” Her hand felt cool when he wrapped it within his. “I never forgot you, Cat. Not once.”
She obviously didn’t know what to say. She withdrew her hand from his and unwrapped the miniature music box. She wound it up and it played a tinkling tune.
“Switzerland,” he said. “We danced to this waltz together at our engagement ball.”
She pulled her lower lip into her mouth and bit it between her teeth. Was she upset? God, he hoped these gifts worked. Not to bribe her, just to make her understand. “Do you like them?”
“I don’t know how to feel.” She touched the small figurine of an archer, still wrapped in gauze. “I suppose a part of me is jealous that you had all these experiences alone.”
He ran his hand down her arm, stopping when the calluses on his palm snagged at the soft silk of her robe.
“Why did you buy these things?”
“Because I missed you. And I saw you everywhere. And I suppose I wanted to share a piece of my experience with you.” There were still several gifts in the trunk. “They are a poor substitute, I know. But I did not want you to think I forgot about you.”
She seemed to be listening. Hope spread through his chest.
“Like an imbecile, I thought if I just got enough distance, if I just found the perfect distraction, my anger would go away. I realize now that I was a fool. A self-centered, righteous fool. I wasn’t even really angry anymore. I should never have let it go on so long.”
Cat’s lips spread into a smile. A glorious smile. For him. “You said the words, not me.”
“We are in agreement.” He dared to reach for her. “I was a fool.”
He wrapped his arms around her and she turned her face up, welcoming him. “Kiss me, Jamie.”