Because truthfully, he didn’t want to take her home. In the theater, with the peerage hovering above them, he’d suffered the constant fear of discovery. But in a place like this, it was so easy to imagine that there was nothing to fear. That she was just his sweetheart, and he was simply … himself. He wanted to revel in the illusion of honesty, if only for a while.
He chose a small table in the furthest, most isolated corner of the room. Once they were seated, a serving girl made her way to them.
“Have you beefsteak?” Julian asked her.
“Yes, sir. Also joints of mutton, and a very fine fish pie.”
“Is the beefsteak truly beef? You know, from an actual cow?”
“Julian!” Lily chided.
He raised a brow. “You never know in these places.” To the girl, he said, “Two of the steak, then. Ale for me, and spruce beer for the lady.”
“Spruce beer,” Lily muttered. “What am I, twelve years of age?” She motioned for the serving girl’s attention. “That’ll be wine for me, thank you.”
They waited in hungry silence. Looking around the room, looking at each other. Their gazes collided, and his face warmed with an unaccountable blush. God, he truly was like a youth again.
“I’ve just decided something,” she said. “What to name the parrot.”
Please, not “Julian.” Please, not “Julian.” He couldn’t bear to think that once he was gone from her life, his legacy wore feathers. Better to be forgotten entirely.
“I’m going to call it Tartuffe.”
He chuckled with relief. “Excellent choice. Very clever.”
After another minute, their food and drink arrived.
“There’s something I’ve been meaning to ask you,” she said, sawing away at her steak. “I’ve been putting the subject off, but I suppose I feel emboldened tonight. There’s no one in this place to overhear.” She gulped her wine, then stared into it. “This helps, too.”
Julian wondered what in the world she was on about. He was a little afraid to find out.
“Did my brother have a … Well, did he have someone special?”
“What do you mean?”
“You know, a …” Her cheeks colored. “I truly don’t mean to be nosy, and I don’t want details. It’s just that if Leo had a longstanding … you know. Someone who perhaps depended on him financially? I would like to set aside a legacy from the estate, but it must be done before my cousin arrives in England.”
Julian shook his head slowly. “I don’t know.” It was the truth, and he’d never been more blissful in ignorance. Of all the conversations he wouldn’t want to have with Lily.
To be sure, there’d been many nights when he and Leo met for drinks at the club and then pointedly went their separate ways. But they’d never discussed details. Julian had always avoided asking about Leo’s affaires because he’d rather not open the topic of his own. Leo was a principled, loyal sort. While Julian had his reasons for pursuing the women he did, he wasn’t especially proud of himself for it. He would have felt downright shabby discussing his conquests with Leo. Though he’d never explicitly asked, he’d always assumed Leo had a regular mistress whom he kept housed and comfortable somewhere in Town. That was why Julian had been surprised to hear of Leo approaching a Covent Garden prostitute on the night of his death. It seemed so out of character, and now Julian wasn’t sure of anything.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “If he did have someone, I don’t know her name.”
“Oh. Well, I had to ask.” She reached for her wine again.
As she drank, Julian relaxed, pleased to escape this topic of conversation unscathed. He cut a large bite of steak and stuffed it into his mouth, just to preclude further inquiry.
Lily gave her own meat a thoughtful jab with her fork. “I’m thinking of taking a lover.”
He choked on his steak.
Her eyebrows lifted. “What? People do it all the time. You do it all the time. Why shouldn’t I?”
Julian could think of a hundred reasons, but they were all currently dammed behind an unchewed hunk of beef. For the moment, he couldn’t speak—only listen.
“I know what you’ll say,” she went on. “You’re so convinced I should marry. But I don’t want to settle down, Julian. I want to live. When we kissed this afternoon, it was magical. I feel awakened now. And not roused by the first rays of dawn, either. It’s like my eyes have snapped open to greet the full light of noon. Everyone else is out there living, and I’ve been sleeping the day away.”
She put down her knife and fork. The edge of her cloak slipped back, exposing her pale, perfect shoulder and a wispy peach-colored sleeve. With her fingertip, she traced the edge of her wineglass, circling round and round in a seductive manner.
“Yes,” she said. “I think taking a lover will be just the thing.”
Good Lord. What had he done?
Three Nights with a Scoundrel (Stud Club #3)
Tessa Dare's books
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- A Lady by Midnight (Spindle Cove #3)
- Beauty and the Blacksmith (Spindle Cove #3.5)
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- Twice Tempted by a Rogue (Stud Club #2)