The Stand

Stu, who was sitting on the edge of a rock barbecue pit, waved and shouted. After a minute Harold saw him, waved back, and began to putt over in second gear.

After the afternoon the three of them had put in, Stu felt considerably better about Harold... better than he ever had, in fact. Harold's idea had been a damn good one even if it hadn't panned out. And Harold had insisted on taking the Nederland road... must have been pretty cold in spite of his heavy jacket. As he pulled up, Stu saw that Harold's perpetual grin looked more like a grimace; his face was strained and too white. Disappointed that things hadn't worked out better, Stu guessed. He felt a sudden flush of guilt at the way he and Frannie had treated Harold, as if his constant grin and his overfriendly way with people was some kind of camouflage. Had they ever really considered the idea that the guy might just be trying to turn over a new leaf, that he might be going at it a little strangely just because he had never tried to do such a thing before? Stu didn't guess they had.

"Nothing at all, huh?" he asked Harold, jumping nimbly down from the top of the barbecue pit.

"De nada," Harold said. The grin reappeared, but it was automatic, without strength, like a rictus. His face still looked strange and deadly pale. His hands were stuffed in the pockets of his jacket.

"Never mind. It was a good idea. For all we know, she's back in her house right now. If not, we can look again tomorrow."

"That might be like looking for a body."

Stu sighed. "Maybe... yeah, maybe. Why don't you come back to supper with me, Harold?"

"What?" Harold seemed to flinch back in the gathering gloom under the trees. His grin looked more strained than ever.

"Supper," Stu said patiently. "Look, Frannie'd be glad to see you, too. That's no shit. She really would."

"Well, maybe," Harold said, still looking uncomfortable. "But I'm... well, I had a thing for her, you know. Maybe it's best if we... just let it go for now. Nothing personal. The two of you go well together. I know that." His smile shone forth with renewed sincerity. It was infectious; Stu answered it.

"Your choice, Harold. But the door's open, anytime."

"Thanks."

"No, I got to thank you," Stu said seriously.

Harold blinked. "Me?"

"For helping us hunt when everybody else decided to let nature take her course. Even if it didn't come to nothing. Will you shake with me?" Stu put his hand out. Harold stared at it blankly for a moment, and Stu didn't think his gesture was going to be accepted. Then Harold took his right hand out of his jacket pocket - it seemed to catch on something, the zipper, maybe - and shook Stu's hand briefly. Harold's hand was warm and a little sweaty.

Stu stepped in front of him, looking down the drive. "Ralph should be here by now. I hope he didn't have an accident coming down that frigging mountain. He... there he is now."

Stu walked out to the side of the road; a second headlamp was now flashing up the drive and playing hide-and-seek through the screening trees.

"Yes, that's him," Harold said in an odd flat voice behind Stu.

"Someone with him, too."

"Wh-what?"

"There." Stu pointed to a second motorcycle headlamp behind the first.

"Oh." That queerly flat voice again. It caused Stu to turn around.

"You okay, Harold?"

"Just tired."

The second vehicle belonged to Glen Bateman; it was a low-power moped, the closest to a motorcycle that he would come, and it made Nadine's Vespa look like a Harley. Behind Ralph, Nick Andros was riding pillion. Nick had an invitation for all of them to come back to the house he and Ralph shared to have coffee and/or brandy. Stu agreed but Harold begged off, still looking strained and tired.

He's so goddam disappointed, Stu thought, and reflected that it was not only the first sympathy he had probably ever felt for Harold, but also that it was long overdue. He renewed Nick's invitation himself, but Harold only shook his head and told Stu he was shot for the day. He guessed he would go home and get some sleep.

By the time he got home, Harold was shaking so badly he could barely get his key in the front door. When he did get the door open, he darted in as if he suspected a maniac might be creeping up the walk behind him. He slammed the door, turned the lock, shot the bolt. Then he leaned against the door for a moment with his head back and his eyes shut, feeling on the verge of hysterical tears. When he had a grip on himself again, he felt his way down the hall to the living room and lit all three gas lanterns. The room became bright, and bright was better.