The Program (The Program #1)

CHAPTER FIVE

LACEY HAS TAKEN UP PERMANENT RESIDENCE ACROSS from me at the lunch table, always sharing her cupcakes, always entertaining me with her stories about guys. I haven’t been back to the Wellness Center since that first time, and Lacey hasn’t mentioned meeting her there again. I just hope my mother will eventually let her come over to our house.

“Oh,” Lacey says, biting into the orange frosting. “I ended up having coffee with a new guy last night.” She beams.

“Really?” I have to admit, I’m a little jealous. The thought of going out on a date sounds so exciting, so free. Even if I were allowed to date, I’d have to take Kevin along. How creepy would that be?

“He’s cute,” Lacey starts. “He has a car, and best of all, he’s over eighteen.”

“So no Program?”

“Right. He’s so freaking normal I’d say he was boring, but right now I don’t mind. He knows how to kiss.”

I laugh. “I think that may be the real reason you like him.”

“It’s not funny,” she says, tossing a rolled-up straw wrapper at me. “Overusage of tongue is a serious problem. I think that’s the real epidemic here.”

I’m cracking up. Kevin stands more alert from the side of the room as he watches us, but I can’t stop.

“And yes, part of why I like him is his technique. But I have plenty of other reasons, too.” She grins. “He’s really nice to look at.”

“Wow,” I say. “With so much in common, I think you may be soul mates.”

“Oh, shut up.” She laughs. “I’ll tell you one thing,” she says, getting more serious. “The minute I graduate, I’m out of this town. Out of this state. I hear that back east they’ve contained the outbreak without The Program. Think of all the normal people who’ll be walking around there.”

I widen my eyes. “They’ve contained it? I didn’t hear that.”

“It’s not mainstream news,” she says, sipping from her drink. “Total underground, but it’s for real.” She smiles. “Maybe you’ll come with me.”

“I’d have to take Kevin with me,” I say, motioning toward my handler.

Lacey seems to consider this. “He can come,” she murmurs, running her gaze over him. “I like blonds.”

Kevin notices us eying him. Lacey laughs and turns back to her cupcake.

“So,” I ask a few minutes later. “Did you keep any friends from The Program?”

Lacey shakes her head. “Nope. They were all pretty lame.” She glances up at me mischievously. “Are you thinking of finding your friend—the one with benefits?”

“He didn’t have those kind of benefits, and yes, I’m thinking about it. Do you think I should? Do you think it could make me sick again?”

Lacey’s expression darkens. “I wish I knew what makes us sick, Sloane. But we don’t know. And neither do they. I say you go find him. You deserve to live the life you want.” There’s a hint of tragedy in her voice, as if she’s wondered about getting sick again before.

Over Lacey’s shoulder I notice James Murphy watching us, and there’s a twist in my stomach, both anxious and excited. Lacey must read it because she turns around and sees him, and then looks back to me.

“I knew you liked him.”

“No, I don’t,” I answer quickly. “It’s just that he doesn’t seem to want to talk to me, and to be honest, it makes him that much hotter.” We both laugh.

“Well, trust me,” she says, crumpling her wrappers, “James may be hot, but he’s a troublemaker. Someone like him could get you flagged again. So make sure you enjoy him for what he is: eye candy.” She winks and then walks away.

? ? ?

At the end of the day I’m at my locker, but Kevin is nowhere in sight. I consider waiting for him, but then I realize I’m happy to be on my own. I hurry outside. It’s my handler’s responsibility to find me, not vice versa.

It’s a nice day out. The sun is warm in a cloudless sky and I actually enjoy the walk. A few people look at me, as if realizing I shouldn’t be unescorted, but they still say hi to me. It isn’t until I’m a few blocks away that I realize how truly far my house is. Maybe I should call my mother for a ride.

“Hey. It’s Sloane, right?”

I’m startled by the voice and turn to the street as a car slows next to me. I duck to look in the passenger window and abruptly stop on the sidewalk. “Yeah.”

“I’m James,” he says. “You know, the one you stare at in class.”

My cheeks warm, but I try to play it off. “I don’t stare at you.”

He smiles to himself, clearly knowing that I do. “So can I give you a ride somewhere?”

I’m embarrassed and not sure this is a good idea at all. Kevin had said to stay away from James, that he was on a self-destructive path. “We’re not supposed to talk to each other,” I say.

“Really? Well, if you’d like we can drive in complete silence.”

I laugh, adjusting the strap of my backpack on my shoulder. “This your car?” I ask.

“Nope. Does that mean you’ll get in?”

“I shouldn’t take rides from strangers,” I say. James lowers his eyes, his playfulness fading. “But . . . ,” I continue. “You seem harmless enough.”

He looks surprised. “I do?”

“No. You look like you’re going to cause me a lot of problems. But it’s a long walk home.” I step off the curb and open the passenger door. He doesn’t say anything as we pull away, and when we pass the turn for my house, I don’t tell him. I clear my throat.

“Do you think they follow us?” I ask.

“Who?”

“The handlers.”

James taps his thumb on the steering wheel as he takes a left onto the main road, passing all the car dealerships and restaurants. “Yes. But not today. They all rushed off to the high school, some big incident they’re trying to keep quiet.”

“Is that where my handler went? I thought he just got tired of me.”

“He definitely could have.” James smiles. “You seem like the pain-in-the-ass sort—a twinkle in your eye. But more likely he was Tasing someone in the hallway. He’ll probably drive by your house later. They still drive by mine sometimes.”

“Oh.” I honestly didn’t know that Kevin drove by my house, and it makes me a bit uneasy. “So what do you think they’ll do if they see us together?”

“Nothing. What are they going to do—spank us?” He chuckles.

“They could put us back in—”

“Sloane,” James interrupts. “Are you hungry? Maybe we could hit Denny’s or something. I like pancakes.”

“People will see us at Denny’s,” I answer quietly.

“Right, good point.” He turns to smile at me, but it seems strained, as if his confidence is just an act. “McDonald’s drive-through?”

“Why did you really offer me a ride home?” I ask, my curiosity too much. James has ignored me since standing up for me at the Wellness Center, and now he’s talking to me. Driving me around.

He shrugs. “I don’t know.”

“Then why did you—”

“I really don’t know. I don’t want friends, Sloane. I just want to graduate and get the hell out of here.” He exhales, staring out the windshield. “And then you show up, watching me with your big brown eyes. Looking at me like you know me.”

“I don’t know you.”

“And I don’t know you. So why did I care that that a*shole was being mean to you outside on the patio that night? Why have I worried about you since? Can you explain it?” He sounds frustrated, and I realize that he has the same conflicting feelings that I do. Emotions that are there, but without cause. Feelings that aren’t attached to memories and therefore meaningless. I’m suddenly scared and think about James being high-risk.

“I’m on Hillsdale Drive,” I murmur. “You passed my street a while back.”

James makes a sound like he’s about to say something, but instead he makes a hard U-turn and drives us back in the direction of my house. He doesn’t talk, and the tension grows. A pain starts to work through my body, a dread. An ache. I want to get far away from James Murphy because I think he may be the cause of it. I feel . . . sick.

When he stops in front of my driveway, I move quickly to get out. I toss back a thank-you and hurry toward my front door, glad my parents aren’t home to see me so flustered. When I get on the porch, I glance over my shoulder. The car is still there, James is talking to himself and looking pissed. I pause right where I am as I watch him wipe roughly at his cheek and pull away.