Of course, that was when Walter woke up.
“Uuuh,” he groaned, just a whisper. “Gladdie?”
With a groan of my own, I rolled toward him. The pain in my leg made me wince, but I couldn’t twist my torso. I reached out to him, found his hand.
“Here,” I whispered.
“Ahh,” Walter sighed in relief.
Doc hushed the men who began to protest. “Wanda’s given up sleep and peace to help him through the pain. Her hands are bruised from holding his. What have you done for him?”
Walter groaned again. The sound began low and guttural but turned quickly to a high-pitched whimper.
Doc winced. “Aaron, Andy, Wes… would you, ah, go get Sharon for me, please?”
“All of us?”
“Get out,” Jeb translated.
The only answer was a shuffling of feet as they left.
“Wanda,” Doc whispered, close beside my ear. “He’s in pain. I can’t let him come all the way around.”
I tried to breathe evenly. “It’s better if he doesn’t know me. It’s better if he thinks Gladdie is here.”
I pulled my eyes open. Jeb was beside Walter, whose face still looked as if he slept.
“Bye, Walt,” Jeb said. “See you on the other side.”
He stepped back.
“You’re a good man. You’ll be missed,” Jared murmured.
Doc was fumbling in the package of morphine again. The paper crackled.
“Gladdie?” Walt sobbed. “It hurts.”
“Shhh. It won’t hurt much longer. Doc will make it stop.”
“Gladdie?”
“Yes?”
“I love you, Gladdie. I’ve loved you my whole life long.”
“I know, Walter. I—I love you, too. You know how I love you.”
Walter sighed.
I closed my eyes when Doc leaned over Walter with the syringe.
“Sleep well, friend,” Doc murmured.
Walter’s fingers relaxed, loosened. I held on to them—I was the one clinging now.
The minutes passed, and all was quiet except my breathing. It was hitching and breaking, tending toward quiet sobs.
Someone patted my shoulder. “He’s gone, Wanda,” Doc said, his voice thick. “He’s out of pain.”
He pulled my hand free and rolled me carefully out of my awkward position into one that was less agonizing. But only slightly so. Now that I knew Walter wouldn’t be disturbed, the sobs were not so quiet. I clutched at my side, where it throbbed.
“Oh, go ahead. You won’t be happy otherwise,” Jared muttered in a grudging tone. I tried to open my eyes, but I couldn’t do it.
Something stung my arm. I didn’t remember having hurt my arm. And in such a strange place, just inside my elbow…
Morphine, Melanie whispered.
We were already drifting now. I tried to be alarmed, but I couldn’t be. I was too far gone.
No one said goodbye, I thought dully. I couldn’t expect Jared… but Jeb… Doc… Ian wasn’t here…
No one’s dying, she promised me. Just sleeping this time…
When I woke, the ceiling above me was dim, starlit. Nighttime. There were so many stars. I wondered where I was. There were no black obstructions, no pieces of ceiling in my view. Just stars and stars and stars…
Wind fanned my face. It smelled like… dust and… something I couldn’t put my finger on. An absence. The musty smell was gone. No sulfur, and it was so dry.
“Wanda?” someone whispered, touching my good cheek.
My eyes found Ian’s face, white in the starlight, leaning over me. His hand on my skin was cooler than the breeze, but the air was so dry it wasn’t uncomfortable. Where was I?
“Wanda? Are you awake? They won’t wait any longer.”
I whispered because he did. “What?”
“They’re starting already. I knew you would want to be here.”
“She comin’ around?” Jeb’s voice asked.
“What’s starting?” I asked.
“Walter’s funeral.”
I tried to sit up, but my body was all rubbery. Ian’s hand moved to my forehead, holding me down.
I twisted my head under his hand, trying to see…
I was outside.
Outside.
On my left, a rough, tumbled pile of boulders formed a miniature mountain, complete with scrubby brush. On my right, the desert plain stretched away from me, disappearing in the darkness. I looked down past my feet, and I could see the huddle of humans, ill at ease in the open air. I knew just how they felt. Exposed.
I tried to get up again. I wanted to be closer, to see. Ian’s hand restrained me.
“Easy there,” he said. “Don’t try to stand.”
“Help me,” I pleaded.
“Wanda?”
I heard Jamie’s voice, and then I saw him, his hair bobbing as he ran to where I was lying.
My fingertips traced the edges of the mat beneath me. How did I get here, sleeping under the stars?
“They didn’t wait,” Jamie said to Ian. “It will be over soon.”
“Help me up,” I said.
Jamie reached for my hand, but Ian shook his head. “I got her.”
Ian slid his arms under me, very careful to avoid the worst of the sore spots. He pulled me up off the ground, and my head spun like a ship about to capsize. I groaned.