He’s just putting on a show, I told myself.
“So, what are you saying?” I asked. “The Dukes don’t think I’m working? Is that why they’re sending every Neph to question me and fight me?”
His pause at my mention of other Neph was minuscule, but I knew him well enough to catch it.
“Just covering all the bases. They know you’re pushing alcohol, but you weren’t exactly a well-rounded worker at that summit, yeah?”
“That was a year and a half ago,” I ground out. “I’m very well-rounded now.”
“Prove it.”
His mouth hit mine with a wave of warm, citrusy pheromones and his body pressed me to the wall. I’d forgotten about my shoulder blade until a dull crest of pain coursed through me, and I whimpered. I felt him hesitate, as if he might stop to ask what was wrong, but then he kept going.
I wanted to sink into the touch of him, but a disgusting gurgling purr sounded in my brain from the whisperer, who was watching way too closely. Kaidan broke from the kiss long enough to glare at the spirit.
“Bit of a turnoff when you do that,” he told it. “Mind shutting up?” The whisperer snarled, and Kaidan was kissing me again—hard, firm kisses.
This was nothing like the making out we’d done at his apartment in L.A. He was all physical business now—nothing more. I trusted him, but my feelings wavered as clothes began to shed. He took his shirt off in one swift move. When he reached for my shirt, I wanted so badly to stop him because I wasn’t wearing a bra. I forced myself not to protest or cover myself as he unceremoniously yanked the top over my head and kissed my mouth again, roughly, pure lust, our bare chests touching.
The desperate, self-conscious part of me wondered what he thought of my body. It was strange not to have him taking time to savor me like I knew he could. Like I knew he enjoyed.
At that moment I imagined I could smell the rancid breath of the whisperer in our space, making me bitter and nervous. We had to get that thing away from us.
Kaidan’s mouth found the curve where my shoulder met my neck, and I felt his warm hands dip fully into the back of my pajama bottoms, his hands cupping my butt, pushing my underwear down my thighs.
My heart rate tripled. How far was he going to let this go?
“Take them off,” he said.
For the first time I hesitated and wanted to cry. I’d always wondered if I’d be naked with Kaidan someday, but never under these circumstances. Unleashing my emotions, I snapped, “You don’t have to be such an ass.”
His brief laugh was a dark sound as he pushed me onto the bed, grasping my bottoms and pulling them down my legs, tossing them away and leaving me bare. His whole body tensed as his eyes landed on the faded, greenish bruises across my shins. A quick survey of my skin showed I had bruises everywhere. Kaidan recovered quickly, his jaw set in hard lines.
He kept his eyes on my knees or stomach after that. The red badge at his sternum was as large as I’d ever seen it, spinning and pulsing. I wished for one soft glance from Kai—one glimpse of the boy who loved me. When his gaze finally met mine for the briefest second, it was all heat and anger.
I pressed my knees together, shocked that I lay naked in front of Kaidan Rowe and he seemed not to care. He stood at the end of the bed, unclasping his belt, which made his cargo shorts droop low on his hips. I had to swallow as he unzipped them.
This isn’t happening. I took a cue from his playbook and appeared slightly uninterested, keeping my eyes on his chest as his shorts dropped to the floor. Don’t look, Anna, I told myself.
Kaidan Rowe was nude, in all his glory, and I had to pretend to be unfazed. I couldn’t be caught gawking as if it was something I’d never seen. Which I hadn’t, and didn’t want to now. Not like this.
He won’t do it, I told myself. He won’t. Not like this. He loves you.
This was exactly the position Kaidan and I swore to never let ourselves get in. Naked. Together. I had no doubt in my mind that his father had sent him and the spirit. The consequence of refusing his father’s will would be death. Was I willing to go all the way in this moment to save him? Even if it meant I couldn’t wield the Sword of Righteousness—the only weapon that would help us get rid of the demons? Kaidan or the world. What kind of choice was that?
Please, please, please, I begged. Get us out of this.
Kaidan came toward me. When the whisperer made that gross, guttural purring sound again, I scrunched my nose. Panic and frustration made me speak out.
“Do you have to be here?” I asked it. “You’re really distracting.”
Shut up, it said to me. As if I want to be here with you boring Neph.
“Then leave,” Kaidan said. “We’re almost finished here. Anyway, I think you’d find room 108 far more interesting.”
This seemed to catch the spirit’s interest, and for the first time since Kai and the whisperer entered, I felt a spike of hope. The demon froze and then bobbed up and down.