The only thing better than kissing Kaidan was kissing him between bites of warm brownie. I now understood the saying about love being like a drug. My body was alight. Though I wasn’t using my extended senses, they were on high alert from the buzzing, floating feeling coursing through my veins. I could see the danger of loving, because nothing else existed for me outside that room. Nothing else mattered. No Dukes or whisperers. No spiritual warfare. And certainly no reason why any soul would disapprove of a relationship that filled two people with such joy.
No. None of that was real. They were fleeting, distant nightmares pushed further away with each press of our lips, each gentle word spoken. We were together. We were alive.
I still couldn’t believe he was allowing this to happen. Letting me love him with my touches. Touching me back. Voracious touches.
Every now and then I’d feel him pull back from me when I’d push forward, keeping me at bay when I got carried away. At one point after I’d licked his earlobe, he closed his eyes and his forehead crinkled in a wince.
I bit my lip. “I’m sorry.”
I mean, really, it would be hard for normal guys, so it had to be especially hard for him.
He opened his eyes to reveal the storm within him. “My every instinct is telling me to have my way with you.” He was dead serious and my cheeks heated. Fire shone in his eyes and I broke eye contact, burying my face into his cotton-covered chest. “But it’s not nearly as difficult as going all this time without you,” he said.
I grasped his T-shirt in my fingers and brought myself nose to nose with him. His eyes ate me up.
“Let’s never do that to ourselves again.” I gripped the fabric tighter, a well of panic surging at the thought of being cut off from him. “I mean it, Kai. No matter what my dad says or how scared we are. We can talk when it’s safe. We’ll be careful. Please don’t push me away—”
“Shh,” he whispered, pulling me to him.
I breathed in the scent of skin at his neck. He ran a hand over my messy hair as the anxiousness settled.
“How often does your father ring you?” he asked.
“Every month or two.” I stayed cuddled close while he continued to caress my hair.
“Right, then. How about this? We know he checks to be certain it’s safe on your end. So each time he rings, you can contact me afterward straightaway.”
“Deal,” I said, and pressed my lips to his neck. He held me tighter.
“It’s nine thirty,” he said with reluctance. “I’ve got to go to practice. Will you join me?”
I smiled up at him. Watching Kaidan play? “Sure.”
Oh, wow.
Oh, great goodness. I’d forgotten what watching Kaidan at the drums did to me. He was only warming up while the other guys tuned their instruments, and I already needed a fan.
I looked around the room at the other people sitting and standing—mostly girls but a few guys, too. One girl gave me a little smile and I smiled back before she returned to gazing at the lead singer, Michael.
The bassist went up to Kai when he finished his set, and I nosily stuck out my hearing.
“You brought a chick?” the guy whispered.
“Yeah.”
The guy grinned. “Man, you haven’t brought a girl in forever.”
“Your point, Raj?” Kaidan ran a hand over the drum’s top.
“Nothin’. She’s pretty hot. You bang her yet?”
Okay, go away, Raj.
Kaidan gave him a steely stare. “Nosy git, aren’t you?”
Raj laughed and pointed at Kai. “Dude. You got it bad if you won’t give any deets. I thought you and Anna were—”
“Nope.” Kaidan cut him off and cleared his throat just as Michael called them all together, and Raj left him alone.
I was biting my lip when Kai looked at me with a worried expression. I sent him a small smile for reassurance. I wasn’t going to get upset, even if hearing her mentioned did turn my stomach.
Kaidan raised the drumsticks above his head to count off the first song, and Michael stopped it after a few seconds because someone was off-key. It had sounded great to me, which showed how little I knew about making music. They started again, and the core of my body tightened when Kai went into musician mode. I could see the very moment when he stopped thinking and lost himself in it. I wondered if he could keep drumming with me on his lap.
He was my drummer. My guy. Mine. I bit my lip to hold back a grin.
The door of the practice room opened during the song and a few people shuffled out of the way. A cute girl with short blond hair came in. She leaned against the wall and crossed her arms, a yellow aura surrounding her petite frame. I was just about to turn my attention back to the band when a stream of red bled into her aura. She was staring hard.
At Kaidan.
I should have looked away, but a gross sense of raging jealousy and morbid curiosity filled me. I knew it was the other Anna. She chewed the tip of her thumb and soon her whole aura was red. I wanted so badly to use my silent power of persuasion to make her leave, but I wouldn’t.
Go. Away. Stop staring at him. Go away, go away, go away.
It felt like evil banshees were clawing my insides. The other Anna was probably a very nice girl, but I wanted to scour her skin and rip from her body every cell that had had any contact with Kaidan.