Smashed (Alexa O'Brien, Huntress #8.5)

Those were the magic words that sent me from calm to boiling over in a split second. I stood there stiff with anger, unmoving. Of course I had wondered. The moment I’d touched him at Shya’s that night, it had crossed my mind that he might see something. But I’d been here before, and living with the knowledge of a future event was a kind of hell I didn’t wish to relive.

“I don’t want to know. Believe me, I’ve got no use for your clairvoyant shit.”

“Not even if it involves Alexa’s sister?” There was no taunt evident in his tone, no snide intent. Somehow that made it worse. All I heard was a threat.

The intent to hurt him was all I needed to have him screaming. He begged me to stop, his words broken and pained.

“Especially if it involves Alexa’s sister.” Maybe there was no keeping Gabriel around. Death might be best for him after all. “Trying to manipulate me with something like that is fucking low, kid. You do want to die, don’t you?”

“Fine. Forget I said anything. I just thought you’d want to know, and you can’t blame me for trying to stay alive. I am not ready to die again!” His shout ended on a wail. He pounded a fist against the ground in frustration, bloodying his knuckles. Yet, he never raised a hand against me.

“For fuck’s sakes,” I muttered, dropping my hold on him. “Get up.”

Slowly he rose, eyeing me warily. “Look, man, I’m sorry. It’s all I have to work with. It’s not like I can overpower you.”

“If I let you live,” I hissed. “I don’t want to hear another word out of your mouth about Juliet O’Brien. Do you understand?”

“Yes,” he said with a tired nod. “Not a word. She doesn’t even exist.”

“Except that she does. And now you’ve gone and put things in my head that shouldn’t be there. Don’t think I’m going to forget that any time soon.” I was furious that he tried such a seedy tactic. I was also somewhat proud. No vampire made by me was a coward. Flighty perhaps. Even a little unstable. But never a coward.

Gabriel shrugged, offering no further apology. He stood there looking like a dog who’d just been kicked. It was convincing enough to make me question the validity of it.

I pinned him with a fierce glare. “Don’t mistake my mercy for weakness. The second you give me a reason to think you’re up to something, you die. I don’t give a good goddamn if it pisses Shya off either. Oh, and another thing. If I find out you’re making vampires for him, I will destroy you and every damn one that you make.”

The atmosphere was tense with the weight of my promise. We stared at one another until Gabriel’s composure faltered.

“He wanted me to do it. That was before everything went down. I haven’t though and I don’t want to.” Something like sorrow crossed his face. It tugged at the pesky sympathetic spark that flickered deep within me. I suppose I should have been grateful to have Alexa’s light, but at times it produced more guilt than I deemed necessary. Though I imagined it was much the same for her with the darkness.

“Are you asking for help?” I questioned, feeling oddly obligated to this vampire I’d made. It was an unwelcome sensation.

“Not yet. I’ll deal with it.” Gabriel’s expression hardened. He thrust out a hand and said, “Thank you. For not killing me. I know Alexa wanted you to do it when you turned me.”

I stared at his hand and laughed. “Thanks, kid, but I’d rather not. Better watch out for Alexa. If she comes across you, she probably won’t be as forgiving.”

“I saw her, before it happened. I touched her, and I saw how bad it would be when she became a vampire.” He shook his head as if it were a shame.

“Alexa isn’t like us, Gabriel. She’s a creature of light forced to live with a hunger rooted in darkness. You and me, we’ve always been ruled by the dark. We can’t even begin to understand what she’s going through.” There was an unspoken warning in my words. I trusted that Gabriel was intelligent enough to catch it.

With a nod, he said, “I should’ve let her help me. Everything happened so fast. I made some stupid fucking choices.”

“As we all have. And you will have more to make yet. Choose wisely.” I wasn’t the best person to hand out advice, yet I felt obligated to say something.

Gabriel made a sour face and shrugged. “I’ll let you get back to your night. Thanks, Arys.”

I watched him go, walking down the street with a lanky shuffle. I hoped like hell that I hadn’t made a mistake by letting him live. His remark about Juliet stuck with me, burrowing inside my mind to take root like a parasite.

Whatever it was, it had to be bad.

* * * *

Using the burner phone from the glove box of my car, I placed a call to Juliet. She answered with a short, clipped greeting that went from professional to personal once I announced myself.

“I thought you were going to do something about Alexa,” she snapped. “An agent has gone missing, and Briggs is sure that she’s behind it. He’s insisting we issue a capture order for her.”

“A missing agent?” I pondered this, curious.