CHAPTER EIGHT
After I had thrown my ratty tank in the trashcan, it was time for me to pretty-up. I threw on slim-cut olive cargo pants and a billowy black kimono shirt (loose sleeves were my friend at the moment) and piled my wet hair back into a low braid, before attacking my fragile face with makeup. There was nothing I could do about the orange smear of iodine on my cheekbone but at least I could do my eyes up. Maybe I over did it with the eyeliner but I needed something to distract from my wounds.
When I felt more or less composed, I made my way downstairs. I heard voices coming from the living room and saw, well, pretty much everyone sitting there.
Will and Bird were sitting on the couch, while Maximus sat back in the loveseat beside Dex, who was scribbling into a spiral notebook. His camera sat on the table. Across from that was Sarah in her rocking chair, going through the knitting motions.
Everyone stopped talking as soon as they saw me. I could not have felt more awkward.
I waved. “I didn’t know we had a party going on.”
“Bird was just telling us about what happened,” Will explained. “Then Dex filled us in on the rest.”
I shot Dex a killer look. I thought everything I just told him was confidential!
“They all needed to know exactly what happened,” he said, ignoring my death glare and turning his attention back to the books.
Maximus nodded. “It’s the only way we’ll actually figure out how to deal with all of this.”
Sarah laughed. “All of this? Any of you think that perhaps Miss Snoops here just doesn’t get along with animals? I mean she barely gets by with-”
“Sarah,” Will warned, wagging his finger despite the fact she couldn’t see the gesture.
She clucked and continued knitting. “I’m just saying, this is a lot of fuss for some city girl who went for a walk in the woods. It’s a lot easier to blame something else.”
I crossed my arms impatiently (and carefully).
“OK, well since you were all talking about me while I was gone, how about you fill me in on any conclusions you may have had?”
Dex and Maximus and Bird all exchanged a three-way glance. I waited for them to say something but no one uttered a word. At last, Will spoke up.
“The Navajo believe that people can be cursed by someone,” Will said with embarrassment. “They believe that if a curse is placed on the person, that the person will continue to suffer from the curse until they die. Unless the curse is found and burned.”
I must have looked confused because Bird elaborated, “The curse is usually a bundle of twigs, maybe animal skin, a drawing depicting the curse and a personal item of the person, like hair or jewelry. If you can find the bundle, usually by using a medicine man, you can burn it and destroy the curse forever.”
“But that’s bull,” Will said, wriggling uncomfortably in his seat and avoiding Bird’s eyes. “I don’t believe any of that for a second and you know it Bird.”
“But you believe in ghosts,” Maximus drawled nonchalantly.
“That’s different,” said Will. But that’s all he said.
“That aside then,” I said, “could all of this be the work of a curse, Bird? If you believed it, could you get a medicine man here to find the bundle or whatever and lift the curse?”
Everyone’s eyes turned to Bird. He looked down and adjusted the hat on his head. “Technically, yes.”
“But…,” Dex added.
“But nothing,” Bird said, slapping his hands against his knees. “We could do it, if this really was a curse. But that’s a big if.”
“But couldn’t a medicine man tell you if it was or wasn’t? Maybe we just need confirmation and then we can cross it off the list,” I offered.
“Shan’s a medicine man,” Sarah piped up.
That simple remark managed to change the whole dynamic of the room.
Judging from their faces, Maximus and Dex were just as surprised to hear that as I was. Bird was shaking his head ever so slightly as if he was mad at Sarah for bringing it up, Will was rolling his eyes and Sarah looked downright smug.
“You’re kidding me,” I finally said.
“Does it look like I’m kidding?” Sarah said, then went back to her knitting, smiling to herself.
“It’s true, Shan was a medicine man,” Bird spoke slowly. “Was, though. He’s not anymore. It’s complicated.”
“Damn right, it’s complicated,” Will said. “And you aren’t involving him in any of this. Let him do his job, his proper job. Which you should be doing too, Bird.”
Sarah suddenly sprung out of her chair and flung her knitting stuff to the side, the needle ricocheting off the wood floor with a clatter. Her agility surprised me.
“I say we go see him right now and see what he says!” she exclaimed.
“Sarah, don’t you dare,” Will said as he got up and made a grab for his wife but she was already beyond his reach and shuffling with her cane towards the door.
She felt for her shoes and slipped them on effortlessly. “Well come on you ghost hunters, don’t you want to talk to a real medicine man and see if he can put an end to all of this?”
I did but there was something terribly off-putting about the way she was so gung-ho. I glanced at Dex who was already staring at me. His expression agreed. Something didn’t gel here.
But to Maximus it did and he was already joining Sarah by the door. “Bring the camera just in case,” he said and motioned to Dex, as if he was suddenly in charge of the whole operation.
“This is a bad idea,” Bird said getting out of the couch, his jaw set firmly. Will agreed.
I gave them a shrug to show that it wasn’t my idea, but I wasn’t missing this either. Dex snatched up his camera (with some annoyance, I’m sure, at being told what to do) and we ran after Maximus and Sarah who were already out the door and heading to the barn.
“She can sure move fast for a blind lady,” I said under my breath to Dex as we went after them. I couldn’t run thanks to my ankle so it was a gimpy speedwalk of sorts.
“Mmmmm,” he muttered, flipping on the camera switches.
“What are you thinking?” I asked. He had something going on in that head of his.
“I’d say the same thing you are,” he said and stopped. “Hold on.”
He licked his thumb and then smudged it along my cheek, wiping off the iodine.
“Which is what?”
“Something’s not right. But we’ll figure it out. You ready?”
“Ready for what?” >
“Ready for anything. Come on, we can’t lose them,” he broke into a trot heading to the barn where Sarah and Maximus just disappeared into. I did my best to keep pace.
As we entered the darkness of the barn, my eyes had a hell of a time adjusting to the light. I walked blindly for a few moments, feeling for Dex, when I heard a Spanish-accented snarl.
“You too?” Miguel’s voice came from the shadows.
We stopped. Miguel came out from a tack room, wiping his hands on a dirty cloth.
“Sarah and–” Dex started.
“They went to see Shan,” Miguel interrupted, pointing out the other end of the barn where the hall opened into a tunnel of light. “I don’t know why. He’s sick.”
He nearly spat out that last word, like it was our fault.
“He’s sick?” Dex repeated.
“His chest hurts. Nothing bad but he’s in bed.”
“Thanks,” Dex said and began for the end of the barn.
“I think it’s stupid. Leave the man alone,” Miguel said. I gave him a small smile as I passed him. His dark eyes were glaring at me with all their might as per usual, but I felt an aura of fear radiating off of him. Maybe it was my imagination. It was obviously having its way with me today.
I couldn’t dwell on it. I limped after Dex, our footsteps echoing down the cloudy hall until we entered the sunlight again and made our way for Shan and Miguel’s house, just behind a line of junipers.
It was a simple, small bungalow made with faded grey wood. Maximus was standing alone outside the front door. It was closed.
“Thanks for waiting,” Dex said sarcastically. “Where’s Sarah?”
Maximus ignored him with a twitch of his head and pointed at the door. “She went in there. Miguel said Shan was feeling ill and she freaked right out.”
“Chest pains?” I asked.
“I reckon so. Hope it’s not a heart attack. I don’t know how well equipped the hospital is here.”
“Yeah,” I said absently. That off-feeling was nagging at me again. I wondered if Maximus sensed it too.
“You can’t go in there with her?” I asked him.
He shook his head and stepped away from the door. He came over to us in a hush, putting one big arm over each of our shoulders, and led us away from the house.
“Are any of you getting a bad feeling about this?” he whispered, head between us.
Dex and I agreed. I hadn’t been in a huddle since my childhood softball games.
“I don’t know what though,” I added.
“Yeah, me neither,” Maximus sighed and straightened up.
The sound of the door opening caused us all to turn around. If Sarah could have seen us we’d have probably looked a might suspicious in our little head to head. But she couldn’t.
She closed the door firmly behind her and said, “Hello?”
“We’re here,” Dex answered, walking over to her. “Is Shan OK? Miguel told us what happened.”
She poked her cane out in front of her, almost nailing Dex in the knee, and walked toward the trees. “He’s fine, just has a sore chest,” she said dismissively.
“Sore chest?” I repeated.
She stopped but didn’t turn around. “Yes. A sore chest. Are you deaf? He probably pulled something. He does most of the work around here, don’t let Miguel or Bird tell you otherwise.”
Maximus walked over to her and put his hand on her shoulder. “Want some help getting through the trees?”
She brushed off his hand. “Do I look like an invalid to you, white boy?”
I almost laughed at his taken aback expression. He ran his hand through his red hair and gave us a shrug. She began to walk again, quicker, as if to prove she wasn’t an invalid. Not that we doubted that anyway.
I limped after her, the boys following.
“But if he’s a medicine man, can’t he heal himself?” I asked innocently.
Sarah laughed. “You really know nothing about the Navajo, do you? A healer cannot heal himself. He must find another medicine man to do that.”
She sounded quite grave but her tone became more flippant when she added, “Anyway, it’s nothing that some Aspirin won’t fix. Maybe tomorrow you can have a talk with him about this medicine man stuff. I’m sure he would love to enlighten you all.”
We followed her to the house in silence but came to a halt outside the door. After she went inside, I turned to the guys and told them I was starving.
And I did not want to eat lunch in the house. I wanted to get out of there for a bit.
Maximus nodded and headed up the stairs. “I’ll just tell them we are getting lunch in town before they start making us stuff.”
I looked at Dex.
“Need anything from inside. Books, perhaps?”
He shook his head No and walked over to the Jeep. “There’s a few books in here I got from the library while you were out on your little, uh, hike. I think we’re going to want to read them. As soon as possible.”
We ended up driving a little ways out of town, to one of the gas stations on the outskirts that doubled as a greasy spoon diner.
We piled into a small booth, Maximus squished up against me, and quickly ordered our food from the indifferent waitress before getting down to business. She didn’t even bat an eye at my bandaged hands.
After she brought us our much-needed meals, Dex had the books out and pushed one of them towards us.
“I think this is what we are dealing with here,” he said, eyeing the book. He glanced at me quickly and then looked away, giving the impression that though he was serious, he was still a bit apprehensive of what I might think.
I looked at the title. “Navajo myths and folklore?”
“All myths come from somewhere,” Dex said.
I flipped open the book to the index. “Any particular chapter?”
Maximus laid his well-groomed fingertip beneath Chapter Two: Skinwalkers and poked it hard for emphasis.
I looked at Dex for assurance. He nodded. I flipped to the chapter and skimmed through it.
I had heard of skinwalkers before, or shapeshifters, as they are called in other cultures. But I mean, that really was a myth. Like the werewolf. And trolls. And leprechauns.
It was all so strange and fantastic that I stopped after a few pages and gave Dex the most disbelieving look I could muster.
“Are you kidding me? You think we are dealing with skinwalkers?”
“Shhhh!” Maximus shushed me, glancing around the near empty diner. The few truck drivers and the waitress didn’t seem to notice. “We shouldn’t be talking too loudly about this.”
“Why?” I snorted.
Dex leaned across the table, his voice low, “Because the people here, they really do believe in this. And if they hear a bunch of white people talking about it, that could cause some problems.”
I got that but still…
“I know they believe it but I mean…it’s impossible.”
“What I do is impossible,” Maximus said through a neat mouthful of his BLT.
“What we’ve seen is impossible,” Dex added. “What’s the difference?”
The difference was that ghosts could be explained. To me, anyway, it almost made scientific sense. After you died, it was inherently possible that you could still exist in some form…whether it was not moving on, getting stuck in some limbo alternate universe, leftover electric energy, or some other kind of “force”, the concept of having something survive after you die didn’t really seem like that much of a stretch when you thought about it. But the fact that a person could physically become an animal, at will, and then revert back to human form was just ridiculous.
“I hate to get all Scully on your Mulder asses but I just don’t think this is what’s happening,” I said. Maximus laughed at that, appreciating the X-Files reference.
“But you’d believe a curse?” Dex questioned.
“I don’t know,” I admitted and tucked into my overtly salty French onion soup. “I don’t know what I believe anymore. I mean, if it’s so obvious to you guys that this a skinwalker situation, then why hasn’t anyone else, any of the actual Navajo people, said anything about it?”
“Because they don’t discuss it with non-believers if they don’t have to,” Dex explained. “I think Bird knows exactly what is going on, he’s just waiting for the time to tell us. Or maybe waiting for the right person to tell us.”
“And he knows Will and Sarah wouldn’t have any of it if that’s what it came down to,” said Maximus. “Could you imagine it? After all their forsaking of their beliefs and heritage, it turns out to be the very thing that is causing all their problems.”
Actually, what he said made perfect sense. It was a little too ironic. I told them that.
“But maybe it’s someone tormenting them for turning their backs on the Navajo. Maybe someone wants to teach them a lesson.”
“If it’s a skinwalker, it’s someone,” Dex lowered his voice even more, as if that someone could be in the diner with us. “If it’s a curse, it’s also someone. I don’t think we are dealing with ghosts here. Not at all.”
“I agree with you, brother,” said Maximus, pushing his empty plate away.
Dex narrowed his eyes at him. “Don’t call me brother.”
Maximus met his eyes and a testosterone staring contest ensued.
“Oh come on, knock it off you two,” I sighed. “Put whatever weirdass bullshit you have aside, at least for this weekend, all right?”
“Easy there, kiddo” Dex said, reaching across the table and patting my hand. “We’re just playing.”
Maximus smiled at me with an Elvis-like lip curl. “If we aren’t dealing with ghosts per se, it could be why I can’t sense anything. There’s no death here.”
“Not yet,” I said without thinking, as the biggest sense of déjà vu slammed into me like hailstorm. The room seemed to vibrate and shift, the drone of a fly on the dirty window became louder and louder. Dex squeezed my hand.
“Perry,” he whispered.
I tried to focus on my soup, on the drowning bits of sodden bread in the briny broth. The buzz of the fly became so loud, it was as if it were burrowing in my ear, an audio root canal. Dex squeezed my hand harder and it stopped. I looked at him, his eyes were full of knowing, knowing more than I did. The room stopped spinning but the feeling of déjà vu still lingered.
“Sorry,” I gasped, not sure of what just happened. Was that a panic attack? Or just a dizzy spell?
“Do you realize what you just said?” he asked quietly.
He kept his hand on mine and looked at Maximus. “And what you just said?”
I looked at Maximus. His strong face was as puzzled as mine.
“Perry had a dream a few days ago,” Dex started and proceeded to tell Maximus all of it. My mind caught up quickly. No wonder I had déjà vu, Maximus and I just spoke to each other the dialogue in the dream. “There is no death here,” I said slowly to myself. “Not yet.”
If everything in my dream was slowly coming true…what was next, for coyotes to start walking on two legs and then…? I shuddered. Perhaps the skinwalker conclusion wasn’t too far off.
I pushed my bowl of soup away, my appetite gone. I suddenly missed my old job. Working in the safe, sterile ad agency didn’t seem so bad anymore.
After we finished up our food, we made our way back to the ranch. I sat in the back of the Jeep and listened absently to Dex and Maximus talk about what their chums from the old college days were doing now. My attention flitted in and out as I flipped through the book to feed my overstuffed mind. If skinwalkers were a possibility, I needed to know exactly what we were dealing with.
According to the book, skinwalkers were “evil” Navajo witches who could shapeshift into any animal form, usually something local like a coyote, a fox, a bird or a bear. Sometimes they tormented their victims by throwing stones or banging on the walls, other times they would attack you in your car or they’d do some other sort of malicious prank. It didn’t say too much about disfigured livestock, nor did it mention any cases of anyone actually being physically hurt by the skinwalkers, which was a relief of sorts. Not that I had even begun to accept it, but it was good to know. If my dreams were some sort of foreshadowing of events to come, I definitely did not want the part where the coyote people ripped me from limb to limb to come true.
“How are you doing?” Maximus asked, turning around in the passenger seat, his warm voice slinking off the walls.
I shut the book and put on a brave face. “I’m OK.”
He had such a sexy energy at times that I couldn’t help but want to put up a front around him. Me, scared of skinwalkers? Nonsense.
He pursed his lips for a second and then grinned in his aw shucks way. “You’re braver than I am.”
I leaned in closer and made sure to speak a bit breathier, “I have a hard time believing you’d buy into this skinwalker business, let alone be scared of it. You look like you could take on a grizzly bear with your own hands.”
Yes, that’s right. I was flirting with him. I couldn’t help it. I think my nerves needed a pleasant diversion. So, I flashed him a smile that made the cut on my cheek sting. I could see Dex’s eyes float up to the rear view mirror and glance at me curiously. I remembered what he said about Maximus wanting to get in my pants. I wanted to test that theory and part of me wanted to do it to see if Dex would care. Why he would, I don’t know, but I was going to do it anyway. >
Maximus actually blushed. Or at least the tops of his forehead were starting to match his hair.
“I am not about to wrestle no bears, but I did used to catch baby gators for my cousin back in Louisiana,” he said. “They were easy once you got their mouths clamped shut.”
“Just like Perry,” Dex chimed in cheerfully.
“Shut up.” I glared at him. He gave me a skeezy look in the mirror and laughed.
I shook my head and looked back at Maximus who was trying not to laugh himself. I rolled my eyes. “Anyway…”
“Anyway,” Maximus repeated, still grinning at me, “just because I’m 6’4” doesn’t mean I can’t get scared every once in a while.”
I cocked my head. “Do you ever get scared on the job. You know, doing a reading?”
He nodded, his green eyes sobering. “Oh, of course. How can you not? The most terrifying moment is the one right before I do it. I don’t know how these people died. I mean, I know to some extent but to feel what people feel when they go…it is God awful. It hits you like brick. Every time. I can’t even prepare for it. I reckon I never will. You think you know death, you think you have some idea of what happens, of how you’ll feel but you don’t know. And I only feel, probably, fifty per cent of what they went through. The terror. The… questions they had. It’s always, why? Why now? Why me? It is so powerful, it leaves a f*cking imprint that some hillbilly like me can pick up on. And each time I do it…”
He trailed off, his eyes leaving mine and stared out the back window, watching the dusty road disappear behind us. His blush was gone and he had turned a wicked shade of alabaster. This big, burly man with his sexy snarl looked like a freckled little boy, sleeping with the nightlight on.
Instinctively, I reached over and brushed his hair back lightly. He had nice, thick hair.
He gave me a quick smile. “Well, let’s just say I wouldn’t wish death upon my greatest enemy.”
“Jesus. Can we shut up with the death talk, please?” Dex grumbled, eyeing us in the mirror, anger sparking.
Maximus looked sheepish. “Sorry man, I forgot.”
Dex shot him a sharp look but Maximus was turning around in his seat and didn’t notice. I did though. What did that mean…“I forgot?” Forgot what? I know Dex’s family was dead…I guess that had to be it. But it felt like something much deeper and rawer than that.
And being me, I couldn’t let it rest. I wanted to know and if I brought it up later, I wouldn’t have Maximus there for support and whatnot.
“Well you picked an ironic profession if you didn’t want to talk about death,” I challenged. I meant to say that a bit nicer.
Maximus turned his head to look at Dex. Dex didn’t move or say anything but his grip on the steering wheel tightened.
“Skinwalkers aren’t technically dead though,” Maximus said.
“I’m not talking about skinwalkers, which by the way, I am not totally sold on yet. I just mean with Dex. You, Dex, what’s with the ‘shut up with the death talk’ all of a sudden?”
Dex slowly moved his eyes up to the mirror to meet mine. I hadn’t seen him glare that good for a long time. He was the king of glares. Sometimes they were sexy (probably by accident) but they were always effective. When his black, arched brow lowered and connected with those dark eyes and his lips set in a snake-like twist, he just radiated intensity. The depths always surprised me. It was like looking into a cave and thinking you could see the back of it, but it just ended up being a trick of the eye. There was always more, another twist, another turn.
This was the best exampled I had seen yet; I thought the glass in the mirror might shatter.
It made me sit back in my seat just a bit, but I wasn’t going to back off.
“What?” I shrugged, playing the ignorant card. I tapped Maximus on the shoulder. “Tell me more about what people feel when they die.”
“Uh,” he glanced warily at Dex. Dex looked right back at him.
“Don’t let me stop you,” he sneered. “If she wants to know, she wants to know.”
Maximus looked back at me, his voice a bit shaky, “Okay then. Well, it depends.”
“What was the scariest reading you’ve done?”
“I reckon it would have to be this woman who was murdered. By her own daughter.”
I grimaced. “Ugh.”
Maximus quickly glanced at Dex and continued, “Yeah. She was sick. No one could figure out what was wrong with her. Her daughter was taking care of her and I guess it got to be too much. She smothered her with a pillow. You can’t… imagine what that woman felt as her own child killed her. To raise someone and love someone that much and then for them to turn around and take your life, like it all meant nothing, was-”
SCREEE!
Dex suddenly slammed on the brakes and the Jeep was careening off to the side of the road. We stopped on the shoulder in a mist of red dust.
“What is it?” I cried, thinking we had almost hit something.
Dex got out of the car and slammed the door. I looked at Maximus, mouth agape. He looked uneasy.
“You stay here, please,” he said. “I’ll be right back.”
“No!” I protested but it was too late. He was out of the car.
“This is how people get killed in horror films,” I pouted to myself, wishing the dust would clear so I could get a proper look outside.
I had no idea why we stopped. It was like Dex just had enough. I was starting to feel bad for provoking him but maybe it was something else. Unlikely, but possible.
Seconds later Maximus got back inside, coughing from the air outside.
“Well, what happened?” I asked anxiously.
He let out a low groan. “Oh. You know Dex.”
I leaned forward on his seat and tried to see out the front. The red cloud was clearing and I could see someone, I presumed Dex, walking away from the car.
“Where is he going?”
“Just give him a few minutes,” Maximus replied simply. I looked at him closer, at the freckles on his nose, the sienna hairs of his five o’ clock shadow. He moved his head to face mine and gave me a little smile.
“You guys sure are f*cked up.”
“Me?” I said.
His smile grew wider. He stuck the tip of his tongue out between his teeth.
“You’re almost worse than he is,” he said rather suggestively. “It’s OK, I’m all for women with a little more adventure to them.”
I couldn’t tell if he was kidding so I ignored it.
“Yesterday, you told me I couldn’t trust Dex,” I said.
“I told you that you shouldn’t. Not that you couldn’t.”
“Why did you say that?”
“Dex isn’t well…”
“Well, I know that Sherlock.”
He squinted those emerald peepers at me. “Watson, more like it. You know he’s a few cards short of the deck.”
“Yeah. I mean, who can’t see that. Plus he actually told me. He’s bipolar or something and, you know, right now he’s not even on any meds so he’s all out of sorts.” I felt strangely defensive about Dex’s mental health.
“Do you reckon he’s bipolar?”
I thought about it. “Maybe. I mean, I guess. Why would he lie?”
He adjusted in his seat to get more comfortable and rested his chin on the back of it.
“Dex is one of the greatest liars you’ll ever come across. The man turns it into an art.”
That wasn’t good to hear. I felt a bit icky, as if he was about to spring something on me that would change my view of Dex forever. I didn’t want to change my view about him. I liked him. A lot.
Maximus was watching me closely. “You’re worried about him.”
“Well, uh,” I stammered. “Sure.”
“I wouldn’t. He’s been this way a long time and he’s still around and kicking. Doing better now more than ever. I mean, have you seen his girlfriend?”
My face fell for a split second but I pushed it into blasé territory before he could notice. “Yeah, I know who she is.”
“When we were together at NYU, he was always all over the place. Like a wind-up toy. Sometimes he would be on and when he was on, he was really on. Ideas coming from all over the place, intelligent debates that would last into the wee hours of the morning, and just creating the most incredible shit out of nothing…especially, music. He would write the craziest songs yet they always worked. We didn’t end up using those songs, after all we were a cover band, you know, Henry Mancini and all that, but he still wrote them. And his voice...and he would write too, like thoughts, fiction…just stay up all night drinking and writing pages of…anything. He would never share that with anyone, but I caught a few glances here and there. That boy had a wicked imagination.
“And then when he was off, he was off. Just shut off from the world. It was hard to tolerate the two sides of him, especially when he would be on doing rehearsals, and then would shut off on stage. You can imagine that doesn’t go over very well. But I mean, he was it. He was our singer. He was the guy we wanted to be even though none of us would admit it. And sometimes, he was a very good friend, when he wasn’t being tortured by some personal demon of some sort. He never let us in close but when he took the effort to put himself aside for a change, he was fiercely loyal.”
“I can see that,” I said, nodding.
“And then he fell in love. With a real sweet girl. Abby. She was kind of a fangirl at first. Frankly I think she was after me but I had a girlfriend at the time. She was far too nice for Dex but he went for her. I guess sensed her vulnerability or whatever. She could put up with a lot and she really cared. But the more involved they got, the more Dex, like…fell. My Lord, I have never seen a boy that smitten over someone so meek and mousy but that’s what happened. That’s love, you can’t explain it. He was apeshit in love. And soon, he became more possessive. He was jealous. And at first he had no reason to be. But the more, uh, crazed he became, the more Abby pulled away. I know she started cheating on him. My girlfriend became friends with her and she told me. I ended up telling Dex. I shouldn’t have but, you know, honestly I thought the moment those two broke up, the more Dex could concentrate on his music. It was very Yoko Ono and John Lennon.”
“Except John Lennon doesn’t die in this case,” I said, fascinated by what I was hearing.
His face tightened. I felt the energy in the car drop.
“No. But she did.”
I was stunned but managed to ask, “How?”
Please don’t let Dex have killed her, I thought absently.
“Happens every weekend,” Maximus said sadly. “Driving drunk. Dex had gone over there as soon as I told him and he ended up finding Abby and some guy in bed together.”
I gasped, personally knowing all too well what Dex had gone through.
Maximus continued, “I think he may have punched the guy or threw him out. I’m glad nothing worse happened to him because when Dex loses it, he really goes all out. He and Abby had a yelling match. The people at the dorm said they heard glass breaking, lamps were thrown, though I don’t know who did what. It was an epic fight, I know that much. Dex has a short temper anyway. Abby was so distraught that she had to call my girlfriend to come get her. Of course, I was with her so I came too. I could put Dex in his place if I needed to. He’s a scrappy fighter but I’ve got a clear head. And maybe I could talk him down.
“We came and I had to kick down the door. Felt very badass. Dex was sitting on the couch with his head between his hands. Eyes all wide and wild but strangely…empty. He said Abby had locked herself in the bathroom with a bottle of gin. My girlfriend tried to coax her out of the bathroom but none doing. Eventually I had to kick that door down too. Just totally destroyed that apartment. The bathroom was empty, as was the bottle of gin in the sink. And it was a big bottle. The room was on the first floor and the window was open. She went out that way, then I guess went to her car and drove somewhere. We don’t know where, she never called anyone from her phone. I guess she was too drunk. Drove straight into a tree, about five minutes away from the dorm.”
I didn’t know what to say. My fingers were at my mouth.
He noticed and gave me an empathetic shrug. “There’s been too much death in his life. Dex couldn’t handle it. And then he really lost it. Basically lost his mind from the shock and blame.”
“But it wasn’t his fault,” I said. My heart ached.
“No, it wasn’t. And Abby was known to drink a lot and drive from time to time, long before she met Dex. But given his…past, he automatically blamed himself. He started behaving irrationally. He had to drop out of school, out of the band, then basically out of life. He… shoot, I don’t even think I should be telling you this much. Sorry Perry, that’s all I’ll say. It wasn’t even my place.”
He looked regretful and let out a long sigh.
“And you’re saying I’m just as bad as he is?” I reminded him.
“I guess you aren’t. So far.”
I hit Maximus lightly on the shoulder. “Very funny.”
“You’re a good girl, Perry,” he admitted. “I just think you two can be a bit too alike. Two wrongs don’t make a right. And I mean that in the nicest sense.”
I sat back in my seat, feeling like crap. All this new information about Dex was a bit overwhelming. I couldn’t help but feel so bad for him. How horrible would that be? Accident or not, I know I couldn’t deal with it very well. I had a hard enough time dealing with my own past that was nowhere near that bad. No wonder he didn’t want us talking about death. >
“Excuse me,” I told Maximus. “I’m going to go get him.”
“If you know what you are doing,” he replied. “Just don’t forget about me here. I think I’ve got ten minutes before the heat eats me alive.”
It was disgustingly hot in the car. I hadn’t even noticed this whole time. Even though sitting in there and talking to Maximus was intriguing and I adored listening to his southern drawl, I couldn’t leave Dex out there, now knowing what had happened to him. I had this urge to run up to him and give him the biggest hug, even though Dex was not a huggy type.
I stepped out into the dust and closed the door so no more would come in. It had died down but was still fanned by passing cars.
Dex’s hunched figure stood by the side of the road. It wasn’t like he was hitchhiking, he was just standing there, looking bleak.
I ran down the shoulder while being careful with my ankle and stopped beside him. He kept his eyes forward. I followed his blank gaze across the road. On a fencepost, among pointy scrub and cacti, was an owl. It was staring back at us, big eyes sticking out of its snowy head like black marbles, unmoving.
We watched the owl in silence for a while, before it flew off with huge pumps of its wings that disturbed the brush around it. I kept my eye on it until it was just a dot on the horizon and then disappeared from our sight.
I looked up at Dex. His face was smooth, maybe a bit of worry in the forehead. He was smoking a hand-rolled cigarette that smelled heavenly. I had smelled it on him earlier in the bathroom.
“May I?” I asked, putting my hand out for it.
He finally turned to look at me. “What?”
“Can I have a puff? It smells good.”
He stared at me thoughtfully and had another long drag himself.
Eventually, through a large puff of white smoke, he said, “No.”
I looked back to where the owl had been.
“How long had that owl been there?”
“Since I walked over here.”
“Is that why you pulled over?” I tested.
He flicked the cigarette out onto the road, right on time for a passing truck to drive over it. He looked into my eyes, his gaze steady and poignant.
“No,” he said flatly.
“I’m sorry.”
“For what?”
“For being inconsiderate.”
“Inconsiderate of what?” he replied lazily.
Oh jeez, he was going to make me spell it out for him, wasn’t he? I didn’t want to get Maximus in trouble. I had a feeling he probably wasn’t supposed to enlighten me with Dex’s troubled past.
“I am just…sorry. OK?” I held out my hand. “Friends?”
He looked at my hand and then back at me, seeming to think about it. After five seconds, I felt a bit foolish to have my bandaged hand sticking out like that, unshaken.
“Yeah,” he said slowly. “We’re friends.”
He took my hand in his and turned it over. “How does it feel?”
“It’s sore but I’ll live. My nurse did a good job.”
He nibbled on his lip, a gesture I was starting to find adorable.
“I guess we are even.”
“How so?”
“Nevermind.”
I grabbed him at the elbow for emphasis.
“No, please, don’t nevermind me,” I pleaded. “Remember that talking thing we talked about yesterday.”
“Vaguely,” was his reply.
I sighed. He was impossible.
“Just…,” I started. Then threw my hands up in the air. It was too hot and dusty here to be arguing and it was a fairly one-sided argument. I didn’t know why we were suddenly even and maybe it was better that way.
I started walking to the car.
“Perry,” he said. There was a melancholy infliction in his voice that made me stop and turn around.
“I was hoping you’d come out and get me.”
I put my hands on my hips and cocked my head, pondering that revelation.
“Well,” I said, feeling truthful. “I’m always going to come and get you.”
We stood there on the side of the road, just looking at each other, with ten feet between us. Neither of us said anything, maybe we didn’t need to.
I waved him over to me. He shuffled forward. I grabbed his hand, dry and rough, and gave it a squeeze. A literal spark, a current, rushed from his hand to mine. In seconds it caused internal shivers around my neck. I don’t know if he felt it. He eyed my hand anxiously, at first anyway. Then squeezed back. More sparks.
Too bad I couldn’t enjoy them for long, before random images of Jennifer flashed through my head and made me realize I may not be helping the situation at all. So I let go of him slowly, and together we walked back to the car, and to Maximus, who was no doubt sweating like a poor dog that’s been forsaken by its owners.