His big arms wrap around me as he kisses the top of my head. “Kills me that I can’t stop this. Fuck, believe me I tried. The judge is an asshole who doesn’t see the big deal in dragging an abuse victim into the courtroom and having her face a monster.”
Suddenly, calm descends on me as I turn to comfort him. In a way, this has been harder for Lucian to handle than me. He feels frustrated, helpless, and angry. I wonder again if it’s even wise for him to accompany me today. Will he be able to stop himself from beating my stepfather to a pulp? He has told me that his lawyer advised him to keep it under control or he’d be removed from the courtroom. I know he’ll try for my sake.
Since he walked back into my life after disappearing for days, things have been different between us…better. I have spent every night at his apartment. He continues to push my boundaries both in and out of bed, and I love it. To my knowledge, he hasn’t had any more nightmares. He hasn’t said anything, but I have seen him taking medication before bed the last few nights. He is sleeping deeper and looks groggy in the mornings. I know he is afraid of hurting me again, but I wish the medication wasn’t necessary. Maybe, after this is all over, we should both check into therapy. If Lucian won’t talk to me, possibly he will open up to someone else. I just hope that being involved with someone dealing with their own demons isn’t pushing him to a place he can’t handle.
I reach up to cup his cheek in my palm, rubbing the smooth skin there. He has become such a big part of my life that I can’t imagine what I’ll do when he’s gone. I can’t think about that now, though; I have to survive today before I can dwell on tomorrow. “I’m fine, Luc. He can’t hurt me anymore. I’m glad you’re going to be there; you make everything better.”
He turns his head, kissing my palm. “I’ve got you, baby. We’ll get this behind us today, then I’ll bring you home and make love to you all night. Fucking bury that shit behind us where it belongs.”
“Oh, Luc.” A vice squeezes my heart at his words. I have no defense against him when he gives me sweet. He’s possessive, dominant, and protective toward me, but sometimes so gentle and sweet it brings me to tears. In moments like this, I feel he would battle the world to take care of me. It makes the girl who no one ever wanted feel like the woman who has it all. Words of love rise to my lips, threatening to choke me, but I hold them back. It’s too soon, and I know instinctively he’s not ready to hear them. I’m so afraid they’ll slip out in a vulnerable moment, and it will be the catalyst that causes him to leave me.
We stand there for a moment longer, each lost in our own thoughts, before he checks his watch and pulls back. I smooth down the material of the simple linen-shift dress I’ve borrowed from Rose and square my shoulders. Luc takes my hand and pulls me through the apartment and out to the curb where Sam is waiting in the Mercedes. He straightens from where he is leaning against the car to open the backdoor for us. “Good morning, Lia,” he says giving my arm a gentle squeeze of encouragement as I pass him. I hear Lucian exchanging a few words with him before he enters behind me.
Lucian puts his arm around me and pulls me into his side as the car moves through traffic. Neither of us speaks on our short ride to the courthouse, and all too soon, Sam is turning off the engine and opening the door for our exit. “I’ll be right here waiting when you are finished,” he says. I know this is his way of trying to reassure me that everything will be fine. Impulsively, I turn back, giving him a hug. I can tell he is surprised, but his arms encircle me briefly as he returns the embrace. Lucian takes my hand once again, and we walk up the stairs to the double set of doors where his lawyer Max is waiting.
Lucian’s lawyer appears to be in his thirties. His hair is dark, almost black, and neatly styled. Like Lucian, Max is tall and powerfully built. He extends a hand to me. “Miss Adams, I’m Max Decker. Sorry to meet under less-than-desirable circumstances.” I shake his hand, liking his straightforward manner. He turns to greet Lucian before turning back to me. “Miss Adams…”
Before he can continue, I hold up a hand, saying, “Please, call me Lia. I have a feeling I’m going to be Miss Adams far too much today as it is.”
With a brief incline of his head to acknowledge my request, he continues, “Lia, I realize this will be difficult for you. If it’s any consolation, though, I believe this will be fairly quick and straightforward. There is no line of witnesses to go through nor any other testimony besides that of you and your mother, and possibly Mr. Dawson on the rebuttal. There is no jury involved, so the judge will handle the ruling. You will be called to testify first. The purpose is to establish a past pattern of violence and instability. Your mother will testify next and the court will likely break after that. Mr. Dawson will testify after the break, if he so chooses and that should be it.