Oh hell. Why not? “So far, so good. But no, I didn’t get laid. We’re just making plans for my next day off. So I can finally spend some time with—” I caught myself before I used “him” and quickly said, “So we can spend some time together.”
“I’m sure.” Her eyes flicked up again, and she smiled. “I have to say, she really brings out an adorable side of you, you know that, right?”
I glanced at our coworkers, making sure they weren’t listening in. They were preoccupied with a lively conversation about something, so I turned back to her. “What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about that silly little smile you keep getting when I assume you’re thinking about her or sending her millions of texts. And when I mention her, apparently.”
“What are you—” Whoa. She was right, wasn’t she? I was grinning like an idiot and hadn’t even realized it. I cleared my throat and put on a poker face. “Hey, I haven’t been with anyone in a while. It’s…a nice switch.”
“A nice switch?” She laughed, focusing on guiding the bracket into place. “I know you, Jon. A ‘nice switch’ was when you were getting laid a few months ago and looked like a giddy idiot.” She gestured at me with the pliers. “This? I think you like doing more than just rolling in the sheets with her.” Her eyes darted toward our coworkers as if she worried she’d spoken too loudly. Quieter now, she added, “Is it serious?”
Her expression dared me to challenge her. And in any other situation, I might have, but I was having a hell of a time coming up with any arguments.
So, I just shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe? Eventually? It’s still a new thing.”
“Well, it’s a cute thing, and it keeps you from being grumpy. So, I approve.”
I laughed, rolling my eyes. “Gee, thanks, T.”
“Any time.” She put the third bracket into place. “Okay, I think it’s solid now. Thanks.”
“No problem.” I let go of the model’s roof. She tested it, and sure enough, it wasn’t going anywhere now. There were still half a dozen brackets left to put on, but she didn’t need help keeping it still, so I went back to my own model.
My conversation with Teagan echoed in my head as I carefully measured and marked a new piece of foam-core that would be the parking lot beside the library I was building. I always felt weird pretending to be dating a woman when I was with a man, and every single time, I weighed whether it was worth just coming out and, well, coming out. No one in this room would’ve been obnoxious about it. But coming out was never easy, especially as I got older.
This time, though, I wasn’t hung up on whether or not to come out, but what she’d said about things getting serious with “her”. Mostly because I couldn’t argue. Mentally I tried, but I couldn’t.
Maybe she was right, and Rick really did make me grin like an idiot without even realizing it. Normally, I’d have resisted and protested for as long as I had plausible deniability—we’re not serious!—and once that ran out, then I’d admit it. No rushing in. Not for this guy.
But any attempts to deny it to myself didn’t even make sense. It was still too early to tell. I barely knew him. Still, even after just a couple of weeks together and almost as much time spent hanging on my texts and surreptitious glances, Rick was farther under my skin than he should’ve been. In any other situation, that would’ve made me panic, and I’d have backed off, but…not this time. Back off? Forget it. I was getting in over my head and enjoying every second of it.
And as soon as I had some time off, I fully intended to dive in again.
*
At the vending machine for my forty-eighth Red Bull since breakfast, I was counting out a buck twenty-five when sharp footsteps erased my entire brain. Half the people in this building wore suits to work, so dress shoes were hardly unusual, but something about the gait, the way the hard soles clicked on the laminate, told me this wasn’t just anyone.
They stopped behind me.
“Feeling better?” Rick’s voice made my skin tingle.
I turned around and nodded. “Amazing what a little sleep can do.” After a little time with you, I’ll be—oh God. This is that smile Teagan keeps talking about, isn’t it?
“All-nighters are a bitch,” Rick said.
“Says the man who’s the reason I keep having to pull all-nighters.”
Rick’s eyebrows rose. “Are these… I mean, are these only Horizon projects?”
“Uh, well.” I cleared my throat. “Not all. Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to—”
“No, it’s okay. But seriously—are they working you into the ground on my company’s behalf?”
I exhaled, regretting my ill-judged joke. “Not always. But we have yours, and we have others, so if anything’s a rush, or we get backed up…” I shrugged.
“Hmm.” He pursed his lips.
“It’s okay. It’s kind of feast or famine. We’re used to it.”
Rick shook his head. “No, I don’t want you killing yourself over this stuff because of my company, and I’ve explained that to your bosses already.”
“It’s my job. Don’t worry about it.”