Chapter Nine
“Where are we going?”
I look over from the driver’s seat and wink, causing a blush to paint Amelie’s cheeks. “You’ll see. Patience, love.”
“Fine,” she replies, folding her arms across her chest. “Would have been nice if you would’ve at least told me how to dress. I must look ridiculous sitting in such an expensive car, looking like a pauper.”
“Nonsense,” I reply. And I mean it. Even dressed in tight jeans and a loose fitting sweater, Amelie looks incredible sitting in the passenger seat of my vintage Ferrari. She shrugs, and the sweater slides off one of her shoulders, revealing bare, mouthwatering skin. I don’t even think twice before I reach over to run my fingers from her collarbone to her arm, making her shiver. “Absolutely beautiful.”
“You’re insane,” she giggles. “You’re around naked chicks every single day. They’re ready to spread ‘em on command. I know I’m no ogre, but, hell, sex appeal is not really in my repertoire.” She shrugs again, and the sweater slips down further, exposing the swell of one full, naked breast. F*ck. She isn’t wearing a bra.
“Are you trying to make me lose my damn mind and crash my favorite car? You have no idea how f*cking sexy you are.”
“Whatever.”
“Seriously. I can’t even describe it. Naked chicks are a dime a dozen in my profession. But you…you could make a burlap sack look obscene on your body.”
She shakes her head and looks out the window. “It’s fine, Niko. You don’t have to lie. You forget that I know how you are. How often you…have sex. You aren’t exactly subtle when it comes to that stuff. But with me…nothing. I mean, you’re sweet, and gentle, and romantic, and I love all that stuff. But I know I must not turn you on like that. I’ve been sleeping beside you for weeks in skimpy nightgowns, and you haven’t looked once.”
I pull the car over into the parking lot of a pawn shop, and my lips are moving against Amelie’s not even two seconds after the car is in park. My tongue tangles with hers in a rough, aggressive dance, desperate to taste every bit of her. When I pull away, I take her hand and mold it to hardness in my groin, drawing a gasp from her lips.
“Do you feel that? Do you see what you do to me? You did that, Amelie. It’s you that has me so rock hard that I can barely think straight. You and only you. If this doesn’t tell you how badly I want you, I don’t know what will.”
Amelie’s face is beet red with a mixture of fiery passion and bashfulness. But even after I remove my hand from on top of hers, she still grips my dick, kneading it gently through my slacks. I let out a low hiss between my teeth and let my head fall back on the seat.
“Damn, Amelie. Touch me, baby,” I rasp, my voice thick with lust.
Amelie licks her lips before running her fingers over my entire length. Her eyes dance with excitement and hunger, and I can hear her heartbeat pound faster with every timid stroke. The heat of her hand seeps through the fabric of my pants, causing the throb to evolve into an ache. I reach over and run my thumb along her lush bottom lip. The very tip of Amelie’s pink tongue darts out to taste it.
The fire in her eyes, the scent of her arousal that flavors the air between us, her blood racing in her veins with anticipation… I know that Amelie wants this. She wants me. Even after everything I’ve told her, everything she’s seen flash across her subconscious when she closes her eyes, she’s still drawn to me like a moth to a flame. Her nipples harden underneath the veil of her sweater, free and unrestricted without the coverage of a bra. Her breath quickens as she feels me pulsing underneath her fingertips. Her mouth waters as she imagines my taste, my feel.
I could give her what she wants, right here and now in this abandoned parking lot. I could recline her seat and bury myself in her tight body and make those dreams a reality. But I won’t. Amelie is better than that, and she deserves more than some quick f*ck in my car. She deserves tenderness and care. She deserves for me to love her heart and mind, as well as her body.
“We should get going,” I mutter, hating the words even as I say them. I gently grasp her hand and bring it up to my lips, kissing every fingertip before placing it in her lap. Amelie lets out a half groan in response, or maybe in protest, of losing the heaviness of my erection in her hand. Still, I turn and force my eyes back on the road, though I’m almost dizzy with wanting her so damn bad.
Several minutes later, we pull up to a wrought iron gate located in the outskirts of town. Luckily, blood flow has returned to my extremities and I’m able to focus on punching in the key code and maneuvering my way down the long, winding dirt path.
“Where are we?” Amelie asks, seeing the makings of a large plantation-style home through the trees.
I wait until the entire grand estate is in view, before answering. “My house.”
Amelie’s eyes grow large and bright with wonder. “This is your house? You live here?”
“Yeah,” I answer, guiding the car around the fountain in the driveway before coming to a halt. I glance at her awestruck expression as she takes it all in. “Wanna see the rest?”
Amelie nods excitedly. “Yes! Yes, please.”
Before she draws her next breath, I’m outside her door, clicking it open and offering her my hand. She shakes her head, and takes it, a playful smile on those perfect, crimson lips. “Show off,” she teases.
We make our way up the stairs and through the front door, entering the grand foyer that’s immaculately decorated with artwork and tapestries from as early as the Renaissance. Amelie is nearly giddy with curiosity, her eyes and hands eager to explore every inch of the Greek Revival home.
“If you have this house, why the hell do you stay in the city? I mean, it’s nice there too, and nearly as large, but this place … this is spectacular.”
I shrug although I know she can’t see me, as she studies one of the many paintings. “Honestly? It’s more convenient to stay in the city. I need to stay on top of things to ensure everyone is taken care of. Plus … I don’t want to be alone. Even amongst all these treasures, the house seems empty. Lonely. And I hate it.”
Amelie turns to face me, sympathy etched in her soft features. “You’re not alone.” She squeezes my hand and smiles, filling me with comforting warmth. “Even before you even knew I existed, I was with you. A spectator, but I was with you just the same.”
I pull her into my arms, yet stop just before our lips meet. “Why are you so good to me? How can someone so beautiful care for a monster like me?”
“You’re not a monster. No matter what you are, you could never be a monster.”
I kiss her like she’ll disappear in a puff of smoke. As if she is a mythical creature, birthed into an ugly world of disease and pain, sent here to bring beauty to the devastation. Sent here to smother the dark desolation with brilliant, golden light.
“I want to show you the house,” I breathe, my lips still brushing hers. “But I have to admit, all I’m thinking about is the bedroom.”
She giggles and nuzzles her nose against mine. “You’ve had me all to yourself in a bedroom for weeks. Show me your palace, my prince.”
I give her the grand tour, opting to leave the master suite for later. I know that once I lock her in there, she’ll never leave, not if I have anything to say about it. We end sometime later in the kitchen.
“The staff is off for the weekend but my cook left some food for us,” I say, opening up the refrigerator and removing a wrapped platter. “Hungry?”
“I’m always hungry,” Amelie replies with a wicked grin. The possibility that her appetite is for something else entirely causes my dick to twitch and I almost drop the dish of assorted meats, cheeses and olives. Shit. How long has it been? Weeks? A month? How am I even able to walk straight?
We sit at the marble-top island, talking and laughing over finger food and wine while watching the sunset through the floor to ceiling windows, wall-size windows.
“This is amazing,” Amelie breathes, as the setting sun casts hues of pinks and oranges across her face. “I don’t understand why you would ever leave this place. It’s like a museum, but it feels like … home.”
I reach out to grasp her hand, drawing her attention to my earnest expression. “I wouldn’t, if I had a reason to stay.”
“This beautiful home would be reason enough for me,” she shrugs.
“I’m glad you said that. Because that’s exactly what I’m hoping for.”
A cute little crease dimples her forehead in confusion. “What do you mean, Niko?”
I circle the kitchen island to stand before her, placing my hands on the curve of her hips. “I want you to come here to live, so I can be assured that whatever may come for me, you’ll be safe.”
Her eyes search mine for some sign of jest. “And what about you?”
“I’ll keep looking for answers, hoping that whatever happened the other night was a fluke. But I need to focus, and I can’t even think of anything but you when you’re near. Having you at the manor … that’s not a place for you. You belong in beauty, not surrounded by filth. You deserve to dance in the light, not condemned to the dark.”
“Then … no.” Amelie shakes her head and eases off the barstool, turning to leave the kitchen.
“No?” I ask, following her through the dining area.
“No. I’m not staying here.” She turns to face me, her eyes bright and sparkling with conviction. “Not without you. After everything I’ve been through - being ripped from my home, thrown into a freakin’ whorehouse, not to mention, all without an ounce of concern from my father who’s probably drank himself to death by now - the only thing I’ve come to rely on is you. I’ve slept next to you for weeks. I’ve seen you in my dreams a million times. You are the only constant in my life. You are the only reason I am even able to sleep every night. Because no matter what the hell you are and what you’ve done, you were placed in my life for a reason. And dammit, I was placed in yours. So don’t you dare…don’t you dare try to leave me like everyone else.”
I brush away the tears that have begun to slide down her cheeks. Eyes locked on her, I ease my thumb into my mouth and suck the salty moisture, drawing a gasp from her parted lips. I don’t stop there. I taste them all, placing open-mouthed kisses on every tear, soothing her anguish with tenderness, care…and love.
“I won’t leave you, baby,” I whisper between kisses. “I’ll always be with you. Always.”
I kiss her heated cheeks, her soft, lush lips, and the angle of her jaw. Yet, it’s not enough. Not enough to sate the hunger inside me.
“I need to kiss you all over,” I whisper, before running my tongue along the shell of her ear.
“Ok,” she breathes, her pert nipples brushing against my chest.
I lift my head and meet her sultry gaze. I need to know. I need to know that she’s certain. “Ok?”
“Ok,” she nods slowly, almost painfully. “I want you.”
I give her my lips, my tongue, my hands … me. Anything and everything to show her that I want her too, more than I’ve ever wanted anyone. When our mouths finally part, we’re in the master bedroom, surrounded by the soft glow of candlelight.
Amelie steps back, taking her warmth with her. Discontentment begins to flood my chest, but before the storm ensues, she smiles. Smiles at me like I’m somebody to her. Somebody special, deserving of her affection. The only somebody in this entire world that she wants to be with at this very moment, alone in this room.
I can’t wait another second, although my head is screaming at me to slow down and take my time. But shit… I’ve been waiting two f*cking centuries to feel this way. To feel something.
I step forward and grip the hem of her sweater, searching for any sign of doubt. But to my surprise and delight, Amelie lifts her arms above her head, and I am only too eager to comply. My fingers whisper across her waist and ribcage as I draw the fabric up and over her head. Before the sweater can even hit the floor, my lips are already aching to taste her luminescent skin.
“Amelie.” It comes out as a plea … a whimper. Because, f*ck, she’s too beautiful. It almost hurts to be in the presence of something so magnificent. I want to touch her, but for some reason, I don’t. I can’t. My eyes can only devour the expanse of her flat belly, the round heaviness of her breasts, and the delicateness of her collarbone. I’ve never been like this. Shit, I know the female form inside out. But the sheer wonder of Amelie’s body has left me speechless. F*cking speechless.
Almost as if she hears my emotions battling against my hormones, Amelie steps forward and takes my hand in hers. Agonizingly slow and gentle, she brings it to rest on her chest, right over the vital space that houses her heart. The very same place I touched days ago when I contemplated ripping it from her body to end her life. And now, as I feel her heart beat rapidly, the heat of her skin sizzling the surface of mine, I feel as if I have been reborn. Numb and blind for two hundred years, she has just pulled me out of perpetual darkness.
She looks up at me, those peculiar eyes gleaming with longing. “Touch me. Please.”
The fact that she even feels the need to beg has me hating myself. My fingers slide down her torso, taking in the silkiness of her skin, before rising up to meet her breasts. We both groan as I cup them, the nipples hardening against my palm.
“Baby, you…you are…” Shit, I’m a blubbering mess. I rub my thumbs across her nipples before giving her swollen breasts a squeeze. So soft. So f*cking soft. “You are…perfect.”
My lips find hers, my tongue seeking entrance to her mouth, as I explore her body with my hands, the burn coupling with the unrelenting throb in my slacks. I could do this all night. I could be placated with just kissing and touching her like this. But I won’t. I need more of Amelie. I need all of her.
My fingers travel down to her jeans, and I slowly undo the clasp, giving her ample time to stop me. She doesn’t. She only tightens the grip on my hair, as she deepens the kiss.
When her pants lie in a heap next to her shirt after she’s kicked them off in eagerness, I stand back and admire the prize before me bare, unsullied and unashamed. Amelie. My Amelie.
I swallow, but my mouth goes dry. “I said I wanted to kiss you all over, and I fully intend to. But I need to know … is this what you want? Because once you give yourself to me, you’re mine forever. Once I feel you shake beneath me, every one of your trembles will belong to me. Once you call out my name, no other man’s name will fall on your lips in passion. I won’t be able to stand it, Amelie. I’ll kill someone before they get the chance to see what I’m looking at right now. I swear it. You’re too f*cking beautiful for anyone else. Shit, you’re too beautiful for me.”
I don’t even notice that my fists are shaking until Amelie steps forward to still them. “Yours, Niko. I’ve been yours for a decade already. Forever is easy.”
We kiss with a fevered hunger that has us both panting by the time the bed meets the back of her legs. I ease her down gently and just take a moment to admire the view. She smiles up at me sweetly. “You know, it’s kinda hard to kiss me when you’re way up there. And it doesn’t seem fair that you’re still dressed, and I’m pretty much on display here.”
“Then tell me what you want me to do.”
Amelie licks her lips before pinning me with her own naughty glare, and my dick goes from rock hard to granite. “Take your clothes off.”
I do as she wishes, starting with my shirt. Amelie watches with rapt fascination, the scent of her arousal growing stronger and thicker with every button. By the time I undo my pants, she’s squirming and her skin is on fire.
I lay beside her, and we stare at each other, both completely exposed, unable to hide. We see it all - our sins, our virtues. The monsters that live inside us, and the ghosts of our pasts. And, as open as Amelie is for me, I am just as open to her - completely at her will, at her mercy.
“Now what?” I ask, my voice husky.
Amelie swallows down her fear and apprehension. “Kiss me.”
“Where?”
“All over,” she breathes. “Anywhere. Everywhere.”
And I do just that, starting with her throat, resisting the urge to breathe in her sweet essence. Pleasure. This is all about her pleasure. And for once in my life, that’s enough. I trail a path to her breasts, licking the outer mounds. When my tongue worships her nipple, Amelie cries out, and her fingers dig into my shoulders. I draw it entirely in my mouth and suck, causing her body to convulse.
“Careful, love,” I say, smiling against her skin. “I’ve only just started.”
She whimpers something unintelligible and I continue the delicious torment - sucking, licking and nibbling every mouthwatering bit of her as I slowly work my way down her stomach to the tops of her thighs. When I ease her legs apart, she gasps.
“Is this ok?” I ask.
I feel her body tense, but she nods. “Yes.”
Thank. F*ck. After seeing the pure perfection between Amelie’s thighs, covered in only a neat strip of dark hair, there’s no way I can resist now. I’ve seen it. Smelled it. And now, I need to taste it.
I part her gently, feeling her slickness on my fingertips. I start at the insides of her thighs, kissing each tenderly while my thumb still rubs against her *. She’s wet, but I know it’ll take patience and care to get her as wet as I need her.
“Oh God!” she cries out, her quivering building into convulsions. Wetness seeps from her entrance and I rub it into the sensitive *. She’s on the edge, ready to let go. Just as the flood ensues, I slip a finger inside her, and she comes, her tight walls clamping down on the digit. I feel every shudder, every pulse, as she moans my name, submitting to me.
I lower my mouth to her, lapping the sweetness that flows from her, my finger still tucked deep inside her p-ssy, moving in and out, f*cking her, opening her. The erotic sounds she makes coupled with her taste have my head spinning and dizzy with expectation.
“You taste so good,” I groan, my mouth buried in her pink folds.
“Yeah?” she asks, breathless.
“Yeah.” I remove my finger, slick with her juices and offer it to her. “Taste.”
Her mouth falls open in wonder, her eyes heavy with pleasure. “I can’t do that.”
“No?” I smile, easing the finger inside my mouth. “Fine, more for me.” I really let loose then, licking her, sucking her, f*cking her with my tongue. I slip in a finger while my mouth teases her *. Then two fingers plunge inside her, stretching her walls, preparing her for my size. Her legs quiver on my shoulders, and her back and ass arch off the bed.
“Oh God! Oh Niko! I’m, oh my God, I’m...” she screams, and again, her sweet nectar meets my tongue, and I greedily drink every drop.
Her body is covered with a light sheen of sweat, and her breath is ragged when I climb up her body to kiss her lips. My fingers still move inside her slowly, milking her orgasm, and opening her even more. She trembles against my body.
“Niko,” she whines against my mouth, her insides still pulsing with aftershocks. “That was…you are…uh!”
My cock lies against her thigh, throbbing with virility and harder than it’s ever been. Amelie’s petite hand reaches between us and grasps it, causing my whole body to go rigid. I groan as she begins to run her fingers over my length. Even with her inexperience, it feels good. Every touch, every stroke, feels like heaven.
“That’s right, baby. Just like that,” I rasp, thrusting into her palm.
Together, we f*ck each other with our hands. My fingers stretch her p-ssy and plunge deeper and deeper while, she fists my dick from root to tip, her movements growing more confident. When we’re both flush with need for more, I slowly move to position myself between her legs.
“Is this what you want?” I ask, looking down at her with concern.
“Yes,” she nods. “I’ve wanted it for so long …”
I frown. “You have?”
Amelie nods and cups my cheek. “Seeing you with all those women, seeing what a skilled lover you are … I wanted that. I wanted to wear the same looks of pleasure as they did when you were inside them. I wanted it bad. I’d wake up and sometimes I’d…” She turns away, and her cheeks warm with embarrassment.
“Tell me,” I whisper, turning her face back to mine. I ease down and take a nipple into my mouth, hoping to coax the truth out of her.
“Oooh,” she moans. “Yeah, uh, mmmm…I’d wake up throbbing. And wet. I’d ruin my panties.”
“F*ck,” I say, imagining her so timid and disheveled with sleep, her p-ssy slick with desire. Desire for me. “That’s so sexy.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah, baby.” I remove my fingers from inside her, glistening with wetness. She watches as I spread her sweet juices all over her breasts, leaving them sticky with the evidence of her need for me. I lower my mouth to her swells and lick them clean, careful not to waste a drop.
“Now, that’s sexy,” Amelie says, her voice raspy.
I work my way up to her mouth, letting her taste herself on my tongue. She sucks it with eagerness, just as turned on by the act as I am. When the tip of my cock teases her entrance, she jerks, but doesn’t stop me. Still, I pull away. I know she wants this, but for some reason, something inside me won’t let me just plunge into her, and bury myself balls-deep inside those tight, wet walls. I’ve never experienced this … restraint - this feeling of doubt. Amelie has been waiting for this moment for years. I have to make this good for her. I have to make this special.
“Wait.” Just as the hurt begins to creep on her face, I brush my thumb against her swollen bottom lip and smile. “You’ve been dreaming of this for so long, baby. I want to make that dream come true. Tell me about it. Tell me what you want and I’ll give it to you.”
A blush paints Amelie’s cheeks, and she shakes her head. “I can’t. It’s too embarrassing.”
“I promise you, you have no reason to be embarrassed. We’ll take it slow, ok? Tell me - am I on top of you, or are you on top?”
Amelie bites her lip and the blush deepens to a deep scarlet. “I’m on top,” she whispers.
Before she can blink, she’s straddling me as I lay beneath her on my back. Her heavy breasts bounce at the swift movement. “Done. What else?”
“Um, you’re kinda sitting up. Your arms are around me and your face…your face is…” She looks down at her nipples that seem to harden on her unspoken command. Again, I position myself in a blur of movement, eager to do whatever she desires.
“And now?” I ask, sliding my hands up her back.
“And now…now you would grab my ass and lift me up, before easing me on top of you,” she breathes, with a newfound, sexy confidence. “And you would suck my nipples and kiss me so I’m ready for you. And when you get all the way inside me, we’d hold each other tight, while we move together.”
I stare at her with bewilderment, so willing to do as she pleases, yet almost afraid of disappointing her. As if sensing my reluctance, she slides my hands down to her ass, her own hands shaky and damp with nerves. And I realize that she’s not the only one giving herself tonight. She isn’t the only virgin. I may be the furthest thing from pure and virtuous, but I am offering something to Amelie that I have never given another. I am embarking on a monumental first, just as she is.
“Together, ok?” she whispers, kissing my lips. “We can do it together.”
I nod and deepen the kiss, before trailing my tongue to her breasts. I suck hungrily, flicking the nipples in the way that makes her body shake and her p-ssy clench. She moans and pulls my hair, yet pushes my face deeper into her bosom. She rocks on my dick, slickening it with her wetness, telling me that she’s ready.
Hell yes. Ready for me.
Gripping her ass, I lift her slowly, positioning her over my thick cock that stands tall and proud. I let the head tease her swollen entrance, and I can feel her insides already quivering.
“Look at me,” I demand gently. Amelie complies, the topaz in her eyes gleaming brighter than I have ever seen. She smiles at me, and again, I feel like I am dancing on the sun. “You are so beautiful, baby. And I’ve waited too. I’ve been waiting for this too.”
Agonizingly slow, I ease her down, thrusting upward slightly at the same time. Amelie cries out, and buries her face in the crook of my neck, her nails digging into my back. I pause.
“Look at me, baby.” When Amelie complies, I see there are tears in her eyes. “We can stop if you want. We don’t have to do this. Or…or let me help you. Let me take the pain away.”
“No,” she sobs, shaking her head. “I want this. And I want to feel all of you. The pain, the joy, the fear…all of you. I don’t want to be numb for this. I want to feel all of you inside me.”
Proving to me that she means every word, she resumes the slow descent onto my cock, her snug p-ssy nearly sucking me into her body. She grimaces with pain but doesn’t stop, and honestly, I don’t want her to. Even the inch of me that has torn through the barrier of tightness feels f*cking incredible. Warm and wet, hugging me, squeezing me. I tangle my fingers in her hair and kiss her deep, inching up into her as she forces herself down. I swallow her cries of pain and replace them with whimpers of pleasure, as I tug her sensitive nipples.
We freeze in place, gazing at each other in wonder, as I pulse deep inside her. I want to move, but then again, I don’t. I just want to savor this feeling of complete and utter happiness. I just want to remember every single detail and hang onto it forever. I can’t explain it, but I know this very moment is pivotal. It’s like I am supposed to mentally record these emotions running through me. I’m supposed to memorize the feeling of Amelie’s body on top of mine, humid with sweat and heated desire. I am supposed to remember her scent of wildflowers and brown sugar mixed with a tinge of blood, signifying the gift she has given me. I am supposed to commit every moan, sigh and whimper to memory. I know it. I just don’t know why I know it.
“I feel … so full,” she whispers.
“Does it hurt?” I ask, bracing for her reaction.
“Yes. But it’s not so bad anymore. It’s nothing compared to how good it feels. How good you feel.”
I slide my hands up and down her back, eager to touch every part of her inside as well as out. “I’m going to move, baby. You feel so f*cking amazing; I need to feel more of you. Is that ok?”
“Yes, Niko,” she nods, closing her eyes tight. “I want to feel more of you too.”
I guide her hips in a slow grind, and we both moan, completely overwhelmed at how perfectly I fit inside her. Amelie is stiff at first, but as she stretches to accommodate me and the pain subsides, she begins to get into it, circling her hips and ass while pulling at my hair. My mouth never leaves her body, never tasting enough, feeling enough. I’m addicted to every droplet of sweat, just as I am addicted to her tears.
Heat snakes up my spine, shooting into my extremities. Every finger and toe tingles, every inch of my skin sizzles with delicious fire. This isn’t the slight burn I feel when I touch Amelie’s skin that has become so natural to me; this is something different entirely. It’s an inferno of emotion, concentrated and converted into sensation. It floods my veins and attacks every nerve ending, making my whole body tremble with uncontrollable pleasure. The fire begins to burn hotter and brighter, building into a firestorm of unparalleled ecstasy.
We move together faster, harder, hungrier than ever before. Her * rubs against my pelvic bone over and over, and Amelie’s p-ssy clenches with every stroke. She’s f*cking me, taking me, possessing me. Making me hers forever.
The fire inside blazes out of control, and, before I can stop it, or contain it, it explodes. For the first time in years … decades … maybe even a century, I explode. Every muscle cries out, as I spill into Amelie, fighting her fire with my own. She’s right there with me, clawing my back, as she tenses and convulses. Her p-ssy walls squeeze even tighter, drawing out my orgasm, refusing to let go. She pants and whimpers, and her body sags against mine in exhaustion and complete bliss.
When my muscles have finally unwound enough to move again, I lay us down, me on my back and Amelie on top of me, her body still connected with mine. I kiss the top of her head while my hands caress her sweat dampened back.
“Amelie,” I breathe. Even after what we’ve shared, even after all our secrets have been told, saying her name is still a novelty to me. “Amelie, baby.”
“Oui, Monsieur.” She looks up at me, and smiles, her chin resting on her hands.
“How badly do you hurt? Are you sore?” I know I should keep this moment lighthearted, but shit, knowing that I hurt her, even in intimacy, f*cks with me.
“Not sore enough to not want to do it again,” she grins slyly. “But sore enough to know I should wait.”
I lean forward and kiss her cute, little nose, and she giggles. “And yes, I want to do that again,” she adds.
“Me too. Shit, truth be told, I could go again. But you need to heal. Next time, all I want you to feel is pleasure. No pain.”
She smiles, but it doesn’t meet her eyes. “Something the matter?” I ask, brushing her hair from her face.
Amelie shrugs, yet her eyes go glassy and distant. “It’s just … in my dreams, whenever you were with other women, you did something. Breathing, I think you called it. And when you did, you looked so … so hot. And sexy. Like it felt good to you. And with me, you didn’t. Like maybe there’s something wrong with me? Or maybe it wasn’t as good to you? I mean, I know it was my first time, and I’ll get better, but I…”
I swallow her words in a kiss, refusing to let her speak such blasphemy. When we come up for air, I grasp her face in my hands. “Baby, I would never do that to you, and it has nothing to do with you not feeling good to me. Because Amelie, you do. You were amazing, baby. Breathing is a necessity for my kind. It’s how we stay alive - by literally sucking the life out of others. I don’t have to do that with you, and I won’t, because you already brought me to life. With your smiles, your kisses, your laughter. I won’t take an ounce of that away. It’s what makes me…”
…love you.
The words are right there on the tip of my tongue, but I don’t say them. I’ve never said them, not even to my parents. Not even to my brother, the only other person who deserved my affection. Love is not something the Dark speak freely about. We don’t say it because we rarely feel it. And when we do, when we capture that rare and precious emotion, we lock it up tight and cherish it. We live for it. We die for it.
Placated with my explanation, Amelie rests her head on my chest, drawing circles with her fingers against my skin. “What’s this say?” she asks, tracing the dark blue ink embedded over my heart.
“My last name. Skotos.”
“It’s beautiful.” Then she leans over and kisses the Greek lettering that signifies my people … my sin. The mark that represents this monster of a man.
We both fall asleep some time later, with Amelie still nestled against my chest. And for the first time, after an immortal lifetime of starless skies and moonless nights, I dream.