Chapter Nineteen
So this is where she lay at night when she’d sent all those emails.
Curled up on her king-size bed, on top of the wine-red covers, half-naked.
At least, that’s how he liked to imagine her, and how he liked to look at her.
He’d never been one to think much about a woman’s home decor, but something seemed quite fitting about the deep reds, royal purples and gold colors in her bedroom – sexy shades for a woman who exuded sexiness in her style.
On her nightstand was an eReader and he was willing to bet it was well-stocked with the books she loved – adventure tales, she’d told him the night they met. Stories of naval rescues at sea, of daring treks up mountains, of beating the odds. She was an adventuresome woman, and what she read reflected that side of her. A purple scarf was draped over the lamp on the nightstand, and his mind flashed to other uses for that scarf. He checked out the framed photos on her bureau – pictures of her sister and her, and her sister and a dog too.
“That’s McKenna’s dog. Ms. Pac-Man,” Julia said.
“Cute dog.”
“She is cute and smart,” Julia said, a note of pride in her voice, almost like an aunt beaming about a child. “She’s also loyal and devoted.”
“As a dog should be.”
“And a person,” she added.
“Yes,” he said, agreeing emphatically. “Are you loyal and devoted?”
She nodded, her face serious, her green eyes holding his gaze. There was a fierceness in her look. A certainty. “I only want you. I only think of you,” she said.
“I know the feeling well.”
She patted her bed. “I like the way you look in my apartment.”
“I like the way you look right now,” he said, climbing up on her bed and joining her.
“Are you going to take off those pants and stay the night?” She asked, eyeing his half-dressed state.
“I am considering it,” he said in a wry tone.
“What can I do to convince you?”
He was surprised to find her voice stripped bare of flirting as she posed the question. He was used to her seductive side, the way she’d trail her fingernails along his arm to get what she wanted. But this was a newer side of Julia, a vulnerable one, and it gave him hope that she was finally opening up to him.
He ran his index finger along her jawline. He swallowed, taking a beat. He was going to put it out there. Put himself out there. “Let me in,” he said, as he moved his fingers to her heart, tracing it.
“How?” she asked in a wobbly voice.
“Tell me why you’re scared. Tell me why you ran.”
She sighed heavily, shifting from her side to her back. She closed her eyes; her face seemed pinched. He ran his hand along her bare arm. “Hey,” he said softly. “You’re here now. I’m here now. I want to know what I need to do so I don’t scare you away.”
She opened her eyes, turned back to face him. Her expression was softer now. “It’s nothing you can or can’t do. It’s me.”
“Right. It generally is. But tell me how I can help you be comfortable with you and me,” he said. “Because for a while there I was damn sure you were history. My friend Michele even said so in no uncertain terms.”
Like she’d been burned, Julia jerked away from him, sitting up straight. “Michele? Who’s Michele? Your ex?”
He laughed. “Michele is just a friend. Davis’ sister. Known her for years. She also happens to be a shrink.”
“You were talking to her about me?” Julia crossed her arms.
“Yes,” he said, tugging on her hips, trying to pull her back to lie next to him. But she scooted further away into the jumble of pillows by her headboard. “Hey, I was talking to her about you because I like you, woman. Get that straight.”
She narrowed her eyes. Fixed him with a harsh stare. But said nothing.
“And I was trying to understand you, and I still don’t entirely understand, so help a man out.”
“Fine, but I don’t want other women touching you,” she said sharply as she glared at him.
Another laugh took hold of him, deep and rumbling through his chest. It warmed him up, knowing how possessive she was. “I believe I’ve made it patently clear that I am a one-woman kind of man, and you are my kind of woman. But this conversation isn’t about me. I want to know what’s going on with you,” he said, succeeding this time in tugging her alongside him.
She took a breath, pursed her lips together, then exhaled. She looked him square in the eyes; her pretty greens were tinged with sadness and a trace of fear. His heart lurched towards her, wanting to help her, reassure her. She licked her lips, and spoke in a wobbly voice that grew stronger as she pushed through. “I’ve got some trouble from my past chasing me. And I can’t say anything more, because I don’t want you or anyone I care about to get caught up in my problems.”
He started to speak, to tell her he wasn’t afraid of problems, and he certainly didn’t expect anyone to come to a relationship baggage-free, but she held up her hand to silence him.
“Eventually, I’ll be free of it, but right now there’s just stuff I have to deal with, and that’s why I left so quickly,” she said, her voice raw and pained. “I’m sorry.”
“Is somebody hurting you?” he asked, clenching his fists as he kept his voice on an even keel. He didn’t want to scare her, but he sure as hell would scare anyone who laid a hand on her.
“No,” she said quickly, shaking her head. “Nor do I have a pill problem or anything like your ex, I swear.” She gripped his bicep, digging her fingers into his flesh to make her point. “I promise.”
“That is excellent news. But what sort of trouble is it, then?”
“Clay,” she said, soft, but insistent in her tone. “That’s all I want to say. I have to keep the people I care about out of it. And I care about you. So deeply, and more than I ever thought I would,” she said, reaching for his hand, and threading her soft fingers through his. “So much more,” she added, squeezing his hand for emphasis, and her touch sent a shiver through him. She kissed his hand. By god, he could get used to this side of her. He would love to see this part of her every day. “It’s my problem to deal with, and I’m dealing with it.”
He wanted to help her, but he wasn’t sure she’d let him so he tried another way to understand the scope of this problem. “Is it something I should be worried about?”
She shook her head. “No.”
He raised an eyebrow, studying her face, trying to read her. He wasn’t sure what was going on, but something in his gut said she was telling the truth. Or maybe he just wanted to believe her. Maybe he could. For now, at least. “Okay, I will try my best not to worry for now then,” he said, though he knew that would be a tall order because already – deep in his gut – he was concerned for her, for everything about her. He wanted to protect her, look out for her. That she was hardly the kind of woman who needed taking care didn’t factor into his thinking one bit. She was his and he couldn’t abide by anyone hurting her.
“Good,” she said, and her face lit up again, her mischievous grin reappearing as she danced her fingers down his chest. “So to what do I owe the pleasure of this surprise late-night visit?”
“In town for a meeting. I’m seeing Chris tomorrow about his renegotiations.”
“McKenna didn’t mention it to me.”
He tapped her nose. “It was last-minute. Just scheduled it today and caught an evening flight. I’m heading to L.A. early afternoon, so I’m squeezing the meeting in beforehand.”
“I am glad you squeezed me in,” she said, her hand darting to the waistband of his pants. “Now, have I successfully convinced you to take these off and spend the night with me? I’m not much of a cook but I do know where I can take you tomorrow morning for some fantastic pancakes.”
He pretended to think deeply about the food. “I do love pancakes.”
“And spending the night with me. You better love that too,” she said, playfully swatting him.
“I believe I could find it in me to enjoy another night with you.”
“Wait. Where’s your bag?”
“In the town car. Driver’s waiting outside.”
“So you could make a getaway?”
He shook his head. “Gorgeous, when is it going to get through to you that I’m not the one who’s running? Nor am I a presumptuous a*shole who’s going to show up at your doorstep with an overnight bag unless you want me to.”
“I want you to,” she said in a sexy purr.
He dialed his driver, and a minute later, there was a knock on the door. Clay retrieved his bag, tipped the driver and said goodnight. He returned to Julia’s room to find her leaning against the wall, her shirt shucked off and her stockings removed, wearing only her red pumps. Her hips jutted out seductively and his dick rose to full attention as he drank in the sight of her, the moonlight casting midnight blue shadows across her long and lean body, highlighting her curves.
“You didn’t think I was going to bed, did you?”
“Not for a second.”
“I want to show you one of my favorite positions.”
“I have a feeling it’s going to be one of my favorite positions too,” he said as he kicked off his pants, and placed them on a chocolate brown chair in the corner of her bedroom.
She pointed to the bed. “Take off the briefs, and sit down.”
“At your service,” he said, stripping off his final layer, and parking himself on the edge of her bed. She looked him over from head to toe, and he wasn’t going to deny it – the hunger in her eyes was the biggest turn-on of his life. She stared at him like she’d never wanted anyone so much. As if she had never laid eyes on a man she wanted to feast on like this. Tremors rolled through him, and he ached with desire for her. A low growl took hold in his chest as she strutted over to him. The sight of her gorgeous body was something he’d never get enough of. She stopped, placing her hands on his shoulders, leaning into him so her breasts brushed his face. A bolt of heat tore through him, and he reached for her, craving closeness, needing her beautiful body pressed against his. But she pulled back, wagging her finger, then walked away, heading for her nightstand. She grabbed the purple scarf and returned.
“What’s good for the goose is good for the gander,” she said in that sexy, smoky voice that could lead him to say yes to anything she wanted.
“You tying me up?”
“Just a little bit,” she said, as she straddled him, sitting across his thighs. He felt the heat from her p-ssy even though she wasn’t close to touching his cock. Still, being near his favorite place made his dick throb. She pressed against him once more, reaching her arms around him. She tugged at his hands on the mattress, adjusting them behind his back. She wrapped the scarf around his wrists, tying them together.
“Hey Julia, I got a question for you,” he said as she tugged on the ends of the scarf.
“I grant you permission to ask.”
He chuckled. “I haven’t been with anyone in several months and I’m clean. How about you? Any chance you’re on birth control?”
She leaned back, looked him in the eyes. “I am indeed. You saying you want to feel me coming on your cock in just a few minutes?”
He narrowed his eyes and growled a hot yes.
“Then, you can come and play without a glove,” she said, gripping his cock in her fist. His hips nearly shot off the bed at her touch. Anything she did to him sent shocks of pleasure through his bones.
“I can not wait to feel your hot p-ssy surrounding me.”
“You won’t have to wait much longer, because I’m wet for you,” she said said, dropping her free hand between her legs and stroking herself.
His chest tightened and his dick throbbed in her hand. He watched her hungrily as she coated her fingers in her own wetness, then brought her finger to his lips.
“Rub yourself on me,” he instructed her.
“As you wish.” She traced his mouth and he licked his lips, drinking up the taste of her.
“More,” he said, and his blood flowed thick and heavy as she slipped her fingers inside her p-ssy, drawing out more of her delicious juices. She dragged her fingers against him once more, and this time, he sucked on her index finger, drawing it all the way into his mouth, lapping up every delicious ounce of her desire. “You taste f*cking spectacular.”
“Oh I do, do I?” she said seductively, brushing her breasts against his chest.
“You do, Julia. I love your taste, and your smell, and right now you smell like you want me inside you.”
“I want to ride you so bad,” she said, and swiveled around, straddling him again, only this time her back was to him.
“You are a cruel woman. You know I want to touch your breasts right now.”
“And squeeze them too,” she added, as she positioned herself over him, rubbing the head of his cock between her legs. Heat seared in his body, like flames licking across his skin. She leaned her head back, her gorgeous red hair fanning out across his chest and his shoulders, taunting him. He craved the chance to grip it hard, and tug, and she knew it. As she rubbed her wetness over him, she licked his neck up to his ear, driving him mad with desire. “Ask for it,” she purred.
“F*ck me please,” he said, his breath jagged as lust poured through every inch of his body.
She sank down on him, and he groaned loudly. The feel of her hot p-ssy gripping him tight was like a fevered dream. But it was real, everything real and raw and lingeringly primal in the way she rode him, taking her time, rising up and down on his cock, riding him like he was her plaything, and he wanted nothing more than to be just that in this moment.
His hands itched to touch her, to grab her hips, to hold on hard to her beautiful breasts. But he knew she was the kind of woman who let herself be dominated, but in return sometimes she needed to take the reins. He let her have all the control, enjoying the view of her perfect body moving up and down on him as her moans grew louder, and more erratic, until she was shouting his name, and the feel of her hot cream gushing over his cock was all he needed to join her in climax.
*****
The hot water beat down on his head and he soaped up Julia’s breasts. For the twentieth time. Though it might have been the thirtieth, or fortieth. Hard to count. They were too hard to resist.
“Hey, Mister. I’m pretty sure my breasts are scrub-a-dub clean. There’s not an ounce of dirt on them,” she said, poking his chest.
“Mmm…Let me just make sure,” he said, lathering them up once more. “You might be able to hypnotize me with these breasts.”
“You will do my bidding,” she said as she swayed her chest in a mesmerizing rhythm, then her hand quickly darted up and she snagged the soap from him. “Ha!” She held it up victoriously. “Now, I can finally get clean because this gal wants to go to sleep.”
He grabbed the soap back from her, tugged her sexy body against his. “Let me. I promise to wash the rest of you.”
“Fine,” she said, holding out her hands. “Have at me.”
He kneeled down in the shower, the water pelting his back as he washed her legs, then gently between her legs, then back up to her belly and down her arms. He rubbed the soap once more against his palms, then dropped it in the soap dish and washed her neck. She leaned her head back, exposing the delicious column of her throat to him. Tenderly, he ran his hands over her, then positioned her under the water and rinsed her off. He wrapped his arms around her, her trim waist fitting perfectly in his embrace. “Mmm. I like holding you,” he whispered, as he closed his eyes.
He could feel her smiling as she molded her body against his, taking what he was giving her. “I know,” she said in a soft, sleepy voice. “I like being held by you, Clay. And I’m so glad you’re here tonight.”
It was the so that took hold in his heart, finding purchase, tethering him to her. He thought he could deny himself. He almost believed he could forget her. But he was too far gone to let her go. She was his, and there were simply no two ways about it. She had to be in his life. “Me too.”
Soon, she broke the embrace, and took her turn washing him, working her nimble hands across his body, the mischievous look in her eyes telling him that she enjoyed touching him as much as he craved her touch. She stopped at his arm, running a finger along the lines of his tattooed bicep. “Passion,” she said, in a reflective voice. “This is so you. It’s perfect for you. You are the most passionate man I have ever known. You are passionate in your heart, and passionate in bed, and passionate in your beliefs, and in every single thing you do.”
He got him. She knew him. She understood who he was and what made him tick. It was heady being that connected to someone. “It’s easy to be passionate with you, Julia.”
“And thank you for letting me do that just now in the shower,” she said, trailing her fingers across his shoulder.
“For washing me?” He arched an eyebrow in question.
She nodded. “And for letting me tie your hands.”
“As I’ve said before, I’ve got no issues. No hangups. I’m pretty much game for anything and good to go.”
“I like that.”
“What about you? Anything you don’t want me to do?” He asked as she turned the shower off and handed him a towel, taking another one for herself.
She didn’t answer immediately; instead she folded her towel in half, then in quarters, the long way. He watched her curiously. She raised the towel to her eyes. A knowing grin broke across his face for having gotten her charade.
“Got it. No blindfolding.”
She returned to drying off. “I just like to be able to see, that’s all. Blindfolding is the only thing that I’m not wild about. And it’s not because I have some terrible past with trauma about blindfolding. But the thought of it makes me feel a bit too vulnerable, and for a woman with trust issues, well, I’m not sure it’s the best kind of kink for me.”
She hung up her towel on a hook and he did the same.
“There are many other forms of kink that I’m more than happy to try with you, Julia,” he said, then reached for her hand and led her back to her bedroom. Once they slipped under the covers, he wrapped his arms around her, then brushed her hair away from her ear. “I guess I’ll just have to imagine then how you’d look with my tie over your eyes, wearing nothing but stockings, sitting in a chair and touching yourself while I watch.”
She craned her neck to give him a curious stare. “Is that your fantasy?”
He nodded. “It is one of many.”
“Maybe someday, handsome. Maybe someday.”
“I have another fantasy,” he murmured softly in her ear, tugging her closer as they spooned.
“What’s that?” she asked curiously.
“Falling asleep with you in my arms.”
“I think that’s about to become your reality.”
“Lucky me.”