“I’ve seen some of them and the movies,” Annie states.
“I had a Sex and the City marathon with my friend when she, uh, broke her leg and couldn't do anything.” Actually, that’s not true. It was after Vanessa got her nose done. “Like, for four days straight we did nothing but watch the series. And on there they talk about the third date as being the sex date.”
And didn’t Tommy say something like that too?
“Yeah, but they’re grown up. I think it’s different when you date boys our age. Like, you don’t want to be just doing it with anyone. And you want them to respect you,” Katie says.
“So, basically, there are no rules. You just go with what you feel like?”
Maggie laughs. “Well, no, if we went with what we felt like, we’d all be sluts.”
We all laugh.
Annie says, “It really is hard for girls. I don’t think guys even understand. I don’t think parents understand. They tell us don’t do it; be a good girl. Our bodies tell us we should be doing it. Like, it used to be once you got your period, you were a woman. You got married and had sex. Guys want you to do it, but they don’t want you to do it too soon. And if you don’t do it soon enough, sometimes they’ll dump you. So then you think, I’ll wait until I find a guy who really loves me. But then some guy tells you he loves you, you do it, and he decides he doesn’t. Society tells us not to do it, but then we have all these sexy images of how we should look. It’s really confusing.”
“That’s true,” I say. “I think everyone has to make their own decision. Whatever your age. I think whatever is right for you is what you should do.”
Katie digests it all and says, “True.”
Maggie says, “So, I think it’s a combination of how the guy treats you, how much you like him, if he seems serious, and if he respects you.” Then she adds naughtily, “And then, when you can’t say no any longer, you give in.”
Annie says, “So, we know Katie’s only done it with her boyfriend—wait, have you and Tyrese?”
“No. I can’t with him. I mean, he’s hot and he’s probably good at it, but we’d definitely have to be going out first. And then, I’d still wait some.”
Annie turns to me, “And you’ve been with two guys, and I haven’t done it yet. Maggie, have you ever had a random hookup?”
Maggie says, “Well, yeah.”
“And?!”
“I can’t decide if I’d rather deal with a stupid boyfriend and all the love bullshit, or the shame I feel after I hookup.”
“That’s pretty deep,” I tell her. “Okay guys, I’m calling bedtime.”
I go to sleep, and my dreams are haunted by satyrs, evil love gods, and a centaur with Vincent’s face. Then I’m in a meadow, dressed in a white gown with golden trim. I walk out to the middle of the clearing and meet the man I’m getting ready to marry. He’s blurry, though, because I’m wearing a veil, but I can see from his outline he is very handsome, and in my heart I know that I love him. We have the wedding, say I do, and he kisses me through the veil.
Then he takes me out of the clearing to his dorm room for our honeymoon, and I’m sitting on a chair straddling him, like I was Dawson earlier today.
We are kissing and kissing through the veil, and he’s taking off my wedding gown. Then I’m naked except for my veil, and we’re consummating our marriage.
Finally, he lifts the veil in the middle of the consummation to kiss me. And there, staring back at me, is not the Dawson that I expect to see.
It’s Aiden, wearing a gold laurel wreath around his head.
I wake up sort of throbbing down there.
And wondering, what the hell?
Thursday, September 8th
It’s tutoring with food.
French.
When I walk into French, my teacher, Miss Praline, pulls me aside. “Aiden said you won’t be tutoring him. I’d like you to reconsider that.”
“Why?”
“He really struggles in French and barely passed last year, so he’s already behind. He needs this to get into an Ivy League school, which is his goal. I’ll give you extra credit.”
“I don’t need extra credit. I’m very good at French.”
“Please?”
“No. He’s not nice to me.”
“Look, I have an idea. What if I got you on the Social Committee? It’s teacher nominated and you seem to be quite social. I think you would do well on it.”
I think about that for a minute. Dawson thought about getting on it, and I know it’s considered a big deal. Way bigger than Student Council, and it would mean I could help plan dances and events like I wanted to do at my old school. Hmmmm. “Fine. I’ll do it.”
I take my seat, turn around, and try not to look directly at Aiden’s mouth. “So, I heard you really suck at French.”
He frowns a little, and it looks so odd on his mouth.
Shit.
I was not supposed to be looking at his mouth. I seriously need to find a pair of magic Spanx and become a virgin again.
“Yeah, I do,” he says.