“It’s a reasonable question. You’ve been spending time together. You’re sexual partners. You stayed at her house. It’s obvious you care about her and she must feel the same way. After all, she’s trusting you with her child. For a single mother, that is more emotionally significant than inviting you into her bed.”
Patience in love with him? He hadn’t considered the possibility. She wasn’t, he told himself. They were friends and there was chemistry, but anything more...
What? Anything more was out of the question? Why would Patience think that? She didn’t know enough about him to realize how damaged he was, and she wasn’t the type to trust easily.
“I can see by the look on your face that you hadn’t considered that things might have gone further than you anticipated.”
“Did she say something?” he asked.
“No, but we’re not that close. I doubt she would confess her feelings to me. Besides, she knows you and I are friends and she would be concerned about my loyalties. Female friendship is based on emotional sharing rather than events.”
Justice glanced around, as if looking for escape. “I care about her,” he admitted. “A lot. She’s special. Sweet and funny. Lillie’s great and Ava’s tougher than any soldier I know.”
“But?”
He turned to Felicia. “You know me, probably better than anyone. Do you have to ask why it would be a mistake?”
“Yes.”
He turned away and started for the car. Felicia caught up with him and put her hand on his arm.
“Your father is dead, Justice. You’re not him. You’ve made your own way. If you were going to turn out like Bart Hanson, it would already have happened.”
He glared at her. “I killed. I was a sniper. They didn’t come looking for me, Felicia. I volunteered. You know what Bart was. How can you know what I willingly did and not say I’m just like him? The only difference is I stay on the right side of the law.”
“Exactly. You respect the rules of society. You understand the dynamics of a community being more successful than a single individual. We all have darkness inside us. Life is about balance. That doesn’t make you your father.”
“You know that for sure?” he asked bitterly.
“Yes. I know it empirically and I believe it in my heart. I have faith in you. You’re the one who thinks otherwise.” She released his arm, but her affectionate gaze held him as firmly in place.
“She’s who you came looking for,” she said softly. “If you won’t trust yourself, then at least trust her.”
Six months ago, he would have told her she was wrong. But now he wasn’t so sure. Felicia was right about Patience. She believed enough for ten men.
* * *
“MAYBE I should go back to college,” Felicia said, holding her latte in both hands.
“Is there a degree you don’t have?” Patience asked.
They were sitting in Brew-haha. Felicia had come in and Patience had joined her. The store was quiet, at least for now. Patience glanced toward the clock on the wall. The midmorning lull would give way to the late-morning rush, but for this moment in time, there were only a few customers.
“I was thinking of getting a teaching credential. I like kids.” Felicia shrugged. “But I don’t know if I’m any good with them. Do you think I could volunteer at a local school and find out?”
“You don’t have very long. School’s out in a couple of days.”
“Oh.” Felicia’s green eyes turned sad. “That’s right. Summer is traditionally the time for a long vacation. When I lived at the university, I worked year-round, so I didn’t pay much attention to things like breaks and vacation.” She frowned. “Of course, that would explain why there were suddenly fewer people in the lab.”
Patience was glad she and Felicia had made friends, but she had to admit the other woman was fairly strange. Not scary, just different. She’d always assumed that being smart was an asset, but Felicia proved the cliché of “too much of a good thing.”
“Won’t you be spending the summer helping Justice and his friends get CDS up and running?”
“I’m only helping them organize the space and then setting up accounting books and making a schedule.”
Only, Patience thought, remembering how long she’d worked to get her store open. “Something you could do over a long weekend?”
“Probably. The physical work will take longer, but the guys can do that.” She sipped her latte.
“What about medical school?” Patience asked.
“I’ve thought about that. The thing is I’m not very good with people.” She managed a slight smile. “You may have noticed.”
“You have a different style,” Patience said diplomatically. “Are you concerned you wouldn’t be able to relate to your patients?”
“Mostly. I imagine I would start talking about their disease and then I’d forget myself and draw a technical diagram. By the end of our conversation, he or she would have either fainted or run screaming from the room.” She looked at Patience. “I wish I was more like you.”
Just One Kiss (Fool's Gold #10)
Susan Mallery's books
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- Just One Kiss
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