Chapter Thirteen
Xander watched as Jerred stepped out of the apartment door, kissed the woman lingering, then started down the corridor.
He’d never seen his friend like this. First there was the hostility when he’d arrived. In the days since then, he’d taken great care to keep the woman hidden in his apartment. The only times she’d gone out, he’d been with her and he’d guarded her closely. No man was allowed to talk to her, let alone touch her.
It intrigued Xander.
He’d known Jerred all his life, and they’d shared women together more than once. Jerred had never been the jealous type. He’d always enjoyed women, but never asked anything of them. Sometimes he found them in the bars around spaceports, but more often he preferred to hire them for an hour or two.
He had always said it helped keep things from getting complicated. As a man who liked to keep his relations with women uncomplicated, Jerred was definitely in over his head with this one. Xander could only think of one reason that such a thing might happen.
The woman had to be his old friend’s life mate.
He’d tried to talk to Jerred the day before, but the man had refused to see him. The woman possessed him, consumed him, and he seemed completely unaware of what must be going on. If the girl was his life mate, she needed to be recognized at the temple and granted formal status. Until then she had no place in the station hierarchy. Given how protective Jerred was of her, that could lead to someone’s death if they made the wrong move. Xander didn’t want to see that happen.
Jerred needed to be brought to his senses.
He waited until he was sure Jerred was gone, then pushed himself away from the shadow where he’d been standing and walked to the apartment door. He nodded, waiting for her to respond.
He didn’t have to wait long.
“Jerred, is that you?” she asked through the com panel.
“No, I’m a friend of Jerred’s. My name is Xander,” he said slowly, trying to keep his voice neutral and unthreatening. It was hard; her presence called to him. As an unmated man, he found it hard to be around women, especially those he couldn’t have. There was something about another man’s life mate that could drive a warrior slowly mad with lust. Their culture was wise to keep the women away from the unmated males. Otherwise, there would be a bloodbath; she couldn’t stay here.
“What do you want?” she asked, and he could hear the tension in her voice. Jerred must have warned her about the men on the station. At least he hadn’t completely lost his mind, Xander thought with a tinge of dark humor.
“I’ve come to talk to you,” he said. “You don’t have to let me in, but I do need a few minutes of your time. It’s about Jerred.”
“I’m listening,” she said. “But not for long. I’m not going to open the door.”
“All right,” he said, looking up and down the hallway. It really was a shame she wouldn’t let him in. Out here he was more likely to be seen. If Jerred found out, he would kill him. Still, a man had to die some time, and at least then the horrible burning, aching emptiness within him would be gone. Sometimes he thought death would be a mercy.
“Do you know that Saurellians can only mate permanently with someone called a life mate?” he asked through the door, feeling ridiculous.
“Yes,” she said, and he could have sworn her voice held a touch of hurt. Good. She cared about him.
“Well, you’ve probably heard that only Saurellian women can be life mates, then,” he said.
“Yes.”
Her tight, strained intonation spoke volumes. He sighed.
“Maybe you don’t realize that in the past year, several Saurellian men have found life mates who aren’t Saurellian.”
Silence. He took a deep breath and forged ahead. “I think you might be one of them.”
“Don’t play games with me,” she said. “This is cruel.”
“It’s the truth,” he replied slowly. “Jerred probably doesn’t believe it’s possible, and the odds are certainly against it. But he’s showing all of the signs of a man who’s found his mate.” I should know , he thought bitterly. I’ve watched enough of my friends and brothers find their loved ones on Saurellia.
He pushed the disloyal thought out of his head. The Goddess decreed which men would have mates and which would suffer alone. Still, the irrational part of his mind screamed out at him to break down the door and take her.
After all, if she could mate with Jerred, why not him? He pushed the thought back and took a deep breath.
“You need to go to the Temple,” he said shortly. “They’ll be able to tell you if you’re the one for him.
You need to know this, for both your sakes.”
“How do I go to the Temple?” she asked, softly. “And why should I believe you?”
“You should believe me because I care about Jerred,” he said. “Despite what you may think, we’ve been friends forever, and I’m afraid he might lose his only chance for happiness. Not to mention your only chance for happiness. The life mate bond goes both ways, you know, and it only ends with death.”
Silence. He shook his head, hoping she was still listening. She didn’t exactly have a reason to believe him, after all.
“All you need to do is get on the ’net and look up the local temple,” he said. “Call them. Talk to the priestess. They’ll help you make the arrangements you need to make.”
“What makes you think they’ll believe me?” she asked.
“Whether they believe you or not, they have a duty to check your story out,” he said. “Tell them about Jerred, and tell them that I came to talk to you as well. Make them understand that you need their help.”
“I’ll think about it,” she said slowly. “Why are you telling me all of this?”
“Because I want Jerred to be happy,” he muttered through gritted teeth. Deep down inside, he knew it was true. That didn’t make it any easier, though.
“He loves you and I know it,” he said softly. “It’s written all over his face, in every step he takes. I’m just worried that he’ll let his own fears get in the way of his happiness. If it were me,” he paused to take a breath, swallowing deeply. “If it were me, he’d do the same.”
She fell silent, and he turned quickly and walked away. If only it were him. If only the Goddess was that kind.
* * * * *
Giselle found the number for the station’s Temple. She still wasn’t quite sure what to think of Xander’s strange visit. Was he playing some kind of sick game with her? She shuddered to think how humiliating it would be if he was… On the other hand, what if he was right? Even a chance to have Jerred as her own was worth any humiliation. Taking a deep breath, she pressed the call button.
Almost immediately a man’s face appeared on the screen. He smiled at her, and she realized there was something different about him. He didn’t have that tense, questing look she had come to associate with Saurellian males.
“Hello,” she said softly. “I need some information, I think.”
He smiled at her reassuringly. “Go on,” he said. “I’ll do my best to help you.”
“I think that Jerred, uh, the man I’ve been seeing, is my life mate. Does that make any sense to you?”
A look of surprise came over his face, but he quickly masked it.
“Well, there is a slight possibility that this is true,” he said. “But it’s very unlikely. I’m sorry, but I have to be honest with you about this. Many young women imagine they are life mates when they meet a handsome Saurellian soldier, but it’s rarely true. Why is it that you think he might be your life mate?”
She blushed, unsure of how to answer without sounding silly. Somehow, I think I’d just die without him, seemed juvenile at best.
“I’m not really sure,” she said finally. “I realize that it may just be wishful thinking, but I really do love him. And I think he loves me, too. I think we’re just both afraid to let ourselves say it because we know it can’t last.”
The man nodded grave, a look of compassion on his face. “Well, I don’t wish to hurt you, but it is most likely that what you are feeling is infatuation. I want you to be very honest with yourself and answer this question for me. Does he really care for you as much as you care for him?”
“I’m sure he cares for me as much as I care for him,” she said softly, knowing it was true. “I can feel it in the way he touches me, and how he looks at me.”
The man nodded his head slowly, his expression still non-committal. “If you would like to come to the Temple, we would be able to do a reading on you,” he said. “That way you will know for sure. But I need to warn you that the reading may not go as you would like.”
“I’d rather know,” she said softly. “In my heart, I know I need to be with him. If I’m deluding myself, it’s better to find out now.”
“All right,” the man said. “Can you come here yourself, or would you like us to send someone to fetch you?”
“I want you to send someone for me,” she said quickly. “Jerred has been very clear that I shouldn’t go outside by myself. He says it isn’t safe.”
The man’s face turned thoughtful. She wanted to ask him what his thoughts were, but decided it wasn’t a good idea.
“We’ll send someone for you shortly,” he said. “I have your address from your call number. Be sure to leave a message telling Jerred where you are; you don’t want him to worry about you.”
“Or tear apart the station looking for me,” she added, grimacing. His expression turned thoughtful again, and then he faded out.
The knock on her door came more quickly than she’d expected. She had just finished the note for Jerred, when they arrived. To her surprise, they had a private pod waiting for her, parked right beside the open walkway. Somehow it hadn’t occurred to her that pods would be allowed to navigate through the open air of the galleries, but she supposed the Temple must have special privileges. There were two people waiting for her, a man and a woman. To her surprise, it was the same man she had talked with over the com. The woman was tall and striking in that way she had come to expect from Saurellian women. She held out one hand to Giselle and gave her a gentle smile.
“Come with me, child,” she said. She looked so young that Gisele was taken aback for a moment by her tone. Then she noted small strands of grey in the woman’s hair, and the tiniest of lines around her eyes.
She was older than she looked.
She took her hand, and together they stepped into the pod. “I am Grania,” the woman said. “I’m a priestess at the temple. Velor,” she nodded toward the man, “is my life mate. I must say, I find your situation unusual. We do occasionally get calls from young women who feel they have a special connection with one of our warriors, but I find that it usually isn’t true.”
“Well, I’m only here because Xander, Jerred’s friend, told me to call you,” Giselle said softly, feeling embarrassed. This was probably some sort of sick prank. How horrible. She wished she could bolt back to the apartment.
“Really?” the woman asked. She and her spouse exchanged unfathomable looks, and then she leaned in more closely to Giselle.
“Tell me about this Xander,” she said.
Giselle blushed to realize how little she knew.
“I’ve only met him twice,” she said slowly. “He and Jerred grew up together. He told me that, and Jerred told me, too. When we first met him, he said some really nasty things about me, and he and Jerred almost got into a fight. I thought Jerred was going to kill him.”
“Go on,” the woman said.
“Then he came to the apartment earlier today. I was afraid of him at first, because of what happened before. But he said that Jerred was acting strangely, and that I should call you. He said there might be a chance that Jerred and I were life mates but that Jerred was too scared to admit it.”
The woman patted her hand comfortingly, and smiled at her again. There was something incredibly soothing about that smile. Giselle felt calm wash over her.
“Well, we’ll know soon enough,” the woman said. “We’re almost to the temple now.”
The pod came to a stop and the door slid open. Grania took Giselle’s arm and led her gently from the vehicle. She looked around, expecting some kind of monument or grand entrance. Instead they were in something that looked more like a garage.
“We’re taking the back door in,” Grania said, as if reading her thoughts. “Not quite as impressive, I know, but far more convenient. I hope you don’t mind?”
Giselle shook her head, bemused by the woman’s practicality. She looked so stately that it was hard to imagine she thought about things like parking pods. A guard nodded to them as they left the garage, walking into a lavishly appointed corridor. Unlike much of the station, which was largely utilitarian, the floor here was tiled, and there was a different kind of smell in the air. The scent of living things. Perhaps there was a garden?
Her question was answered as they walked through another arch into a large, open area. All around were trees and birds. Grass covered the ground, and in the distance a sun seemed to be shining down on them.
“What is this?” she asked with a gasp.
“This is the temple,” the woman said in a soft, sweet voice. “The grounds here are twenty-five miles across. What you see up above is our ‘sun’—the engineers built and maintain it for us. Even here in the middle of the station, it gives our people a taste of home.”
“It’s amazing,’ she said. “Are all your temples like this one?”
“Most of them,” Grania replied. “They’re built as a reflection of the central temple on Saurellia. Of course, they’re different sizes in different places. On a small station they might feel more like a greenhouse than this.”
Giselle nodded her head slowly, eyes searching all around.
“This place is amazing,” she said softly. “I can hardly believe it’s real.”
They started walking along a stone-lined path, and within moments Giselle had lost sight of the doorway they’d entered through.
“It’s not far,” Grania said. “We’ll be going to our house for a while, and then perhaps to the main temple precinct.”
“How far is it?’ Giselle asked.
“It will only take us a few minutes to get there,” Grania said. “There are many, many entrances to the temple. One can almost always enter near one’s destination, which is important. There is no motorized travel allowed within the sanctuary, which means you will have a long walk if you come in at the wrong place. Of course, one of the reasons we have such a large space is precisely so people can walk. We find that walking with the Goddess often helps to clear the mind.”
Giselle nodded slowly. Grania’s words made perfect sense to her; she could easily imagine how walking along these smooth, beautiful paths could help a person think. Before long they reached a surprisingly primitive cottage. The walls appeared to be made of stone, and the ceiling from bunches of dried grass.
“Here we are,” Grania said. She opened the door, nodded for Giselle to come in with her. The cottage was small, and filled with furniture that seemed to be fashioned out of wood and primitive textiles. Giselle goggled openly; she’d never seen anything like it.
“You live here?” she asked, and then closed her mouth with an embarrassed gasp. What a rude question…
Grania laughed, and Velor shook his head.
“It’s slightly more up-to-date than you might think from its appearance,” he said. “Our kitchen is modern, and we’re hooked into the ’net. But we find simplicity does help us stay focused on serving the Goddess.”
“It’s lovely,” Giselle said. “I guess I’ve never seen anything like this on a space station before.”
“Well, this is an unusual space station,” Grania said with a smile. “And you, Giselle, appear to be an unusual woman. Will you sit with me?”
She walked gracefully over to a large, wooden table, taking a seat along one side. Giselle sat across from her, feeling uncomfortable.
“I think you already know why I’m here,” Giselle said quietly. “I’m not quite sure what to do now, to be honest,” she added with a nervous laugh. “How can you tell if I’m Jerred’s life mate? Do you have to do tests, or scan me?”
“Oh, no, I don’t think that will be necessary,” Grania said with a serene smile. “I already know the answer.”
“Well?” Giselle asked, feeling a bit impatient. “What is it?”
“Do you really need me to tell you?” Grania asked quietly. “I don’t think that you do. I think that if you look into your heart you’ll know.”
It took all Giselle had within her not roll her eyes and snort in disgust. This was why she usually avoided temples. Too touchy-feely. “I don’t know,” she said slowly. “If I knew, I wouldn’t have asked you.”
Grania cocked her head at her and laughed. “Yes, I can see that,” she said. “You’re very literal-minded, and you don’t trust your senses, do you? You need to work on that child. It’s really the only way you’ll ever grow close to the Goddess.”
This time Giselle did sigh, wishing she’d never come. These people were like sticky candy—their words clung to her, clogging up her brain. Even the air in this place seemed to clog up her mind. Suddenly she felt hot and uncomfortable.
“I think you should tell her,” Velor said to his life mate, coming up behind her to place one hand on her shoulder. “She seems confused enough already.”
“Yes, I suppose you’re right,” Grania said. “It’s just that I wanted her to see for herself.”
“Well, I don’t see,” Giselle said, growing frustrated. “Please, tell me.”
“You and Jerred are clearly life mates,” Grania said, smiling. Giselle felt dizzy. Was this woman playing games with her? They hadn’t done any tests, how could they know for sure?
“The Goddess tells us these things,” Grania said, replying to her unasked question. Giselle started, suddenly feeling a little uncertain. She’d never really liked priests and priestesses who claimed to speak to the Goddess. In her experience, they usually wanted money. But this couple really didn’t seem to be asking anything of her.
“The Goddess rejoices at your presence, child,” Velor said, his voice soothing. “We were both able to feel it as soon as we met you. It will be stronger when your Jerred arrives, of course, but there’s no question that you’re newly life-mated.”
“So what does that mean?” Giselle asked, almost afraid to know the answer.
“Well, it means that you and Jerred will probably have very long, happy lives together,” Grania said. “Of course, there will be hard times. But, all in all, the Goddess chooses wisely when she creates mates. You are very lucky to have found each other.”
“What about Jerred?” Giselle asked, feeling even more confused. “How is he going to react to this?”
“Well, I would imagine that once he understands what’s going on he’ll be thrilled,” Velor said. “Although I wouldn’t be surprised if right now he’s tearing the station apart looking for you. My chief of security tells me that he’s demanding entrance to the temple,” he added, tapping his ear lightly. The man must have a communications implant, Giselle realized. How funny, that a man who lived in a wooden house had a com implant. This temple was an extremely strange place.
“You’d better go and fetch him, dear,” Grania said, turning her head to smile up at her mate. “The poor boy will have a heart attack if we don’t let him know his mate is safe. They tend to get very concerned about these things,” she added, looking at Giselle.
Velor nodded, then quietly left the room.
“He won’t be but a moment,” Grania said. “We have an entrance in back of the house, too. We only took you the long way because we wanted you to see some of the grounds.”
True to her word, Velor was back within moments. Jerred followed him, his face filled with strain. He came up to her and pulled her roughly into his arms.
“Are you all right?” he asked, running his hands over her shoulders.
“Yes,” she said, looking up at him with all the love she felt. She couldn’t quite figure out why he was so concerned. It wasn’t as if she hadn’t left a note.
“Xander told me he’d had a talk with you,” Jerred said, his face betraying his nerves. “He told me you’d gone to the temple. I was afraid you might be seeking sanctuary from me.”
“Sanctuary?” she burst out laughing. “Why on earth would I need sanctuary?”
He blushed, and then looked to Grania and Velor.
“Considering how I originally got you to come with me, I had reason to be worried,” he said softly. “My mind just kept racing through all the reasons you might be trying to leave me. I couldn’t understand why you’d go to the temple, either.”
“It is customary for life mates to have their union sanctified within the temple,” Grania said. Jerred’s head jerked up, and he looked at her.
“What are you saying?”
“We’re life mates, Jerred,” Giselle said softly, looking up into his face. For an instant, joy chased across his features, and then he seemed to clamp down on the emotion firmly.
“This isn’t a joking matter, Giselle,” he said. “You have no comprehension how unlikely it is that we could possible be life mates.”
“And yet that is exactly the case,” Grania said. “And I think you know that already, young man. You’re just afraid to give in to your happiness. You’re afraid to believe it’s real. But it is.”
Jerred suddenly sagged against her, clutching her so hard Giselle though she’d fall over. He caught himself quickly though.
“This is more than I could have imagined,” he muttered, giving her a soft kiss on the mouth. “Giselle, I love you. Will you do me the honor of sharing my life?”
“Oh, hell yes,” Giselle said. “Don’t be ridiculous. I don’t suppose you want to open up a bar, do you?”
He shook his head, and started laughing. “Can we discuss this further?” he asked. “I think we have quite a few things to talk about.”
“Not least of which is you getting out of the spying and smuggling thing,” Giselle said. “Or at least I hope you’ll consider it. I don’t think I can handle another run-in with Josiah.”
He kissed her, his mouth slanting over hers in a gesture that was frankly carnal. Giselle sighed, allowing herself to fall into the kiss. A second later they were brought up short by a discrete cough.
“As much as the Goddess celebrates physical love,” Velor said softly, “I believe I wouldn’t be overstating my bounds by requesting you celebrate yours in private.”