“Seriously? Your man is a poker master, and you only play slots?” Jez shook her head and tsked at me. “Sad.”
I followed her through the place, content to let her lead the way. A people-watcher could stay in this place round the clock and never run out of interesting things to see. The deeper we went into the casino, the more I felt like I was plunging into a human abyss. I scanned the crowd, feeling for anything present that wasn’t human. The energy in the casino was incredibly scattered, creating a loud noise inside my head. I struggled to shut it out to save my sanity.
The demon seated at a nearby table was unexpected. He looked up as we passed, our eyes connected. For a split second, I saw through his human façade to the black-winged, black-eyed creature beneath. He looked us over, lingering on Jez. Then his gaze fell to the demon mark on my wrist, and he turned away.
“I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that demons enjoy this city,” I muttered.
“Goes without saying, I’d think,” Jez quipped, pulling me along.
Once we got caught up in the buzz of playing and even won a few small jackpots, my tension eased, and I began to enjoy myself. Giggling like teenagers as we tossed back shooters; we became part of the room, just two more gamblers out to lose a crap load of dough. Despite our welcome wagon earlier, it felt damn good to unwind and leave my worries behind for a while.
“If you’d like some time alone with Shaz this week, I’m sure I can lure your vampire down here to play some poker.” Jez pumped quarters into the machine, waiting while I pushed the button. Nothing. Another quarter.
“Actually, that would be great. We haven’t had much time alone since he got home. It’s been awkward. Makes me wonder if it will ever feel right again.”
“He’s had your back from the start, long before you and Arys made your connection. You just need some time together, a chance to remember what made you fall in love.” Jez handed me another shooter and smiled. “You’re damn lucky, you know, to have them both.”
“Yeah,” I nodded, taking the shot and grimacing as it burned its way down to my stomach. “I know. But how realistic is it?”
“What do you mean?” Pausing to gather our meager winnings, Jez gave me a critical once over.
I shouldn’t say it, shouldn’t even think it. But she was one of my best friends, a girlfriend, the one person I could say it to. “Is it selfish of me to want them both? Because it feels like it is. It feels like—” I stopped short, struggling to get the words out. “It feels like it’s wrong. For Shaz. He deserves better. He deserves to be set free. Like Kale.”
Jez turned to me, taking my hand in hers. “Take a look around you. Do it. Now.” She waited expectantly for me to look around the noisy casino. “This is not the place to make those decisions. This is a place to put that shit to bed and go wild. No serious crap. Save it for when you get home. And don’t bring Kale into this. That is a whole other f**ked-up situation.”
“Thanks.” I rolled my eyes and stuck some of our winnings back into the machine. I watched the little pictures flip by, waiting for them to stop and proclaim us losers. That didn’t happen. Instead, we hit a small jackpot and won five hundred bucks.
“Now that’s what I’m talking about, baby!” Jez crowed with glee. “Now let’s take this five hundred and play some blackjack.”
It didn’t take her long to settle at a table with two others. I hung back, content to watch. In no time, Jez was losing a little but winning more. Surrounded by noise and chaos, people getting off on the rush of the risk, she was clearly in her element.
Sunrise was approaching. The casino may be void of windows and clocks, but I could feel it in my bones. I was beginning to tire, in need of a bath and some uninterrupted sleep. Jez didn’t appear to feel the same way.
Right about that time, two idiots at the next table over started shouting about cheating. The dealer was trying unsuccessfully to calm the commotion. A fist was thrown, and blood spilled. That’s all it took to shatter my control and bring my bloodlust bubbling to the surface.
I was suddenly aware of every heartbeat in the place. They pounded in my skull, reverberating through me in a discombobulated rhythm. So much blood, pumping through the veins of every human present. More than enough to bathe in. How many could I consume before security took me down?
I shook my head, refusing to allow those thoughts to take hold. Not here. Not like this. Taking deep breaths was impossible due to the lack of fresh air. Breathing in the scent of smoke, liquor and lively humans was not going to help. Stay calm. You got this. But I didn’t. A little personal pep talk wasn’t going to give me the strength I needed. Security quickly dealt with the troublemakers. The bleeder was gone. Too late though. The damage was done.
I grabbed Jez’s arm and leaned in close, whispering under my breath, “I’m leaving before I turn this place into a bloodbath.”