Lucian
Lia has been in the hospital now for three days. Yesterday, they started decreasing her sedating medications, planning to slowly bring her back to consciousness; they need her awake soon so they can assess her condition. So far, other than more movement during her sleep and twitching of her eyes, she hasn’t shown any signs of waking. She has had a CT scan daily, and thankfully, the swelling in her brain has been responding to the medication, but they still need to monitor her closely.
When a knock sounds at the door, I look up to see a tired-looking Aidan standing there. He and I haven’t discussed the possible change in Cassie that happened before Lia’s attack. When Aidan found out about Lia, he came back right away, taking over the operations of the company until I return. I haven’t left the hospital grounds since Lia was brought in. Cindy makes sure I have clean clothes daily, and Sam runs any errands that are needed. This is the first time Aidan has been here, so I’m momentarily surprised to see him.
He stands uncertainly in the doorway, and I motion him further into the room, walking over to greet him with a one-armed hug. When we step back, he looks at Lia and blurts out, “Holy fucking shit, I just…”
“I know,” I say. “All of the bruising makes it look even worse than it is.” It still astounds me when I see the black marks marring her face and arms, so I know well how it must be for Aidan, who is seeing her for the first time. Her nurse comes in at that moment, asking us to step out while she examines Lia. This happens multiple times per day, and I generally use the time to walk outside and smoke. When Sam saw how agitated I was on my second day without my drug of choice, he slapped a pack of cigarettes in my hand and told me to exchange one evil for another until I could get it out of my system. It’s no miracle cure, and I actually find the whole smoking thing disgusting, but it does help to take the edge off. Right now, I need that any way I can get it short of using again.
Aidan trails after me until we reach the small courtyard at the back of the property. This is the one and only area where smoking is allowed. Aidan’s mouth drops in surprise as I quickly light up, inhaling deeply before exhaling. “Damn, when did you start smoking?”
After another puff, I say, “Yesterday, before lunch, and yes, I know it’s fucked. I just…need something to get me by while Lia’s here.”
Understanding dawns on Aidan and he steps closer, saying under his breath, “Luc, I can get you something. Fuck, you must be about to come apart at the seams.”
In truth, I’ve gone far longer than three days without cocaine. I’m normally not a daily user; I could go weeks if I needed to. It is, however, my go-to answer for major stress, and Aidan is correct: three days under the type of pressure I’ve been dealing with has been hell, but I’m fighting it. “No, I’m trying to come off it. I’ll just keep smoking these nasty things and eating a pack of gum afterwards to combat the taste. I think I brushed my teeth fifty times yesterday.”
“Yeah, okay, man. Let me know if you change your mind.” I wonder idly why all of my friends are always so quick to offer to supply me. Maybe they should have staged an intervention long ago instead of enabling me. I offer him a cigarette, knowing he smokes on occasion—usually promoted by stress, as well—but he shakes his head, dropping to one of the cement benches. “What are you doing?” He asks so quietly I almost miss it.
I turn to face him, raising a brow. “I thought we already established that.”
Rubbing his face, he shakes his head. “No, what are you doing in this situation with this girl? Luc, you’re the strongest person I’ve ever known, but you can’t be here again. Lia reminded both of us of Cassie almost from the start, and now you’re back at the exact place where you almost lost it all before.”
Anger races through my veins, pissed he would dare to approach this subject right now. Feeling the need to hit back, I say, “You forgot one big difference. I’m not here because my fucking throat has been slit by my crazy girlfriend.”