She walks over and looks at the monitors, which display my vitals. “Now that you’re awake, I have to let the police know. They’ll want to come take your statement.” When I tremble, Lucian pulls me closer and his aunt pats my hand comfortingly. “There is nothing to be afraid of, Lia. They just need as much information as possible so they can find the person who did this to you. Remember, you’re the victim here. You didn’t do anything wrong.”
With those words, I start crying again, wondering if I’ll ever stop being the pathetic person I’ve turned into. Lucian and his aunt talk softly as he continues to hold and comfort me. I want nothing more than to go home with him and forget everything. I don’t want to admit to anyone what my stepfather did to me. Feeling dirty, I’m consumed with the urge to be clean, to wash away his scent, which suddenly seems to be everywhere. I struggle against Lucian’s hold, focused on nothing but scrubbing myself clean. “Shower,” I say to him desperately. “I have to shower, now, please.” I’m sobbing the words as he and his aunt try to calm me. I hear her say, ‘sedate’ and freeze. I vaguely remember that happening another time as Lucian held me. If I can just make them understand that I just need to make myself clean again… “Luc.” I turn my head until our eyes are locked. He looks so upset; I almost end my quest, but God, I need it so badly. “I just need to wash him off me. Please, I can still smell him on my skin. Just…I have to be clean.”
Lucian drops his forehead against mine, and we are communicating without words. He realizes what I need, and I know that nothing, even his aunt, will stop him from giving it to me. “Unhook her, Fae.”
“Luc, we need to wait until tomorrow. Lia, it’s really not a good idea to rush…” Fae’s words trail off as Lucian gets off the bed and calmly starts pulling the covers from my body. I hear her bite off a curse, which would have probably been highly frowned upon by the hospital administrators. “She’s taking a shower right now no matter what I say, isn’t she?”
“Yes,” Lucian answers firmly, giving no room for arguments. “I could really use your help, though, because I don’t want to mess anything up.”
His aunt brushes his hands aside as she pushes the call button on the side of the bed for the nurses’ station. When they answer, she requests immediate assistance and in less than a minute, another nurse is standing at my bedside. “Wendy, Miss Adams is going to take a shower so we need to start unhooking her. Lucian, please step out into the hall until I call you.” As both Lucian and I protest, she looks meaningfully at the catheter hanging at my bedside, silencing our protests immediately. He all but runs from the room, prompting his aunt to laugh. “Something about the threat of seeing that gets to them every time.”
I feel my face heating. It might be comforting to know my nurse, but in this instance, I’d have rather have a stranger than Lucian’s aunt touching my private areas, even if it is with complete clinical detachment. “Thank you,” I murmur shyly as I’m finally free from everything that had me tethered to the bed. My body is throbbing like a toothache, but I’m determined to see this through. I have to. When Lucian’s aunt asks me if I’m in pain, I say no. She looks at me as if she knows it’s a lie but doesn’t call me on it.
“All right, I think we’re ready to try this. Lia, I’ll change your bandages when you’re finished with your shower. Wendy, I’ve got it from here. You can tell Luc to step back in on your way out.”
Lucian comes back and walks to my side. “All ready?” he asks as he rubs my arm reassuringly.
“Luc, if you’ll help Lia into the bathroom, I’ll get the shower chair ready for her to sit in. Then you can wait for us in the room.”
“No!” I cringe as my voice echoes throughout the room. They both look at me with concern. “I mean, I want Lucian to help me…bathe.” His aunt is looking at me in surprise, but I see nothing but understanding in Lucian’s eyes. “I…he knows me,” I attempt to explain. In truth, I can’t stand the thoughts of anyone else but him being with me as I try to wash the filth from my body.