Forbidden

twenty-two

Claire savored the last bite of the crisp, cinnamony churro Alec had bought her as they wandered down the Santa Monica Pier past fast-food restaurants, portrait artists, and vendors selling sunglasses, jewelry, I HEART L.A. T-shirts, and other tourist memorabilia. She loved being with Alec. With him at her side, her fear of the Grigori Council was beginning to dissipate. Claire felt invulnerable. Happy.
And excited. Every time she stole a glance at Alec’s handsome face, and caught the warm glimmer in his green eyes, her heart rate sped up a little.
“You’ve told me a lot about the Grigori, but I’d love to know more about you,” Claire said. Seagulls cried overhead as the pair headed to the amusement park in the middle of the pier. “Are you really from Scotland?”
“Born and raised.” Alec finished his own churro, and they paused to drop their napkins and wrappers into a trash can.
“Do you really have an aunt in Korea and an uncle Gregory who pays your tuition?”
“No. I made them up—sorry.”
“How do you know Korean, then?”
“I’ve been able to understand every language on the planet since the day I was born. Every Grigori can do that.”
“Are you serious? You can speak Swahili? Mongolian? Basque?”
“Every language. It’s like our singing talent. I don’t necessarily know I can speak or read a language until the situation presents itself. When I hear someone talking, I automatically understand what they’re saying and can respond just as easily.”
Claire was impressed. She tilted her head toward a young couple nearby who were conversing quietly in what clearly wasn’t English. She lowered her voice. “Okay. What language are they speaking?”
Alec slowed his footsteps, then leaned in so only Claire could hear him. “Farsi, I think.”
She could feel his breath, warm and sweet, on her cheek. It made her skin tingle. “Have you ever spoken Farsi before?”
“No, only Arabic.”
“What are they saying?”
Alec stopped to listen, keeping his eyes averted. “The guy’s saying that they’ve known each other a long time, and he knows he should ask her father about this first, but—” Alec’s eyes lit up. “Oh, this is good. I think he’s getting ready to propose.”
“Really?”
Alec’s face was just inches away, his arm and hand nearly brushing hers. Claire longed to feel the warmth of his touch, wished desperately that he would take her hand in his—but she knew he was as worried about her getting an unwanted vision as she was. Reluctantly, she pulled back and they kept moving. When they were farther away, Claire turned to look behind them.
As Alec had predicted, the young Persian man was down on one knee, whipping a tiny red velvet box from his pocket, which he opened to reveal a ring. The woman gasped and began to cry with joy.
“That is so cool,” Claire said. “It’s like magic. Maybe it goes back to the Tower of Babel, when all the world spoke one language.”
“Maybe.”
They passed through the entrance of the amusement park.
“So if you used to travel the world, policing all the bad Awakened, how did you pay for it?” Claire asked. “Did you have a safety-deposit box full of passports and stacks of cash, like the CIA?”
“We had access to bank accounts around the world, but it wasn’t like a salary. We took what we needed for each job.”
“Where’d you get the money to come here?”
A cautious expression crossed his face. “I … slowly put that money aside, a wee bit at a time.”
“Isn’t that kind of like embezzling … from God?” Claire asked in faux shock.
Alec shrugged and grinned at her good-natured teasing. “Honestly, I don’t know where the money comes from. But I worked hard for it and like to think of it as saving meticulously.”
They’d reached the ticket booth for the Ferris wheel now. It towered above them, stopping intermittently to pick up passengers. After Alec bought their tickets and they’d moved into the waiting line, Claire asked more seriously, “How long did it take you to save?”
“Thirty years.”
“Wow. You’ve been planning this since before I was born?”
Alec glanced around them a little uncomfortably, but the only other people in line—a young mother tending to a couple of children—were paying no attention to them. He continued under his breath, “Aye. For a long time, this whole thing was just a dream I was toying with. By the time I mustered my resolve, I had saved enough to afford a place like Emerson.”
“Well, I’m happy you did.”
Handing over their tickets, Claire and Alec climbed on board the bright red gondola and sat down facing the ocean.
“Do you really find this kind of thing fun?” Alec asked dubiously as the wheel lurched them forward into the air, high above the pier.
“Yes! Whenever I ride one of these, I feel like I’m flying—something I’ve always wished I could do.”
Alec nodded with a small smile. “Oh, I see. That would be an attraction.”
The breeze felt cool against Claire’s face. Sunlight sparkled on the deep blue ocean below. Since it was a Monday afternoon, the wide expanse of pale sand was nearly devoid of people, except for the occasional stroller and a few surfers in wet suits, charging out with their boards to conquer the waves. Claire leaned back against the gondola seat, very aware of how close her jeans-clad thigh was to touching Alec’s. “What made you pick Emerson, specifically? Was it because of our lovely Los Angeles weather?”
“Partly. And because it’s a school where students seem to actually enjoy learning. I thought—I hoped—that it would help me fit in and remain inconspicuous.”
“So you had no idea I was here, or that I was a Halfblood?”
“Not until Vincent told me. If I had known, I would have chosen someplace else, for fear of being spotted by the local Watcher.” He glanced at her. “So I’m glad I didn’t know. Otherwise, we never would have met.”
The look in his eyes was so sincere, it filled Claire’s stomach with butterflies again. The Ferris wheel paused with them in midair, affording a panoramic view of the coastline. “Is that why you showed up at the mall the other day? Because you thought I was the one Vincent was looking for?”
“Ah. Funny story, that.” Alec cleared his throat. “Actually, the first person we zeroed in on was Neil.”
“Neil?” Claire started laughing. “Are you kidding? Why?”
“He sings. He’s an amazing athlete. He’s got a charm quotient that’s off the charts.”
“That’s a power?”
“It can be. In its most potent form, it’s called mind control. So I followed the four of you to Twin Palms, waiting for a hint of Neil’s aura or to see if he’d be approached by the Fallen.”
Claire shifted so she could face him. “And here I thought you followed me because you were jealous.” As soon as the words left her mouth, hot blood rushed to her face. Did she really just admit that? Really?
Alec’s eyes met hers. “Do you want me to be jealous?” he asked quietly.
Claire felt as if her tongue was lashed to the roof of her mouth. “I…”
Alec leaned in closer. “Well?”
Claire’s heart skipped a beat. A shiver ran through her limbs, even though she was warm. His lips were so tantalizingly close. Her heart thundered in her chest. She wanted him to kiss her, wanted it more than anything.
At that moment, the Ferris wheel started up again with a jolt that broke the spell. Hot disappointment washed through her. Alec leaned back, a look of sudden awareness and regret on his face. “Maybe we shouldn’t…,” he began. “I mean, until you learn to control your gift better. I wouldn’t want you to…”
“You’re right,” she agreed reluctantly, her cheeks burning. “We probably shouldn’t…”
They fell silent. The Ferris wheel whirred around in a smooth and faster cycle. The wind was in her face again, and Claire was grateful for the breezy distraction as she willed her body to cool down and her heart to resume its natural cadence.
Alec studied her with a slow grin. “I feel like I’m under strict Grigori law again.”
“What do you mean?”
“Physical contact is frowned upon in my culture.”
“Are you saying … you aren’t allowed to touch each other? Or anyone? Ever?”
Alec nodded.
“Why? That’s awful!”
He pursed his lips, thinking. “How can I help you understand this? Even though we live on Earth, our culture is very removed and isolated, and more … well, Vulcan, than anything. We follow ancient laws and traditionally, we don’t have families. Mating is allowed only once every five decades, at an appointed day and time scheduled by the Elders.”
Claire stared at him. “You’re kidding.”
“I wish I were. The Elders choose the partners who are to engage in each one-time coupling. Sex isn’t for pleasure, only reproduction.”
“Oh. So, have you”—Claire blushed again, the heat traveling up to the roots of her hair—“ever engaged in a … coupling?”
“No. I’m not old enough. You have to be at least two hundred and fifty.”
Claire was surprised by how ridiculously pleased she was to hear that. “So I guess with so few of those going on, there aren’t many children.”
“No.”
“What happens to the kids?”
“Children are raised by a tutor or godparent—a Grigori who generally has no offspring of their own.”
“In your case, Vincent.”
He nodded. “However, my parents got tired of the rules. They secretly formed an alliance similar, in many ways, to a human marriage. Although as a young child I spent half my time with Vincent to keep up appearances, the rest of the time I lived with my mother and father covertly, in a remote corner of Scotland.”
Claire felt a rush of empathy for him. “That must have been hard. From the time you were born, you’ve always been hiding something.”
“Aye.” He sighed, then added, “But then again, I did get to spend the first ten years of my life with parents who loved each other—and me—and who ignored the restrictions on physical contact. Although my mother did have to be careful not to crush my father and me to death when she hugged us.”
“That’s right! Your mother had superstrength!” Claire couldn’t help but laugh.
“Funny, isn’t it?” he agreed. “But I can relate to the problem. I’ve been afraid to hurt you in the same way.”
Claire’s blush deepened, and she wasn’t sure what to say.
Alec’s eyes found hers again. “That desire to show affection through touch—I’ve never forgotten it. It’s something Grigori don’t usually experience, as far as I know.”
“I guess that explains why you, of all people—I mean Grigori—went AWOL.”
He nodded pensively as the wheel slowed to a halt again. “I guess it does.”
They had stopped at the very top of the Ferris wheel. The view was breathtaking, but Claire gave it only a cursory glance. Her attention was fixed on Alec. Beneath his show of quiet strength, she sensed his deep vulnerability. The thought of all he’d been through—and all the loneliness he’d endured for more years than she’d been alive—wrenched at her heart.
Her entire body trembled with the desperate need to touch him, to offer him some comfort. She yearned to hug him, to feel his hands on her body, to feel his lips on hers.
“I want…,” she began.
“I know. So do I.” His eyes and voice were filled with longing, but also concern. He waited, allowing her to make the choice.
Claire held her breath. His hand was resting in his lap. She reached out until her own hand hovered just an inch above his. Alec had said she could learn to control her powers. Could she do it? Did she dare?
“It’s all right,” he encouraged softly. “Just focus, Claire. Command your mind to stay in the moment, and not to travel.”
She nodded, steeling herself. Their gazes locked. Her stomach tensed. Focus. Focus. Her entire body felt like a taut wire. I am Claire, she insisted silently. I will stay Claire, and I will remain here beside Alec. Slowly, gingerly, she lowered her hand until it closed over his. At first, as the gentle warmth from his skin radiated into her palm, she remained completely still, afraid to move or breathe, mentally repeating the words over and over like a mantra. Let my mind remain here. Let my mind remain here. To her relief, there was no dreaded, burning heat, no warning flush of a vision.
It worked, she rejoiced inwardly. It worked!
Alec smiled into her eyes. It felt so wonderful to touch him. Silently repeating the mantra, Claire slid her fingers around his to cup his hand, then squeezed it. Alec squeezed her hand back, his gaze never leaving hers—a wordless communion that sent a thrilling tingle up her arm and, with the speed of an arrow, straight into her heart.
Without further reflection, Claire dove across the space between them, wrapped her arms around Alec, and brought her lips to his. She sensed his initial surprise, but then he wound his arms around her, drawing her close as he kissed her back.
The kiss started slowly, a sweet, tentative searching. Alec’s lips and tongue felt warm against hers, mesmerizing her. As their mouths melded with growing fervor, a sudden image infiltrated Claire’s brain. She recognized it as what Alec must have experienced while gazing at her that afternoon in the stairwell when they first sang together. No! Stay! Claire ordered her mind, rejecting the lovely vision of how Alec saw her then, concentrating with every molecule of her being on the here and now and her own body. Stay in the present. Be in this moment.
The invading image fled. To Claire’s relief, she was herself once more. Alec drew back slightly, his eyes searching hers, and she could hear and feel his breath coming in unsteady gasps that echoed her own.
“Are you okay?”
Claire smiled. “I’m fine. More than fine.”
“Well thank goodness for that.” He brought his mouth back to hers.
His kiss grew bolder and more passionate, awakening new sensations deep within her. She melted into his embrace, kissing him hungrily, parting her lips and letting desire draw her down. She smoothed her hands over the sinewy muscles of his upper arms, then reveled in the feel of his lean, hard back beneath his T-shirt. As she pressed herself against him, straining to get closer, his hands moved restlessly up and down her back, then rose up to tangle in her hair. All the while, she repeated the mantra to herself: Stay in the present. Be in this moment.
She loved the way they fit together, loved the way he tasted and felt. It was as if they were two halves of a circuit suddenly connected and made whole, allowing a current of electricity to spark between them. She never wanted the kiss to end.
The wheel began to spin forward again and they broke apart, both breathing hard. Claire was stunned. The look on Alec’s face told her he felt the same way. With a deep, happy sigh, she leaned her head on Alec’s shoulder. His arm slid around her. They remained in that position, silently staring out at the ocean during the final revolution of the ride. It took every minute of that time for Claire’s breathing and heart rate to return to something approaching normal.
When the wheel carried them down to the bottom and they had disembarked, Alec reached for her hand with a smile. “I’ve decided,” he said as they headed back down the pier, “that I like Ferris wheels.”